Month: October 2021

Keep moving.

There are days, weeks, months, even, when the LAST thing I prefer to do is to keep moving. Getting out of bed, is an effort. Making life, er, coffee, is an effort. Getting dressed, is an effort. Deciding what to eat for breakfast, is an effort. Having to eat, said breakfast, is an effort.

Effort.

Effort!

EFFORT!!

At times, good egads, life takes some much damned effort!

What’s worse, during those times, our want to, well, it just don’t want to….*shrug*….don’t blame it, though. I sure have wanted to, here lately.

How I have felt, however, is beside the point…*sigh*. I already feel my want to getting revved up to let me know that I HAVE to keep going.

Keep going.

Keep moving,

Keep believing.

Keep caring.

Keep trying.

Keep shouting into the damned void demanding it give us our hopes, dreams, healings, families, jobs, vacations, coffee, fried chicken, bacon(don’t judge me. I love me some bacon!), and all the manner of people, places and things we have been yelling into the void to and or for.

Exhausting, yall.

All this hoping, dreaming, believing, receiving, giving, waiting, LIVEing, yada, yada, rinse and repeat.

Yet, we gotsa keep it moving, we have GOT to keep believing, loving, trying, trying, trying,…whew….this living thing sure takes effort.

Effort.

Effort!

EFFORT!!!

My want to just don’t wannu!….*stamps foot*.

Today, now, this morning, just feels like a longer version of yesterday. And, yesterday took FOREVER to get the heck out of here. Good egads. I know. I know. Not supposed to just ‘endure’ our days. At times, though, I must admit that I grow a bit weary with all this effort of growing.

I also admit, I am enjoying ALL these steps. Even, the hard ones. Even, the boring ones. Even, the long ones. Even, the lonely ones. Each of them are revealing a new me, a better me, the original me that God and Life intended for me, in the first place.

The me BEFORE all hell had broken loose, on my life. Before I broke all the hell loose on my life. Before, others broke all the hell loose on my life. Hell! Crap!

Each and every time we keep on going, keep on moving, keep on believing, keep on loving, keep on receiving, keep on shouting into that damned void to give us our goods already, we grow.

We grow:

Closer, to the miracle called us.

Closer, to those dreams.

Closer, to all the healing.

Closer, to the love meant for us.

Closer, to one another as we continue to strive with and for one another.

Closer, to accepting ALL of ourselves. Not just the parts we think will be received and loved.

Closer, to God.

Closer, to Life.

Closer, to our friends.

Closer, to venturing out to making friends if we don’t currently have them.

Closer, to laughing at our mistakes. Knowing those mistakes are, in fact, revealing the greatness ALREADY locked deep insdie.

Closer, to our families.

Closer, to our venturing out to build a family if we don’t yet have one of our own.

Closer, to the knowledge that we know absolutely NOTHING and that’s okay.

Closer, to understanding we are so much more than our effort, what we do or don’t do, what we have or don’t have.

Closer.

Closer!

WE ARE GETTING CLOSER, BELOVEDS!!

Keep going.

Keep moving.

You CAN do this.

You WILL do this.

Tell defeat to go on ahead and kick some rocks. STOP kicking yourself for where you are not yet yet…lol.

Love yourself, today.

LIVE, today.

Love someone, today.

Let someone love you, today.

God and Life has your back. As do, I. In prayer for you and for me.

We got this.

Let’s get it!!

loving me some you,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Live!

https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=8v9V6oNGAvw&feature=share

Life is short.

We only get ONE go around.

No matter how it goes. We don’t get to learn lessons then get a do over.

The ONLY thing we have is THIS moment. We have no idea how many more moments we have.

Live.

LIVE!

REFUSE to live this life by barely scraping by.

REFUSE to settle for just settling.

REFUSE to give up.

REFUSE to waste even ONE more moment on distracting your way through life.

Tell defeat to:

Kick some rocks!

Tell fear to:

Take TWO seats.

Tell discouragement to:

Hey! What the world you listening to discouragement for????! Tell discouragement to kick rocks AND take the whole damned row!!

I mean it.

Get off your hind end and LIVE!

So, you failed? So, what!

So, this or that did not turn out that way or this way! So, what?!

So, the world said you couldn’t do it so you didn’t. So, damned what!?

How LONG are you going to punish yourself, others, by refusing to LIVE?!

Cry, if you must. Rant, if you must. Then, you MUST get off your hind end and…

LIVE!

‘Nuff said.

Get going, beloved. Life is waiting on you….

loving me some you,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Not gonna happen….*shrug*…

Nuff said.😜🤷‍♀️

🤣

Life is short. Celebrate your greatness.

Love someone, today, eh? You can start with me and keep it moving.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I crack myself at times.

Be well,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

I am.

I am.

