Yet, they have been awfully lovely as I have been loving folk, best as I can, with absolutely no fear.
I, am no longer afraid, of:
Not, being loved back.
Being, misunderstood.
Folks, questioning my motives.
Being, rejected.
Being ignored.
Folks, responding with anger, disdain and all the other emotions hurt folks tend to respond to genuine displays of affection with.
Yes, those things hurt. I am human. The human heart was built to be love and to love.
Through the love of God, of Life, of family, of friends, and myself, I have learned to keep it moving no matter what, no matter why, no matter who.
I have ALWAYS loved words and people. Even as a young child. I was born this way. 🤷♀️
It’s why I wake up wondering if folks I have never met are okay.
It’s why I end my evenings hoping those same folks had a good day and asking God and Life to look after them. Even the ones who wish I’ll for folk who look like me.
Those folks I especially ask God to love and help and bless. Must be difficult to carry so much ill will in your heart for folks simply because they don’t look like you or act like you or feel like you. Lord, please help them. They really know not what they do. Bless them. Help me to understand that folks just don’t understand.
My heart is so full now, absent the fear!
Amazing……(((((((((hugs self)))))))))).
I so wish I could scoop out some of this fearless love, and give it to you, beloveds, so you can also know this breathless wonder and joy even in the midst of heavy times.
The awesome news beloveds is that you can also experience loving without fear.
How?
Love.
Love, afraid.
Love, embarrassed.
Love.
Rinse.
Repeat.
After a while, the I feel like a complete idiot feeling will pass. The I feel like a moron feeling will fade. The what in the fresh hell am I wasting my time for will always pop up now and again but you tell that feeling to go on ahead and kick some rocks and keep on loving.
One day, I promise, beloveds, you will wake up, amazed that you honestly are no longer afraid to love.
Life is so short. None of us know how many days we have to love one another. Yet, the whole world has lost it’s collective minds over a slap heard around the world.
It’s time for the gavel to come down, beloveds. Time to stop judging folks actions, motives and just love them. Period.
We are ALL flawed, nuanced human beings. Whoever and whatever we call ourselves let us love, one another.
Without, fear.
Without, judgment.
Without, limits.
Without, conditions.
I love you.
Yes, I, Sweetpea, love YOU?
Why?
You are part of my global family. Families fight but they ought love one another, don’t you think?
I pray for you.
I ask for the best for your life and those in your life.
I shed tears, of joy, that soon you shall experience this AWESOME joy of loving for the sheer pleasure of caring for another human soul.
There are so many family I can no longer love, on this earth.
There are friends, now acquaintances, or no longer even that that I still miss, terribly, and wish them well and wish that they knew how much I love them, still.
Easter, is coming.
Last Easter, my heart was full of lamentation for a world seemingly grown cold with hatred, divisiveness and fear.
This year, in THIS year, all my heart longs to do is love folk as long as I can til this heart beats no more.
Easter, is coming.
Love, wants to come for you.
Let, Love in.
Life, wants you to live life, to LIVE, to the fullest.
Let, life in.
Be encouraged,
Sweetpea STILL
as always beautifully written, beautifully spoken beautifully sister…..your journey is far from over . ❤️
That reminder to stop trying to prove ourselves and just set down the weight of guilt is so deeply comforting.…
I am doing my bestest, my darndest, to be about it and make everything around me as beautiful as I can make it.
How about you?
The world, currently, is in an uproar over one man who put his hands on another man.
I choose to extend my hand(s), my heart, my shoulder, my care, my love, my prayers, my friendship, to this world, best as I can, for so long as I have breath.
I extend, first, to you, beloveds. I then, reach out, or try to, reach for the rest.
Help me, beloveds. I can’t get to them all.
Help, me.
Help, someone else.
Love them, beloveds. Folks need you to love them.
ALL of them.
Even, the pigheaded ones.
The, wrong ones.
The, dumb ones.
The, old ones.
The, young ones.
The, on the opposite side of the fence onces.
The, on the opposite ends of the earth ones.
The, on the other side of the track ones.
It doesn’t matter, who, beloveds.
Just LOVE someone.
Folks ain’t clothes, you know.
We ain’t no color to choose.
We ain’t no size to select.
We ain’t no object to be bartered with.
