I had to go into the office to pick up a new office chair. Broke my old one throwing a temper tantrum. Kidding. Would have been a nice edition to the story, though.
Being as I have been working from home, had not driven to work in more than a year.
I was confident that I remembered the way. Smh. Both, Yikes and Egads appeared just in case they would be needed. Okay, they both arrived with popcorn to enjoy the upcoming festivities. This is known as foreshadowing for those who don’t write…*sigh*.🤷♀️
I jumped in the car, cranked up the volume on my music and…
Life tapped me on the shoulder and said: okay, so you just may want to google map your way. It HAS been a minute. Also, you drove to work in the dark morning hours. Things look completely different, in the light.
I got this, I advised life pridefully. Yikes said, well, Yikes. Dropping the popcorn, Yikes could see it had been dragged into the fray.
God then said: My Child, I love thee with an everlasting love. That said, um, you know you may have a challenge or two when it comes to directions. Maybe, you should google map your way.
I got this, I confidently told God. Wanted to make Dad proud, you see. Egads said, well, Egads and joined Yikes.
Paying none of them no mind, I made my way to work. Traffic was a beast. No matter, I had conquered traffic the weekend before last.
🚗. I rocked and rolled my way to work. I told yall! Ha!
Yikes!
Egads!
👀…hhmm…*Cassandra realizes she may or may not perhaps kinda sorta what had happened taken the wrong turn.
*Ten extra minutes later, Cassandra entered work directions and listened to google map’s chastisement ALL the rest of the way to work*.
The extra driving time was nice. ALL things work for our good, remember? God and Life had already baked my goofness into the equation.
Also, Yikes and Egads both agreed this would be a lovely thing to blog about. May as well make some lemonade from the lemons I created.
Don’t be afraid to make lemonade, even when you are the one who required Life to bop you upside the head with lemons.
This was just another reminder to ensure that I am standing on firm foundation. This presented another opportunity to stretch my faith muscles by telling pride to kick rocks and asking, google maps, aka God and Life, for some help.
God is a very PRESENT help in the time of trouble. Even in the trouble we bring on ourselves.
Don’t think your troubles are too insignificant for God and Life to take interest in and charge over.
Don’t allow your making a mistake, big or small, to keep you from seeking help. Don’t punish yourself because you made the mistake, in the first place.
Even the big mistakes. The doozies. The ones you can’t think about, let alone forgive yourself. Even in these, God and Life are there for you.
They got this. Let them have you.
You CAN. You WILL.
Go…okay, so don’t forget to take google maps with you. Yikes and Egads may want to join for your festivities. 👍
Healthwise, workwise, likewise. Hard enough I actually considered quitting.
Nevertheless, I stood. On zero sleep. On zero personal understanding. On pressure from without and from within.
I thought of how I allowed myself to stand alone, the other day, when the pressure was the same.
I REFUSED to stand on my own, today. I turned on praise/worship music I wasn’t feeling. KNOWING that God inhabits the praises of His People.
I yelled aloud the scripture that God is a PRESENT help in the time of trouble. I hollered for help, literally. Told God I needed help, that I wanted to quit. Told Him I am NOT a quitter and will stay here, in this very spot, until He gives me GRACE.
I did not ask for a way of escape. This is HIS way for me, in this present moment. He knows why He needs me here. It’s not about my comfort, right now.
There are times, in our lives, when God and Life just needs us to stay there, in the hard place, at the hard time. They don’t have the time to tell us why. Someone is in need. The someone may not even be you.
Does it really matter?
It does not. So, I stood. THIS time, I stood on God’s Word, on God’s CHARACTER, and on God’s Deep and Abiding Love for me.
In doing those things, I saved myself from making a permanent choice to take me out of a temporary situation.
Either way, the loser would have been me. The loser may have also been others that God and Life had been tending to THROUGH my standing.
Our standing affects EVERYTHING and EVERYONE in our circle and beyond.
God told me once that our lives are like making a ripple. That ripple can turn into a pond. That pond can become an ocean. That ocean can become a tsunami. That tsunami can change the world.
WE can change the world. At the very least, we change our world and the worlds around us just by standing.
I have no idea if these words have helped a soul. I know they touched MY soul.
I changed my own life by checking myself, BEFORE I wrecked myself. I could have brought a negative tsunami, of my own making, by standing on fear, doubt, unbelief.