‘Nuff said.

So, are you.

We don’t have to add, anything. We be fantastic all by ourselves. Just, as we are. Yes, we may not be, where we want to be, where we thought we would be, where we hope to be. Yet, we are:

Enough.

Again…

I, am.

So, are you.

Folks who can’t get with that can go kick some rocks, already!🤷‍♀️

Keep on doing and being you. As, ever, shall I.😎

We got this, beloveds. So, let’s get about getting it, eh?

Be well,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Embrace YOU!

Embrace YOU!

Yea, I’m talking to YOU. The you that you don’t allow others to see. The goofy YOU. The outrageous YOU. The serious YOU. ALL of YOU!

Time to get YOUR shine on. Time to own WHO YOU ARE.

God and Life are PROUD of YOU, beloved. Yea, YOU. The goofy you. The outrageous you. The serious you.

This world needs ALL of YOU. This world is in desperate need of those who are not afraid to….BE!

Be!

Be YOU!!

YOU are:

Amazing.

Spectacular.

Awesome.

Your life, matters. Your thoughts, matter. WE, this world, NEEDS your:

Hopes.

Dreams.

Daydreams.

Hope, beloved. Dream, beloved. Daydream, beloved.

YOU can do this. YOU will do this.

As will I.

YOU are amazing. As, am I.

Don’t let ANYTHING silence YOU.

Not:

Fear.

Not:

Words, said to you.

Words, said about you.

You ARE:

Amazing.

Necessary.

Required.

Beloved, stop looking around, in hopeless, wondering how things will change, if things will/can change and BE the change.

Open your heart, to others. Allow others, to open their heart(s), to you.

Your life DOES matter. If it did not, why the world, would the world, the enemy, circumstances, situations try and convince you that your voice is ‘just’ that. A voice.

Know ye not that ‘just a voice’ has, can and will continue, to change lives. Think of someone who changed your life, lifted your spirits with ‘just’ a kind word or two. Think of the folks who have been lifted, by YOU, by YOUR care, by YOUR words, by YOUR efforts.

You are changing EVERYTHING, simply by being YOU. The world paints success by how much folk have or don’t have. God and Life are ever shouting, to us all, it’s in how much we LOVE that is important.

How much we love ourselves. How much we love one another.

I stopped writing, for a bit. To take a break, yes. But, if I were to be 100, I would admit that I have asked myself what would be missed by my missing blogs? What do my words mean? By extension, what do I mean?

Am I, though, just words upon a page? And, if this be so, is this not something to be celebrated? I think so. I can not tell you how many joyous days I have experienced, reading the words of other bloggers. Their stories, their lives, have touched my heart, in more ways than I could ever begin to count.

I think of words written, to me, that have influenced me, decades after they were originally written. I have letters, tattered from being folded/unfolded, that lifts my spirits, still.

I think of God’s Words, inspired and written, many, many moons ago, that change me, daily. Words upon a page.

We, each of us, are ALL words, upon a page, upon this stage, this thing, we called life. Wars have started, because of words. Wars have ended, because of words. Amazing.

WE are amazing:

You.

Me.

All, of us.

Time to BE amazing, beloved.

Step into your uniqueness. Embrace, it. Embrace, YOU.

Lift your head, beloved. Don’t belittle or be ashamed of what you see. I see, greatness. God and Life sees, goodness.

Be, great.

Be, good.

Be, YOU.

Be, free.

It’s time, beloved, don’t you think? Time to stop hiding your precious heart. This world NEEDS you. God and Life NEEDS you. Your family NEEDS you. Your community NEEDS you. Yea, I’m talking to YOU!

You got this!

Fear, not. And, if you fear, so what? Do it, anyway. Be you, anyway. Don’t worry about being judged. I will tell you a secret:

Those ‘judgy’folk are not actually judging you. They see your boldness, your acting in spite of fear or absent fear. They see these things and are jealous, afraid, envious. So, they lash out. Be understanding, beloved, when this happens. For, they are truly really lashing out, at themselves. Judging, themselves. Hating, themselves. Love them. Keep being you. And, slowly, they may also find the courage to LIVE and walk as you.

YOU are, amazing.

I, am amazing.

Don’t be afraid to shine, beloved. Let your light, your life, your love, shine brightly. Many WILL be warmed, by YOU, should you find the courage to….BE.

BEing with you,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Acceptance.

Acceptance….*sigh*.

ACCEPTANCE!

A really, really, really tough word, at times.

Acceptance.

I have been doing my best, here lately, to accept the things I can do nothing about. It has NOT been easy. Yet, it has been worth it. Doesn’t always FEEL that way, though.

It is a very good thing that I make the choice, EVERY day, to walk by FAITH. NOT my feelings. NOT by how I think things should have gone, should go, need to go.

