Month: November 2021

Chili for Thanksgiving: Give yourself permission to BE.

Chili for Thanksgiving?

CHILI?!

For THANKSGIVING?!!

Yep, you heard correctly.

I have been pondering, wondering what to make for Thanksgiving. Thought of all the traditional meals and just could not land on one that sounded satisfying, this year. This year has been different. I have been different. So, I figure may as well DO something different for Thanksgiving.

For some reason, chili kept coming to mind. I shushed it away. Yet, chili came back round. Told, chili to go on head and kick rocks so I could think of an ACCEPTABLE Thanksgiving meal. For some reason, beloveds, well, chili just REFUSED to leave me be!

Chili: I want to be eating for Thanksgiving. Why does it matter WHEN you eat me? Aren’t I tasty, regardless of when sampled?

Me: Well, yea, but Thanksgiving has already been reserved for turkey, ham, and the like. NOBODY eats chili for Thanksgiving!…*gasp*…

Chili: Why can’t you start a new ‘tradition’ and have what your heart wants to have/eat?

Me: I’m not supposed to.

Chili: Says who?

Me: Hmm…*shrug*…have not the first clue. Just how Thanksgiving be, I imagine.

Chili: How about reimagining Thanksgiving? What would happen if you enlarged your thinking, opened your heart, to new experiences and let me come visit on Thanksgiving?

Me:…hhhm….brb…

*Cassandra heads for the kitchen and chili fixings*…

Me: Cya on Thursday!

Chili: YYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

*smells of chili, loud clanging, banging, and caterwalling going on as Cassandra sings awful badly to tunes whilst rustling up a delish pot of chili…for Thanksgiving.

Rejoicing still,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Life is short, beloveds. Try something new. Try something old. Try…something. Just get on up, get on out there and TRY. You got this. We got this. Together. Keep going. I love me some you. 😊

I laugh…still.

Today, was hard. Harder than the day before.

I laugh, still.

Today, I received some awful news. News tough enough to weakened seasoned knees.

I laugh, still.

Today, the void laughed at me. Told me my hopes, my dreams were but fool’s thinking.

I laugh, still

Today, I needed to hear mom’s reassuring voice. Only silence answered.

I laugh, still.

Today, each step I took appeared to take me farther away from the rest I seek. I kept walking.

I laugh, still.

Today, admonished me only heartbreak awaits my tomorrow. Tomorrow will do what it will. I remain in THIS day.

I laugh, still.

Today, I ventured out in hopes of capturing my rainbow. I received only storm clouds instead.

I laugh, still.

Today, my heart set out in hopes of making a friend. I returned, alone, again.

I laugh, still.

What of tomorrow, you ask?

What of it, I respond.

I laugh, still.

here still,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

I choose…still.

I choose…still.

I choose, to stand, still.

I choose, to love, still.

I choose, to care, still.

Circumstances, dealt me some cards I did not wish to play.

Still, I choose, I chose, to stand.

Situations, mocked me, laughed in my face.

Still, I choose, I chose, to love.

The world, told me my efforts were in vain, told me to pack up and get gone.

Still, I choose, I chose, to care.

God and Life, remained silent, as circumstances, situations and the world dealt, mocked, and laugh. Still, I choose, I chose, to stand, to love, to care.

God and Life ARE Faithful.

I am forever grateful.

I CHOOSE to remain:

Stedfast.

Unmoved.

Unapologetic.

Resolute.

Resilient.

Joyful.

Hopeful.

Loving.

And, in loving, I shall continue to choose to:

Receive.

Say.

Live.

Love.

And, in so doing, I SHALL be:

Loved.

Seen.

Heard.

Cherished.

Fought, for.

Cared, for.

Loved, by:

God.

Life.

Me.

Family.

Whosoever will.

Whosoever won’t…*shrug*.

Nevertheless and however, I choose…still.

here still,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

EVERY step closer is a step closer.

EVERY step closer is a step closer.

Closer to what?

You tell me.

Keep going, beloveds.

going with you,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

A daughter’s haiku. Part II

Thanksgiving is coming.

Closer still. Farther I remain.

Away, from you, mom.

😥

Yea, I know. I have completely broken the structure, the premise, the haiku.

Yet, I do so defiantly, triumphantly.

You see, I speak not only for me. But for other daughters who are missing moms. We feel, we ARE also broken, of structure, of heart for missing our mama, mum, mommy, mom.