We can also wreck ourselves when wanting OUT. Just out of the hard situation. We do ourselves such a disservice, I think.
We fight, to the death, for folks we care for. Would never give up so easily when it comes to them. Yet, we can give ourselves permission to give up, give in and make excuses why we didn’t, couldn’t, or wouldn’t.
The more I stand, the more that I hang out with God and Life, the more They give of Themselves to me, the more I want to give to Them. I can’t give Them less than 100.
I can’t give myself less than 100.
I even refuse to lean my full weight upon my fam or folks who love me. I put my full weight on God’s Shoulders.
AFTER leaning on God, on God’s CHARACTER, and God’s Deep and Abiding Love for me, I allowed myself to reach out to ask for grace.
The bible says that Gods yoke is easy and His burden is light. Leaning upon HIM, the hard place was still hard but my heart was now light.
I could see, again. I could hear, again. I could breathe, again.
When all hell breaks loose, when situations come at you in waves, when pain, physical, mental, or otherwise, rocks your world it’s easy to look upon the waves and become fearful.
Remember, beloved to CHOOSE to stand. Then, stand.
The more life, situations, and folks cut up on you, the more practice you get standing, leaning, exercising your faith, allowing your fam/friends to step back from their need to want to rush in and save you from hurt and discomfort.
ALL things work together, for our good. No, God and Life does not enjoy seeing us in pain. Yet, the pain is normal when giving birth, when something is being healed, when things are lost and/or taken away.
It is only AFTER we have come out, on the other side, that we reap the rewards of standing: our faith is strengthened, our joy is restored, our hope is renewed.
This is exactly why Jesus went to sleep during the storm. He had full confidence in God’s Word to go to the other side, on God’s CHARACTER, that they would arrive safely, and on God’s Deep and Abiding Love, that He will ALWAYS be there to protect us.
Standing, is a choice. WHAT to stand on, is a choice. Even choosing not to choose, causes life/situations/others to choose what we stand on, what we stand FOR.
Standing was hard, today. Nevertheless, I stand.
Standing hurt, today. However, I embrace the Yikes and the Egads and have laughed my way through the hard.
Did the hard stop being hard? Of course, it didn’t.
I thank God and Life for all the hard moments, today. I am grateful for them. They have made me a better me. They have drawn me closer to living life, not simply surviving it.
What a beautiful place this hard place has turned out to be. Think I shall use God’s Pillow and stick around this hard a while.
Keep going. Keep standing. Lean heavily on His Power not your will power. Your willpower won’t when the rubber meets the road.
We got this. God and Life has us.
Remember God loves you no matter how many times you fall, no matter of you win the day or feel as though you have lost it.
Your victory was had the MOMENT you CHOSE to stand. Even if you fell, you won still. Arise. Begin, again. I begin with you.
A war has broken out. One, inside me. I find the 52 year old me in an intense war, with the 17 year old me. This war has been going on for the past few days.
As God and Life digs deeper and requires more, of me, of my effort, if my safe spaces, of ALL of my spaces…*sigh*.
Freedom is wonderful. It comes at great price. Freedom, TRUE freedom, costs you everything. EVERYTHING.
Yet, in giving up everything, you FIND everything. You find you.
Here lately, I have been perfectly content to allow God and Life full access to every area, space, dream, goal, love that I have.
“Have at it”, I confidently told them. SMH. I was confident They could do and have all of me, knowing all is for my good. Yea, I figured I would have an uncomfortable moment or two or ten. I could ‘manage’ those. I could handle those. I could stand: on God’s Word, on God’s CHARACTER, and upon God’s Deep and Abiding Love for me.
Anyone can stand, for a while. Anyone can boldly give up this or that, when the giving up of this or that does not require much thought, effort or truly giving up of a thing, hope, dream, hurt, loss, pain.
God and Life are super smart. They know, full well, we all in it and will give all and do all so long as not too challenged, so long as They keep away from ‘certain areas’. It’s like company coming over. Rather, ‘certain’ company that comes over.
Close fam/friends get to sit in the comfy room where everyone hangs out. Super close fam/friends get to hang out in the bedroom or separate ‘living spaces’ where we let our hair all the way down. Magazines tossed about, couch pillows every which way. This is the place where we are the loudest, where we feel the most comfortable, where we truly let our hair/guards down.