Things won’t always go MY way. In fact, things, here lately, have appeared to be going in the opposite direction! Ack!

I have lost some things, lost my mind a bit, about this situation and that. I have lost some ground, at work. Lost a family member, recently. I have lost more hair, gained more weight…*sigh*….

I have spent the week, in my undies, in the dark, in tears.

Why? Because, well, because life has been so blasted HHHHHHHHHHHAAAARRRDDDDDDDD these past few weeks. Normally, I have been able to take the ‘high road’. These past few weeks….whew….have wanted to tell the ‘high road’ to go ahead and kick some rocks!

I wanted to be angry. Had not allowed myself to BE angry. The other night, I ALLOWED myself to be angry. Allowed myself to be….BE…sad. I had a good cry. A great cry, in fact. I cried about many things.

I cried that I was STILL:

Alone.

Financially, strapped.

Alone.

Work stressed.

Alone.

Missing, my mom.

Alone.

Missing, my brother.

Alone.

Alone.

ALONE!

I was just feeling so damned ALONE, lately. Not, lonely. Just…

Just…

Just…

Alone.

So, alone, in the dark, in my undies, I had a good cry. Cried out, to God, to Life, to the universe, to the void. To any and all who would listen.

Cried and wanted.

Wanted and cried.

What did I want?

I wanted to be:

Loved.

Seen.

Heard.

Needed.

Yea, I NEEDED to be needed, know what I mean?

I emailed a friend, and said all I have ever really wanted was to be CHOSEN. To be chosen so I could be love and I could love. Someone. Many someones. I felt sad. Feeling as though I have never really been chosen. Not in the manner I THOUGHT I should be, thought I WOULD be.

Yet, had I ALLOWED folk in? Enough to get to know me enough to choose me? Or, did I only show the parts I thought would be acceptable and therefore ACCEPTED?

IF I were to be, completely honest, I would admit that I had done more ‘work’ to earn love, favor, respect, care, etcetera. I gave all of that, hoping the ME that I was, the ‘other’ parts of ME that were not so shiny/beautiful/lovely would be, well, accepted, along with the hard work, the care, I had given.

Was that fair? To, others? Was that fair, to ME? Probably not. What’s more, had I not been chosen? Many times? Yet, had I possibly, backed away, ran away, dashed away? In, fear. The fear of not being ‘enough on my own?

Without:

My, work.

My, efforts.

My, gifts.

My, talents.

My, money.

Acceptance…*sigh*. I can accept the fact, now, that I had hid my heart, then. And, now, I am paying for that hiding, from way back when, back then.

Knowing this, I can be patient, as I accept that change does NOT happen overnight. Friendships take time, to build, to mend, to breathe, to grow. Relationships take time, to find another, to learn another, to receive another, to grow another.

Knowing this, I accept this time alone. I can use my alone, now, to prepare for not being alone, soon, later, whenever.

Knowing this, I can forgive the ME I was then. I can tell that ME I had done the best I could do, at that time. Yet, I am a different ME, now. Rather, I am the ME Life and God and circumstances and time and people and places and….and…and are helping to build ME to be.

I can accept this.

I DO accept this.

Acceptance.

ACCEPTANCE!

The word, now, feels triumphant. Now. Before, the word, acceptance, seemed like, FELT like a ‘victim’ word. Felt like surrender. Surrender, felt like such a cowardly place/position to be in.

I have learned, however, surrender is one of THE most powerful words, one of the most powerful positions, one could find oneself. ONLY someone truly strong can surrender. You see, it takes letting go of fear, letting go of pride, letting go of ALL we hold dear, in order to truly surrender ourselves, our positions, our this and our thats.

In order to TRULY love, as love demands, we have to give up OUR desires and replace them with the desire of the heart we have given our love to. The bible says this about love:

 I Corinthians 13: 1-7: Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. 2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.

4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

When we love, we have to accept, ah, there that word goes again, we may not be loved, in return. Love accepts this fact and continues to love. In full surrender.

In knowing this, I can accept loving ME, now, fully and completely and honestly. I can accept that God loves me, fully and completely and honestly. I can accept that others may or may not love me, fully and completely and honestly.

I can live with this knowledge. I accept it. I CHOOSE to receive whatever may come, my way.

Love? Here I am. Something else? Depends on what the ‘something else’ is….hahahahahahahaha!!

In the meantime, I am living, in the NOW, in the present. I accept that I have not always done my best. Yet, I tried. The outcome, now, is I am alone, now. Will that be forever? Who knows. I enjoy being alone, most days. I get a huge kick out of me. I get a kick out of acting a fool, in my undies.

What’s more, I have NEVER been alone. God has ALWAYS been close by. Waiting. Loving, me. Rooting, for me. Waiting for me to see, learn and KNOW that He has been close by, this whole time.

