Hard left, this morning. I was surprised. I thought she was here, to stay. At the very least, I thought Hard would be with me. For the foreseeable future, and beyond.
This morning, though, over coffee and conversation, Hard abruptly announced it was time. Time, for her, Hard, to go. I was flabbergasted. We were just in the middle of a long laugh. About what? I don’t even remember now. We had been digging our way out of this mountain of grief and who gives a damn. I had dug up a really stupid song. One that made us both laugh. What was the song? You know, I don’t even remember. Just remember laughing, during the hard, with Hard. And, laughing, hard, still.
I couldn’t believe this heart could laugh, still. After a time, we grew tired. Hard and I. Decided to rest, just a bit. I made coffee. Offered to share, a cup. Hard, accepted. We, sat. We, drank. We, laughed.
Suddenly, Hard arose. Arose and said it was time for her to go. She left me with gifts I will always cherish. Said not to tell you, just yet, what those gifts are. She may be visiting you, sometime, and want you to discover the gifts for yourselves.
Before she left, she turned, made her way back to me. She, Hard, placed her hand, gently, upon my tired shoulder. Gave said shoulder a squeeze, leaned in and said three words. Words said, Hard closed the door and was off on her next assignment.
To my amazement, I found I missed her. Just a bit. Working with the hard, with Hard, I dug out so much more of me. Me has been nice to see. Now, I find myself trying harder, working harder, loving harder, striving harder. Why? To make Hard proud. I am no longer resistant of the hard, of Hard. I, embrace it. I, receive her.
As this day ends, I prepare for the evening’s embrace. I have been about it, given my all, ate my peas and carrots, emptied my cup, best as I could. I am letting that be enough.
As I go, I shall tell you the three words Hard said to me. They are the same I would say to you:
You got this…
Cassandra
#YourLifeMattersToMe
- THE HAND FROM HEAVEN ✋🏾☁️🧻🤣
- COME SIT AT MY TABLE 🪑❤️🩹
- BELOVEDS, YOU CAN HAVE MY FLOWERS. I DON’T NEED THEM ANYMORE.
- Forgive them, Cassandra, God said to me
- Still In Love
Why Can't I Be Loud?! 