The ‘other room’ is for company that rarely comes. It is always immaculate. No one really ‘lives there’, you know? I guess it can be called the pretend living room. We put company there to impress them. We don’t expect them to stay long. They don’t. They have received the message to visit, to not go deep, to keep it brief and keep it moving along. Another visitor checked off of our ‘have to’ list in ‘reaching out’ and loving folks.
I must admit, and, it pains me to admit this, to me, ESPECIALLY to me, that I have been keeping everyone in the pretend living room. Yes, I go and visit them. To THEIR homes. I go and minister to them and encourage them. Then, retreat and retire to my pretend living room. If I invite them over, it’s not to the comfy room, the ‘living room’.
I’m a passionate person. Always have been. Always will be. That ‘passion’ has always been viewed as ‘too much’. Too loud. Too ‘angry’. Too passionate.
“Use your indoor, voice”
“No one has time for all that”
“Why do you ALWAYS have to have something to say about this or that?”
“Why can’t you keep that to yourself?”
“Does it really take all that?”
“Is it really all that serious?”
I would rush out, fling my arms wide, and invite the world in. Just wanted to share my heart, my thoughts, my joy with the whole world. I wanted to love the world and have the world love me back.
At times, some would come. They would hang with me, in the living room. We would kick it. Eventually, I would become ‘too much’. Too loud, too passionate. Too, something or other.
Over time, I learned to invite less and less peep over. Okay, I would invite the same folk over. But, I began to use the pretend living room. Now, when folks came to ‘visit’, I learned to tone down the joy. I learned to share surface things with them. They gladly accepted the surface things, I found. Much easier for folks to stay on the surface, of life. Very unsatisfying to me but something I had gotten used to, over the years.
The only time I could be FULLY me was when I was hanging out with God. With Jesus, specifically. I could be as loud as I pleased. I could be me. I COULD BE ME! Jesus loved me. ALL of me. He seemed to love the loudest parts, the silliest parts, the most.
He and I talked endlessly, for hours, about everything and nothing. He kicked it with me in my living room, laughed with me in the pretend living room. Eventually, He helped me realize it’s okay for me to be so passionate. I was made this way. His Love helped woo me to the love of The Father. This was a scary place to go, for me.
Father was a hard word for me. A father was harsh. A father was a task master. Or, so I believed. Long story short, I learned to trust God, The FATHER. Eventually, He became MY Father. He became My Home. And, in becoming Home made Himself completely at home. God invited Life to come with(they are a set, you know?), and both took abide with me, in me.
Which brings me to current events: Civil War….*sigh*.
In unpacking, God and Life have discovered many boxes in needing of being unpacked. Time to deal with things. Time to deal with ME.
The more God and Life has freed me, the less I am willing to keep hiding me, hiding my passion, from this world. I find I can no longer bear to be less than 100. With God. With Life. With family. With friends.
Friends? Are they really? Have I really ALLOWED them to be? Have I hidden behind the tired excuses folks are too busy, they have kids, they have work, they have this or that? Has it been easier, for me to be less of me, hoping to receive more of them?
Yikes. Egads….hmm….where did yall come from?!….*Cassandra weighs embracing Yikes and Egads to find out where they are leading her. Or, should she continue to reside in her pretend hiding room, even from herself*….
In being 100, and unpacking a Yikes, I find that I have been protecting myself and not showing all. Yes, I give 1,000 percent when it comes to encouraging folks, loving folks, being there for folks. Keeping it 100, as young folks say, I must admit to showing about 75 percent, of me, so folks won’t think it too much, think I am ‘too much’.
Egads, I find I no longer have a ‘not enough’ problem. In doing away with distractions, I find that I have a ‘too much’ problem. I find part of my heart standing, alone, upon a ‘it’s okay’ post. I won’t be ‘too much’. I will be silent. I will be ‘convenient. I shall be like a Hallmark Card: wonderfully encouraging, when needed, tucked away, in a drawer, when not.
Look closer, says God. Look closer, says Life. In looking closer, I find the one standing, alone, is me, yet not. It’s the 17 year old me. The 52 year old me looks at her and am sad. I know she is standing on sinking sand.
I want to race to her. Want to shout to her to come down from there.
“COME DOWN FROM THERE!” You don’t have to be there. You are loved. God loves you. Life loves you. I love you. You don’t have to be anything less than 100 percent of you.