Now, right now, I kick it, with Him, whilst waiting for another, for others. Will they come? Who knows? God does and He ain’t telling. 🙂

Acceptance.

Ah, such, a beautiful word! Such, a freeing word. Such a giving word.

I, accept ME. I, accept the uniqueness, of life. Of MY life. I may not be everyone’s cup of tea but God and Life sure enjoy my flavor! Knowing this, I am all good. The rest of the world, well, yall missing out. I am some good people.

Life is short, beloveds. Time to accept the facts:

You, be loved.

You, are NOT alone.

You, are awesome.

So, get on out there and BE.

You.

Unapologetically.

Life is short. We only get one shot at it. Get on out there and live. Broken pieces and all. With ALL that you have. Give and it SHALL be given back to you.

In the meantime, you got you some me. How great is that??!

loving me some you,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Hey YOU?

Hey.

Hey?

Hey!

You.

Yea, I was talking to YOU!

The YOU that has been weary. The YOU that has been on the verge of:

Giving up.

On:

You.

Your, hopes.

Your, dreams.

Your (fill in the blank).

You got this.

Did you hear me?

Did you HEAR me?!

You got this, beloved.

You CAN.

You WILL.

You just have to keep it moving, beloved. Beloveds.

No matter the hard. No matter the what. No matter the way.

It doesn’t matter.

One foot, in front of the other.

Just ONE, beloved.

You can do this.

You can DO this thing, called life.

Don’t give up.

Not, yet.

Not, now.

Not, on you.

Not, on Life.

Not, on God.

Not, on your family.

Not, on your friend(s).

Not, on your job.

Not, yet.

A little longer.

Just, a bit longer.

How long?

Doesn’t matter.

The matter is that YOU matter and that you continue to matter and care about the thing that TRULY matters.

Which leads me back to the beginning…

Hey YOU?

Yea, I was talkin’ to YOU!

Lift up your head.

Straighten your back.

Reach out your arms.

RECEIVE what IS coming for you:

Love.

Joy.

Peace.

Hope.

New Beginnings.

They are ALL for YOU.

YOU deserve them.

YOU deserve to be loved.

Why?

Because you are. 🙂

This is YOUR time.

I pray for you.

I rejoice for you.

I love you.

You are my people. I am yours. Time we all come together, in love, dontcha think?

Give some YOU away, today. Someone needs the love that only YOU can share from that precious and priceless heart of yours.

YOU can do this.

YOU will do this.

His and yours,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

P.S. If my life matters to you, let me know. EVERYONE needs their love tanks filled. I try to fill folks, on the daily. If you ‘like’ a sista, how about start talking to her? She has been waiting. Bring a friend. Let us give to one another, eh? Silent readers are great. Loud readers requested. BE loud with me, okay beloveds?

Caution!

This meme ALWAYS brings a smile, to my face.

Mostly, because it’s true!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH!!

I am:

Good people.

A goof.

Sometimes, a moron.

ALWAYS, trying.

I believe:

In, God.

In, Life.

In, myself.

In, people.

I KNOW:

ALL things truly DO work, for my good. Especially as I allow them to.

I am so:

Hopeful, for the future.

Joyful, in my present.

Grateful, for my past.

ALL things helped to make me, well, ME!

I think that ME is:

Delightful.

Wonderful.

Deeply loved, by God.

Deeply loves, God.

Ridiculously, talented.

I:

Love me, some me.

Love me, some you.

Love me, some Life.

Love me, some Jesus.

I believe in:

Me.

Love.

Life.

God.

You.

I will keep on loving some:

Me.

You.

Life.

God.

I hope:

Folk will ALLOW themselves to be:

Loved.

Loved.

Loved.

Loved.

Loved.

Loved.

By:

God.

Life.

Me.

Themselves.

Their, families.

Their, fellow man.

Again, I say…

CAUTION!

loved and loving,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

P.S. Okay, so how can you NOT be loving you some me, right now??!….hehe….life is good. Hang in there, beloveds.

Nuff said…

The week is at it’s end.

You have done your all.

You have given all you have to give.

You have lived your best life, in the best way you know how.

You have taken the high road, ALL week, when you have wanted to tell folks to go kick some rocks, already!

It is enough.

YOU have DONE enough.

Time to:

Rest.

Reflect.

Relax.

The world will do what it will. God and Life has got ALL under control. Thanks, in part, to your faith, your love, your effort, your TRY.

Enjoy your weekend.

Give yourself the pat on the back you richly deserve.

KNOW, of a surety, your voice matter, your thoughts matter, your hopes and dreams matter.

You are:

Loved.

Cherished.

Prayed for.

Fought for.

EVERY day. Every one.

Be at peace.

His and yours,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe