Today was…egads today just WAS! You know?

All I wanted was to dive in bed and tell the entire world where to go and what all they could do when they arrived.

Yet, in leaning heavily upon God’s Word and His Deep and Abiding Love for me, I was able to reflect upon HIS Character, and not my soul-crushing fatigue.

The bible says that God’s yoke is easy, that His burden is light, as we LEARN of Him.

I thought of His Steadiness, as the storm raged.

I thought of His Goodness, when folks dismissed His Love and care. STILL, God loves.

I thought of His Grace, as people lashed out at Him through fear and doubt.

I thought of all these things and CHOSE to walk as He: I kept my needs quiet and extended care to others. I extended grace to those who were exhausted. I extended kindness to those who needed a kind word.

I did those things and had so much peace, joy and love left over that I decided to extend all those things to Him.

I made a bit of coffee, grabbed a double chocolate chip muffin and shared them with The King.

When work/life/situations have done their level best to get you off level, don’t fret. If you have done your all, be content.

Time to rest, beloved. Make a bit of coffee, snatch up the last double chocolate chip muffin and have a laugh with The King. He is waiting.

His,

Jaybird

Sometimes, you have to just say out loud “I got this”.

No one needs to come to your rescue to save you from the Yikes and Egads.

Remember, they are your friends. Rejoice when they come for you. Means you are launching out. Means you are trying new things. Means you are LIVING, in the MOMENT!

Yikes! Egads! Yasssss!💃😎

God and Life are trusting you with newness. With freedom. With…all manner of things, yall.

Time to stop running from icky feelings, tough things, scary things.

LIVE, beloved.

Living with you,

Jaybird 😱😁🤷‍♀️

Anyone can stand, when the sun is shining.

Anyone can give thanks, when their belly is full.

Anyone can be grateful, when love is afforded.

It’s when the rain comes, that knees are tested.

It’s when frustration comes calling, that joy is anxious to be used.

It’s when the No’s are the loudest, that peace reigns the hardest.

Whether we believe it or not, whether we feel it or not, whether we RECEIVE it or not, we are not alone. We are not defenseless.

Inside, it’s raining. Told God and Life to kick rocks, today. Told folks, to do their own heavy lifting, today.

Nevertheless, I stand. However, NOTHING can separate me from the Love of God.

I STILL win, feeling utterly defeated. Ha!

Jaybird ALWAYS

…I told both God and life, today.

Nothing uplifting today. Folks will need to do their own heavy life lifting today.

Nevertheless…

However…

Standing royally sucks, today.

…nothing went right?

Nothing FELT right?

Nothing looked right?

Have you ever had one of those days where…

…the thought of standing was exhausting?

Reaching out was exhausting?

Allowing someone to care seemed exhausting?

I had one of those days, today…*sigh*.

Nevertheless, I stand. Standing has NOTHING to do with feelings.

However, God understands how I feel.

I lean heavily on God’s Word, God’s CHARACTER and God’s Deep and Abiding Love for me.

I absolutely REFUSE to run away from the Yikes and the Egads of a difficult day.

I WILL NOT waste Dad’s Awesome Day. He created it just for me. I will NOT dismiss the beauty of the day trying to distract myself from the tough moments.

I embraced each and every Yikes. I rested and laughed at all of the days Egads. They were many. They were endless.

Nevertheless, they brought opportunities to humble myself and ask for help.

However, they brought triump mixed within defeat which added growth to a heart striving to learn.

Every Yikes, EVERY Egads led me yet another step closer to…*shrug *.

Does it really matter? I think not. Each step I took God and Life took with me.

Yikes. Egads. Awesome!😎💃

Jaybird STILL

I have been wanting to go for a long drive forever. Have been shut up and shut in for a year. A year and a half, in fact having started working from home October of 2019.

Working from home is fantastic. That said, working from home can make you lazy, if you let it. Everything is so CONVENIENT!

Anywho, I finally peel myself from my safe space and venture out.

Yikes! 😱 Did people ALWAYS drive this fast!?