Go to her, God says. Go to her, says Life. I go to her. She has run away. Stalemate.
It’s time to deal with her, God says. It’s time for you to deal with her, Life says. It’s time to deal with me, says me.
The only way that I know to get to her, to get to ME, is through words. It’s all that I have to try and set her free. The 17 year old me. She has been silently getting in the way of just too many things. She is making it difficult for God and Life to be fully at home. She is angry. Extremely angry. Something happened, when she was 17 and she has been angry every since.
Angry with God. Angry with Life. Angry with…more later on that. Angry with herself. Especially, with herself. She has been angry for 35 years. God is tired of seeing her lugging that hidden anger, that silent anger, that raging anger that will burn down the whole house, if He does not step in. If I do not step in.
I invite you to come with me, as I go in search of her, in search of me, through letters. I shall sneak them, one by one, under her bedroom door. Hopefully, she will come out soon. Hopefully, we can connect, she and I. I need for her to forgive herself. She was 17. She did the best she could. Alas, I had best save these arguments for her.
Pray for me as I go to her. Come with me. Maybe, just maybe, you also have a part of yourself that is struggling to be free of anger, hurt, fear, pain, whatever it is that has been holding you back for years, for decades.
We have a life to live, not survive. I am done surviving. I am done showing less of me, hoping to get more of you. If you can’t deal with ALL of me, that’s okay. I shall enjoy life with God, with Life, with fam/friends who get a kick out of the loud me, the sports nut me, the super in love with God me, the super serious me, the stupid me, the ridiculous me. Yikes and Egads thinks I am a hoot. I keep them around with my shenanigans and thoughts and deeds. Yikes. Egads. See?
Both things would have been true had I actually been standing: on God’s Word, on God’s CHARACTER, and on God’s Deep and Abiding Love for me.
However, I had actually been compensating and leaning upon my own strength, trying to figure things out with my own understanding, trying to encourage myself with my own inadequate words.
Both God and Life tried to get me standing with Them. I must admit to having a bit of pride and letting Them know that “I got this”.
Turns out I didn’t ‘got this’. In fact, I got got.
Yikes!
Egads!
God understands. Life understood. It’s why They have baked our standing, not standing, compensating into the equation.
However things turn out, ALL things still work together for our good. My stumbling moments put me on my knees, had me crawling in God’s lap, had me comforting myself with the knowledge that God loves me, still.
He loves me, still. Even in my lowest moments, even in my most frustrating moments, God loves, Jaybird, still.
Still, I fly, dented, valiant, free, joyous, brilliant, abiding in the shadow of The Most High.
I stand. Surrounded. By God. By His Love. He stands with me.
We stand…
Keep going. Stand. When you stumble, gather yourself and stand again.
The day had started out really well. Fantastic, in fact.
I had ended the evening well: spent some delicious hours hanging out with God, Life and a bit of bible study.
Went to bed on time. Meaning, I was up way too long catching up on my sports programs.
Bounded out of bed to snag coffee: translation – begged and pleaded with the comforter for a few more minutes of sleep before relinquishing the night to its rightful place.
Coffee consumed, breakfast eaten, music blasted (ear buds used, of course), I took up where I left off with my study of Psalm 31.
“How comforting, I told myself”. I was in a good place so was having compassion for poor King David who sure was getting beatdown in this passage. Poor man. Smh.
I thought it super sweet how God had bent down His ear to hear David’s cry.
I thought it particularly poignant when David said:
Psalm 31: 7-10 – 7 I will be glad and rejoice in thy mercy: for thou hast considered my trouble; thou hast known my soul in adversities; 8 And hast not shut me up into the hand of the enemy: thou hast set my feet in a large room.9 Have mercy upon me, O Lord, for I am in trouble: mine eye is consumed with grief, yea, my soul and my belly. 10 For my life is spent with grief, and my years with sighing: my strength faileth because of mine iniquity, and my bones are consumed.
I thought it was awfully neat how God was there for David when he was in trouble. Not being in trouble, currently, I figured this was just a nice Bible study for Bible study purposes. Smh. Poor me. I had no clue what the day held in store for me.
About 10 minutes into my first cup of coffee, life circumstances decided to kick me in the face. After I came to, it appeared that all hell and broken loose upon my day. The day turned out to be so upsetting, it apparently alerted my blood pressure who decided to run up as high she could possibly go. I had long since forgotten about Psalm 31.