I speak also, for sons, moms, dads, brothers, sisters, others. For all who feel disjointed, in need of the physical presence of a love, a loved one our faces shall never see this side of heaven.

I dare not say EVER. Ever is such an awfully big word, tonight. So, I choose to change the rules, in this MY haiku.

My heart understand. My heart cares not for structure, just now. My heart just wants to…

Ah, beloveds, this is the problem. My heart wants…

My heart wants…

My heart…wants.

left wanting,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

A daughter’s haiku.

Thanksgiving is coming.

Mom is not…

‘Nuff said.

*sigh*

Cassandra

Holidays are rough. Especially Thanksgiving. Mom was a holiday person. Today was hard. Wanted to stay in bed and comfort eat. Alas, the bills won’t get paid that way. So, I put on my big girl panties, turned on the lights, and got on with it.

Am waiting for the day to end. Want to crawl in bed and comfort eat. Sounds like a plan. Yet, think I will just talk a bit with mom, instead. Then, I shall rise, again, tomorrow, and go through another day, without mom. Hopefully, tomorrow will be easier than today.

Keep going, all. We got this. Even on the hard, I don’t want to do this days. We got this…

Uncle!

Ow. What a week this has been…

‘Nuff said.

Whew!

Cassandra

If at first you don’t succeed…

…say to hell with this and go watch Monday Night Football.

Success can go on head and delicately scoot a pebble or two along with…😜🤣😁🤷‍♀️

Some days…some days, it’s just best to grab a snack, zone out on some football or whatever catches your fancy, and try again tomorrow.

Remember, beloveds:

It’s okay if you are ok.

It’s ok if you are not.

Let NOTHING steal your:

Joy.

Hope.

Love.

Laughter.

ALL things really will work for your good as you allow God, Life, you, folks who care, folks who couldn’t give two damns, situations, circumstances and all manner of things to work in your life.

The tough times just reveal your awesome.

The awful days…heck the awful days are just awful. Next…

EVERY day has some goodness in it. EVERY one. Look for the nuggets. Look for the moments. We get one go around. Let’s make it a good one, eh?

Also, how awful could your day have been? You had ME in it. Hhmm, can see why maybe some may view this as a negative…🤷‍♀️🤣😜

I love me some you. Love me back wouldja please and thanks? It truly was sledding uphill ALL day.

Be well,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

System issues again!

Monday.

Again.

Didn’t we just do Monday?

What do you mean we have to do it again!?

WHAT!!!????

I barely scraped through last time! WHO says I have to?

Huh?

God and Life?

Hhmmm.

Can’t I just tell both discreetly to lightly kick a pebble or two or ten?

No?

Really?

Well, how about telling them we are having system issues at work, yet again!?

They know?

Really?

Well, dammit why are They not fixing my system issues this morning?!

Hell, why ain’t they done fixed ALL my issues?

AM TIRED OF GOING AROUND THESE SAME DAMNED FAITH MOUNTAINS ALREADY!!!!!

*Cassandra stamps foot and considers slapping some things around. Cassandra doesn’t feel like doing the day let alone cleaning up a temper tantrum*

What do you mean try something uplifting? The ONLY thing I want to uplift, at the moment, is a finger that may or may not be in the middle of a hand.

Go turn on some music and have a dance party?

He-…hhhmm….brb beloveds…*Cassandra turns up some music to chase the I could give two damns away*

💃💃💃

dancing STILL,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

P.S. Hang in there beloveds. Isn’t it fantastic to know we are loved in ALL our moods. It’s ok to get all up in yo feelings and feel what you feel. Just don’t take out the sunscreen and move into your Grimes. Life is good. Even with system issues. Yall don’t even go there about system issues!! Ackk…*Cassandra turns up the volume *

Live now: Eat the chili

The chili I made, the other day, came out perfect. Perfect I am tellin ya!🥰

I have one bowl left…*sigh*. This leaves me in a delicious quandary: Enjoy the last bowl, now. Savor the moment, save the moment and have for lunch tomorrow.

Hmmm…

HHMMM!

*Cassandra considers whether she she wax poetic, write endlessly about the joy of waiting, the awesome awesomeness of anticipation, the…*

Nah…brb…🤷‍♀️

🤣

Don’t judge me.

Psssst…LIVE now. Life is short. Besides there is ALWAYS bacon and eggs to fall back on!…*delicious shiver*😁

Have awesome week. We got this. God and Life has got us all. We got each other. We all we got but we all we need…

#YourLifeMattersToMe