Egads! Were these trucks ALWAYS this big and did they ALWAYS drive so close?!!

I don’t know which was going faster: my heart or those humungous, close driving trucks. Yikes. Egads.

I must confess to a bit of nervousness. Okay, spilling the tea, was nervous enough I initially forgot to stand. Flung myself in God’s Arms by blasting some fantastic praise music. Dad inhabits the praises of His Peeps dontchaknow?!

Yasss! 💃😎!!

I began wailing at the top of my lungs. Got to car dancing and rocking my ride…🚗. Rocking and wailing. Jamming with God and Life who got to jamming with me. I forgot to be nervous of them giant trucks. Forgot I had not done this in a while.

I turned my focus on being in the moment, in LIVING in the moment. Living, walking straight. Loving me some Him. Allowing Him to love some me.

Folks tend to run away from yikes and egads. They can feel icky. Okay they feel icky. Yet, if faced, acknowledged and processed can lead to AWESOME adventure/change/growth.

When life begins to happen and you get to feeling yikes and egads, don’t run. Sit with them. Poke them and prod them to shake what feelings they hold. They are trying to tell you something. Listen to them.

They may be telling you to go another way. They may be advising you to stay right where you are.

They may be encouraging you to get out of your comfort zone and to try new things.

They may be letting you know you need to get some act right for something you have said, done, have not said or have not done.

Embrace the yikes and egads. They are your friends. They are there for your growth.

Right now, I sit in the car still, waiting for my heart to stop racing. It races now in the excitement of an adventure lived, in the moment.

Yikes. Egads. Awesome. 😎

Jaybird

https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=rEp3-ATdJCQ&feature=share

Beloved, it’s time. Time for you to understand you have done your best. Rest and be encouraged. Life has been tough and has exacted quite the price from you.

It’s okay to take a breath. Okay to look around and wonder how you made it this far. It’s even okay to wonder if you will make it these next miles.

You CAN. You WILL.

Until you do, I got you. God and Life has you. How much safer/loved can you be?

It’s going to be okay. I promise it will. Rest now.

There were days where I honestly had no idea if I would stand and fight or give up completely.

There were many, many days when I had no clue where strength would come from. I tried to lift myself by the bootstraps. Life just booted me in the rear.

It was ONLY by letting go of…keeping it real, of the fear that God, that Life, that others would not have my back was I able to lean upon them, cry, wobble, cry some more, wobble some more, that I began the slow walk towards peace and healing.

Beloved, aren’t you tired of hiding, of fighting, alone? Those silent tears MUST be getting awfully heavy by now.

Aren’t you tired of fighting the darkness, the dawn, alone?

Know ye not that you are NOT alone? That God, that Life, weep seeing your silent struggles? They shout, from the heavens “You are not, alone. We are here. For you. FOR you”.

Let them in. Let folk care. FOR you. For YOU. You care for the world. All while bleeding deep inside.

The wounds WILL heal, beloved. As you continue to realize your worth, drop the mask, let loose of your cape, lower the moat and open your heart towards love and healing.

I shall live the rest of my days kicking down walls, scaling moats, snatching capes and loving as many of my sisters, my brothers and others who will allow.

It’s time, beloved. Long past time for your healing. If you are hurting and don’t know what to do, it’s okay. It truly is.

If you are hurting and just too darned tired of hurting and just want the hurt to not hurt anymore, it’s okay. It is.

If you are too angry, too confused, too whatever to reach out to God, to Life, to those who care for you, it’s okay. It really is.

If you are alone with no posse, no friends, no job etc, it’s okay.

I love and care for you. I will stand for you until you are able. I stand until you are ready.