Upset, frustrated, hurt, I rushed to call my big brother and tell him about my troubles. Of course, being at work, my big brother had no time for me. I couldn’t call my sister as she had things to do until evening.
Upset, frustrated, hurt, wearily picked up my phone to look at a text someone had sent me. These were the exact words of the text:
Isaiah 41:10 – 10 Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.
This person always knows when I need to hear something. Not just something, but the perfect Scripture.
Here I was, burning up phone lines, trying to find someone to cast my cares upon, when God had already provided His Shoulder, early this morning, long before hell had come looking for me. Knowing I would forget all about standing, in the midst of this sneak attack, God sent a friend to text me that God, indeed, had my back.
it’s quiet now. I have time to reflect upon the day. It’s easy to see now, how I allowed the circumstances to overwhelm me.
I forgot all about my friends, Yikes and Egads.
I forgot to stand upon God’s Word.
I forgot to lean upon God’s character.
Mostly, sadly, I forgot to lean upon God’s Deep and Abiding Love for me.
Had I done those things, I could have spent the day embracing Yikes and Egads and had a great time laughing at all the days missteps and mistakes and what in the fresh hells.
I could have crawled onto God’s lap and told Him all ’bout my troubles.
Thankfully, we can start our day over whenever we like. I’m starting over, right now. As we speak, am fixing to have coffee with God and Life and am going to tell both of them all about my troubles. I am even inviting Yikes and have him share my most ridiculous moments. Egads! Appears Egads wants to come to.
I shall end this day the very same way I began it: a bit of time with God, a few minutes of quiet, and a grateful heart. Thank you, God, for being there for me, before I knew I needed You.
Yep, I am paying for my crime in not writing about doing a factory reset on my laptop.
How, you ask…system update wouldn’t update leading me to have to go back to the previous state. Which, you guessed it was the factory reset.
This time, however, I am a bit faster re installing things. Okay, I’m not but I am using my standing skills in NOT allowing myself to be distracted with frustration.
Choosing annoyance and pouting would only waste time. Instead, I pumped up the volume on my praise music, thanked God and Life for my laptop knowing many don’t have one.
I thanked Them for my home, knowing many don’t have one.
I thanked God and Life for the humor they birthed me with, knowing many don’t have my disposition.
I thanked God and Life for being with me, ALWAYS, knowing many have no idea they are not alone regardless of how they feel or what’s going on in their lives.
I thanked God and Life for my phone, being able to research my issue and be able to begin again, to restore to the previous state.
I thanked God and Life for restoring me and setting me upon a rock: God’s Word, God’s CHARACTER, and God’s Deep and Abiding Love for me.
Next, I told myself to take my time and do things right, the first time. I refused to get in a hurry.
God and Life are NEVER in a hurry. The INSTANT you feel rushed STOP right where you are.
Take a breath. Take a break. Grab a cup of coffee.
THEN, track down the Yikes, the Egads, the hurried feeling. Once you have talked with them and have centered yourself, begin again.
Once I did these things I was able to download my photos from my phone to my laptop. Or so I thought. Ack!!
The folder showed up but was empty. I tried everything. Finally, I remembered that I had to allow my phone to pair with my laptop. All the maneuvering in the world could not rectify my download issues until I ALLOWED these files to be downloaded onto my laptop harddrive.
God, Life, our loved ones all need for us to allow them access: to our heart, to our thoughts, to our hopes/dreams and to our fears.
Don’t allow frustrations or seeming setbacks to keep you from giving access to those who only wish to love and support you.
Allow access.
Be patient with yourself.
Understand God and Life may need to reboot and/or restore things from time to time.
Embrace the icks, yikes, oops, whatevers and keep it moving.
Choose to use EVERY opportunity to grow, to extend your faith, to learn something new or unlearn something old.
EVERY moment is an opportunity. What are you doing with your moments?
As for me, my moments are being used to allow God and Life full access to me.
I was doing great, for time, getting my office situated. Like a big dummy, however, I let myself get distracted in conversation with a friend. Of course, said distraction led me to running out of time, to do the vacuuming. I told myself I was simply being a good neighbor and not making all kinds of racket, this late at night.
This was a wonderful excuse, until God and Life asked me why didn’t I just use the broom sitting, over there, in the corner? The corner also in need of a good sweeping and/or vacuuming?
Good question. Yikes. Egads. True that, Yall.
Stomping quietly, couldn’t wake up the neighbors, being neighborly and all, I snorted, flounced and pouted my way to the stupid broom…..*mutters to self*…and continue on with my chore of getting cleaned, organized and ready to live life, not just to survive it.
Reminds me of a conversation recently had, or visited upon me, by my accountability partner. I thought I had been tearfully and understandably, presenting my case on why I could NOT blog that day. I had not yet restored my laptop(another story on another day. It’s called ‘Factory Reset. Ok, have to keep it 100 and admit that I have been stalling about writing THAT particularly piece. How do I know this? Because I have been writing about everything BUT that since my accountability partner told me she could not wait to read it….*sigh*…dear Lord a sista reads me up and down, yall)
*Cassandra realizes she has allowed herself to become distracted from writing about not allowing oneself to become distracted as easy to become distracted when Life and God gets to. Speaking of that Cassandra thinks of the time that….oppss…ehem…..*Cassandra gets some shut up and keeps it moving*…..how distracting!
Anywho, I was pleading my ability of not being able to blog due to all the ‘puter issues I had been having. She asked her simple, nothing simple at ALL about her simple questions, “why don’t you just write things down with pen/pencil and paper?
Of course, that gave me the perfect excuse that my handwriting was too poor due to the neurological issues I was having. God and Life was having none of this. BOTH told me to get off my hind end, transfer all of my files to the external hard drive I had just purchased, and get my laptop, to have some act right! For ME, to get some act right!!
Trust me, when God and Life tells you to get some act right, best believe you will start to get some act right, on your own, if you are smart/wise/like no pain applied to the hind end/ready to say uncle. Yikes. Egads.
I swept up. Even pulled out the super cute storage desk sis had gotten me for my birthday. It is soooooooooooo cute! Here I was having my desk lamp and such on a barstool.
Sorry, God. Sorry, Life. Sorry, sis. Sorry, me. I will do better.
I will LIVE, not simply survive. I will do the needed things, the hard things, the tiring things, the frustrating things, the life-giving things, the life-affirming things that will help me to continue to grow closer to God, to Life, to myself, to my family, to my friends.
It is so easy to allow distractions to keep us from doing the things that we KNOW we should be doing. Rather, COULD be doing. Neither God, nor Life, will beg us to do the needed things, the necessary things, the required things. All they will do is ask. Ask and Wait. Wait and Ask.
The trick to overcoming distractions is understanding there is a big difference between taking time away from a project, job, situation to refresh yourself and get back after it. Or, avoiding the project, job or situation because you don’t want to deal with it/them/that.
Avoiding life, is not living it. It is surviving it. We done with survival, remember?
When you find yourself beginning to avoid Yikes, Egads and the like, ask yourself why? Are you: tired, frustrated, sad, mad, wondering, tired of wondering, wandering, forever tired of wandering? Etc etc ad nauseum.
Deal with WHY you have allowed yourself to become distracted, then get back after getting some act right and taking care of the person/place/thing.
I feel good, looking around at the partially swept floor. Yes, I admit it. I allowed myself this momentary distraction, to tell you not to allow your momentary distractions, to become permanent distractions. We have things to do. We have people to love. We have all manner of dreams to conquer. We don’t have time for distractions, yall.
Speaking of distractions, yall are distracting me! I have to get back after it…*sigh*…..*Cassandra picks up the broom and gets to work*.
Last words, for real, for real: God and Life are in need of us. They need our gifts, our talents, and our love. They need us to be shoulders for others to lean on, hearts to love others with, arms to hold those in need of care. The bible says that as He is, so are we in this world. It’s not just our business most of us are to be about. It’s about the business of others: friends, family, loved ones, coworkers, strangers.
Even if you don’t have a relationship with God, Life still asks for you to engage, to be a part of it. Yep, just ain’t no getting around the fact that YOU are needed. If you are reading these words, yes, I be talking to you homie/homette! 😉
John 9: 4-5 – 4 I must work the works of him that sent me, while it is day: the night cometh, when no man can work. 5 As long as I am in the world, I am the light of the world.