Father, I pray for every person in need, this day. I pray for their hearts. I ask that You visit each and every hurting soul. I ask that You heal. I ask that You show Your Love for them in such a profound way they will NEVER doubt they are loved. Father, I ask that You show them Yourself with a crooked crown. In order that they may see Your Great Love for them and not see You as a Task Master. Dad, I ask that You stretch Your Arms wide and love those who feel unworthy. I ask for Your Grace, Your Comfort, and for Your Deep and Abiding Love to touch in such a way each heart reading these words will KNOW it was just for them. Finally, Father, I want to thank You, in advance, of working in folks hearts. I rejoice, NOW, knowing the healing is ALREADY taking place in the hearts, minds, and souls of all. Thank You for loving us, for loving ME. These things I ask, in Jesus Precious Name. Amen.

Receive these words, beloved. Receive this prayer.

Standing for all those too weary to stand,

Jaybird

I love you.

Rest, now, beloved. It’s time. Standing can be exhausting. Taking the high road, goodnight that can be soooooo exhausting. Nevertheless, it is imperative to stand. However, the high road is that good road you shall meet success, love, joy, peace, laughter, forgiveness, God, Life and so many other good things on!

It is easy to think life is all in the doing, only. Doing is important. Equally, important, is rest.

Work wants to run you into the ground. Wants to be a taskmaster. Work is forever reminding us there is work to do, already! Nevertheless, God says: Matthew 11:28-30 ²⁸Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. ²⁹Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. ³⁰For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

Rest, now. If you have given your all. If you have tried your best. If you have loved, best you can. Rest, then.

Rest, now. Give yourself a pat on the back. Give yourself a hug. You have spent your day making a difference. Who knows? you may have made THE difference for Life, today. Perhaps, Life shall let you know how much you have done.

Be encouraged, this day. You have done well. You have loved Life and tried to love others, the best you could. This world can be indifferent to those who give, who love, who tries. Nevertheless, keep loving, keep giving, keep trying. Your efforts are NOT in vain. However, it’s time to rest.

Rest now, beloved.

resting with you as we continue to stand….hehe….must stand always, peep,

Jaybird

Walk away, now.

Walk away, NOW!

WALK AWAY, NOW!!

These are the words that I spoke to my heart as I stood next to mom, for the last time. All the words had been said. All the rituals had been done. The tears had yet to run dry. Yet, it was time…*sigh*. Yes, it was time.

Walk away, now. Those steps were so hard. So hard. Reminds me of the steps I am taking now. A few more losses, to be walked through, to stand for, to lean heavily upon God’s Word, God’s CHARACTER and God’s Deep and Abiding Love, for me.

Last night, I cried. Nevertheless, I arose, today, hopeful for the future. Yes, I will grieve, today. However, I will remember all that these things, now lost, have brought to my life. I have grown much. I have loved much. I have lived quite a bit. Yet, all things really do come to an end. ALL things. Good and bad. Happy and sad.

It is easy to want to hang on, to hold on, to cling to people, places and things that have reached there end.

Walk away, beloved. Time to walk away. We were not meant to remain the same. We were not meant to hold on, forever, to past glories and defeats. We were meant to live, to thrive, to learn, to grow, to win, to learn, to endure. And, then, we were meant to move forward.

Walk away, NOW, beloved. Don’t wait. Remember the good times, reflect upon the tough ones and keep on moving forward.

Time to say goodbye, now….*sigh*.

Alas, I wanted to walk away, triumphant, having stood, and won over feelings of loss and sadness. However, I must keep it ‘100’ and admit that I feel as I did when I had to leave mom, that last time. KNOWING it was the last time….*sigh*. Words can not convey the sadness of leaving. KNOWING things would never be the same, knowing I would never be the same. I had no idea of who I would be. Just knew the me that I knew, she had to learn to stand, without mom, without her support, without her tummy to lay on when I was in need of some comfort.

I still catch myself with needing to leave her side. She is gone. Pain free. Yet, mine still remains. Walk away, I tell myself, on days when I want to go back to old things, old ways of thinking and being. Walk away, now. Mom would want you whole. She would never want you compensating and crooked. She would want you, standing, walking straight, leaning upon God’s Word, God’s CHARACTER, and God’s Deep and Abiding Love for me.

Another loss to prepare for, today. Nevertheless, I stand, I lean heavily upon God’s Shoulders. Tears slide silently down my cheeks as I steady myself to move forward. However, I do so with great joy and hope. I walk forward. I move forward. Nevertheless and However, I do not walk alone. Mom goes with me. God goes with me. Life goes with me. Those that I allow to support me go with me.

Walk away, now, God says. Everything has it’s season. Nevertheless, I go before thee to make thy way straight.

Walk away, NOW, Life says. Life was meant to be lived, moment by moment. It was never meant to be contained and hoarded. However, you wish to remain, in the past. The past is gone, beloved. Walk away, NOW. Live in the moment. Live in TODAY. Live, not survive.

WALK AWAY, NOW, I say through my tears. Stand, in THIS moment. Yes, this moment is hard. Yes, this moment hurts. But, it is so precious, so priceless to BE in this moment. No longer do I look ahead to see what this will be or if that one awaits me. I am content, living in this moment, even the letting go moment. I will miss this time. I will miss the relationships I must leave behind. I stand knowing that I am okay.

I’m okay, mom. I really am. I love you. With all my heart. I will see you again, mom. See your little girl, mom? She is trying, so very hard, to let you go and to fly free. I’m free, mom. I stand. I live. I thrive. I no longer survive, crooked and compensating. I have done the hard work, completed my physical therapy, and am making my way, straight.

As I walk away, I turn and wait for others to do the same…

Walk away, beloved. That relationship is done. That job is over. That situation has run it’s course. Time for you to move forward. Yes, it hurts to stand. Yes, it breaks the heart to leave behind precious things. Nevertheless, you can. However, you must. I walk with you.

walking and standing with you,

Jaybird

When I was at my lowest, when I sicker than sick, when I had little faith in myself, a friend said those words to me.

“You are enough…period”. I hung onto those words. At the time, I didn’t believe them. I felt as though I was letting down the ENTIRE world. Hard to feel great about oneself when one feels as though the are letting down the entire universe!….lol…*sigh*.

I don’t know who needs to hear these words, today. Yet, I share them, knowing there are folks who need to know they are enough…period. Something about the …period that snatches at the heart, right? The period. So, emphatic. So, definitive.

We kick the crapola out of own hearts, at times. We chide, deride and chastise our hearts, insisting that our efforts are meager, that our statures are small, that our love, sheesh, what of our love, anywho? Who needs it? Whose lives are we touching, changing with what we have, with what we bring, with who we are?

Great questions. Nevertheless, God’s Word and His CHARACTER, and His Deep and Abiding Love for you says: Isaiah 43:1-4 – ¹But now thus saith the LORD that created thee, O Jacob, and he that formed thee, O Israel, Fear not: for I have redeemed thee, I have called thee by thy name; thou art mine. ²When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee. ³For I am the LORD thy God, the Holy One of Israel, thy Saviour: I gave Egypt for thy ransom, Ethiopia and Seba for thee. ⁴Since thou wast precious in my sight, thou hast been honourable, and I have loved thee: therefore will I give men for thee, and people for thy life.

You are PRECIOUS to Dad. You are enough…period, and end of story! Rejoice. You be loved. We be loved, peeps!!!

YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

Be encouraged. It’s okay to not be okay. There will be times when, well, when our efforts won’t be a whole heck of a lot. We are human. We get tired. We go through things. There is too many things to do and not enough time, in our days it seems, to do them. We feel inadequate, out of sorts, nowhere near enough for what lies before us. That’s okay. Give what you can. Do what you can.

Do this KNOWING you are enough…period.

God loves us whether we present Him with a paper with a big fat ‘F’ on it. He loves us whether we pass Him a paper with an ‘incomplete’ on it. God loves us whether we hand Him a paper with a ‘you gotta be kidding me, right?’ 🙂

We be loved, peeps. We are enough…period.

‘Nuff said.

Jaybird

Ready, set, go! Live, don’t survive. Walk straight, don’t compensate and limp around, in too much pain to do the hard thing of physical therapy and healing. Keep on standing. Keep going…..I love you.