If you hear not another word spoken from me, hear, receive and KNOW this: God SEES you, God LOVES you, and God CARES DEEPLY for your life.
Your life was worth the death of a King. THE King. His Name is Jesus. He wants to be Your Homie. Your Best Friend. Your Protector. Your Cheerleader. He wants you to get closer to God, to Life, to those around you.
It is my continued prayer that you allow Life, God and others to love you. Life is short. Live it.
I have had the greatest time talking to my Dragon software and having it do all the work for me. The hardest part for me was training the Dragon software to recognize my voice. This takes hours to do. In fact, it took so long to do that I hesitated from having to do it.
Many years ago, I had complained to a friend that it was hard for me to write due to all the typing my job required. This was very frustrating for me. There were many things I wanted to say, yet no time, or so I told myself, to write the things that I wanted to write, things that I NEEDED to write. Knowing this, my friend ordered me some Dragon software and sent it to me.
I was ecstatic, until I saw all that was involved in setting up the user profile. Yikes!
Of course, this was another excuse for me not to write. I told myself I just do not have the time to sit for one to two hours to set up my user profile.
SMH. Okay, really, Cassandra?…*sigh*.
Isn’t that just like us, though? We ask for things from God and Life, then wait for them to do the thing for us. Often times, we want the reward, without the effort. We want the world without the striving. We want the thing, without the doing.
Yet, God and Life are not like that. Both require our time. Both require our effort. Both require that we give our all to Them. Both require that we keep our word to Them. Both demand things from us. Both demands that we demand things from ourselves.
This life is NOT meant to be a spectator sport!!
Life demands to be seen, heard, and LIVED.
Life cannot stand being survived. To Life, surviving is a big waste of time. Surviving involves hiding: from Life, from God, and especially from ourselves.
It troubles God greatly, when we try to survive life. He wants us to have an abundant life. He wants us to have a joyful life. He wants us to have an awesome life.
John 10:10 – The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill, and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.
God wants us, to take the time, to sit down and get to know Him. He wants us, to take the time, to sit down, and get to know Life. He wants us, to take the time, to sit down, and to get to know ourselves. Learning takes time. Learning takes effort. Setting up a user profile for your life may take a lifetime to do. Nevertheless/However, it will be well worth it, in the end.
Matthew 7: 7-8 – 7 Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: 8 For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.
The hour it took to set up my Dragon software was well worth it. Now, all I have to do is to start talking and the software will do the rest. Yet, setting up a user profile is never done. The software still needs to learn my voice so makes mistakes often. My job is to take my time, speak clearly, and correct the mistakes. The more time that I spend with my Dragon software, the easier things will flow, the less mistakes it will make, and the more clearly I will speak. Either way I win.
Relationships take time, especially new relationships. Re-establishing old relationships, also take time. The hard part is deciding to DO. Time to start doing. Time to start living. Time to start letting Life get to know you. Time to start letting God get to know you. Time to start letting YOU get to know you. Time to start letting the people that you love get to know you.
They need to hear from you. They need to hear your voice. You need to hear your voice. It has been closed off for a long time, now, hasn’t it? I’m sorry for that. It’s okay, though. It is, precious one.
You have imagined that Life wants to keep you quiet. Nothing could be farther from the truth, beloved. Life has been begging for you to speak up for yourself your whole life. Life has prodded to you, cajoled you, begged you, entreated you, beseeched you, to engage. To LIVE. It’s time, beloved.
You have imagine that God has wanted to keep you silent. Nothing could be farther from the truth, beloved. God has prodded to you, cajoled you, begged you, entreated you, beseeched you, to engage. To LOVE. It’s time, beloved.
you have imagined that your family and friends have wanted to keep you quiet. Nothing could be farther from the truth, beloved. Your family and friends want the best for you. They want you happy. They want you safe. They want to see you living your dreams. They want you to share your dreams with them. In short, they just want you to live and to love.
Don’t you think it’s time?
They need to hear your voice. God. Life. You. Your family. Your friends. New friends. Old friends. Your neighbor. Strangers.
They need to hear your voice. I need to hear your voice. Talk to me. Talk to us. Talk to Them.
Time to call on your friends Yikes, Egads, Reallys, SMHs, What-the-world-was-THAT!!?s and get to living.
You can do this thing called life. Go for it. You got this. I got you. God and Life has us all.
Why Can't I Be Loud?! 