We are a whole collections of what in the fresh hell and none of us know what the wide world we are doing folks who are trying their level best to make it through a world that don’t make a hill of beans sense.
*shrug*
No matter.
Love them, still.
Love me, still.
Love you, still.
What the world you waiting on, beloved(s)?!
Yea, I am talking to YOU!
Stop, waiting on me, on others, to fill you. Grab a bucket and get to filling up someone else.
In refilling another, in refilling others, God and Life will fill you so full you won’t be able to hold the excess and will have to drip all that love onto another, and still others.
Reach down, beloveds, take the rock, from your shoe. Hold onto it, as a momento, of the hard day(s), the long walk, the end of a struggling, a long road.
You can do this.
I am proud of you, beloveds. So very proud.
Look, around you.
Claim, your victory.
In, advance.
It is surely yours.
You have, and are, learning/have learned the meaning of the fight.
The fight, is besides the point.
It is what the fight, takes out of, and returns back to, the fighter.
MEOW!
ROAR!
Uh, oh, world, seems like you have woken up both the kitty, in me, AND, the tiger!
Time, to stop scraping your way through your days.
Time, to stop hiding from yourself.
Time, to stop hiding from life.
Get on out there, beloveds, and LIVE. Grab someone’s hand and take them with you. Dance, for someone, who can’t yet dance. Sing, for someone, who can’t yet sing. Rejoice, for someone, who can’t yet rejoice.
And, don’t feel bad, if currently, you are on the side of those who can’t yet. Someone shall be along for you, shortly. In the meantime, meow, just a lil bit, would you please and thanks.
I have decided to do me, today. Just going to keep doing what I have been doing, for the past 14 plus hours…praying for you, chair dancing in the dark, praying for you, praying for the world, praying for me, crying for every heart that is broken and in need of care, crying out for every heart that is broken and in need of repair. Rinse. repeat.
Until, those hearts are healed.
Then, once healed, can live the life they were meant to. In the meantime, will pray grace for those same hearts KNOWING they can, still, live the life they were meant to, broken, battered, bruised heart and all.
Keep, going.
I go with you.
God and Life goes with us all.
Take really good care of that heart of yours. There is only ONE you. Just one. A priceless soul. A worthy soul. a cherished soul, a seen soul, a loved soul, a cherished soul, an honored soul.
loving me some you,
Cassandra aka Sweetpea
#YourLifeMattersToMe
as always beautifully written, beautifully spoken beautifully sister…..your journey is far from over . ❤️
That reminder to stop trying to prove ourselves and just set down the weight of guilt is so deeply comforting.…
Sometimes, beloveds, in order to gain everything, we must be prepared to lose it all, to give it all.
At times, life extracts the last full measure from us. In order to:
Reveal, to us…
Remove, from us…
Our, fear.
ALL, fear.
This is why, beloveds, God and Life, seemingly sits idly by, while we:
Lose, it all.
Win, it all.
What, shall/have, we, lost/won?
What, shall/will, we, see as gain, as loss?
Ah!
Ask, beloveds.
You may be surprised by the answer.
Fear, not.
Your, ask, your very act of asking, IS your answer. Your, ticket.
To:
Freedom.
From:
Fear.
Whose fear, you ask?
Aha!
You, are getting closer!
Keep, going.
Keep, asking.
Asking who, you ask?
You, are almost there!
To be continued.
Things are not as they appear to be, in your life, around your life, beloved.
Look, around.
All the losses, you have suffered, in the past, in the present day, have NOT been for naught. They have, they are fulfilling the purpose, for your life.
These losses, will be your net gain.
For, they are revealing the purpose, revealing your purpose, in your life, for your life.
For, your life, was also meant to help God, to help Life, to fulfill the purpose of someone, of many someone(s) life/lives.
Your, loss.
Their, gain.
Full, circle.
We, love, because He, FIRST loved/loves us!🥰💃
YYYYAAAAAAAASSSSS!
It is why, I rejoice that I have fought the night, ALL night, lost and yet have already won.
The night, can have it’s spoils.
I await, the coming dawn.
I await, to seize the day.
I write these words of victory, in the middle of incredible loss, heartache and lack.
Laughing, crying, rejoicing KNOWING that all is NOT lost.
Yes, I have lost some dear friends on these past months, even in the past days.
Yes, I have lost financially, losses I can not recover, make up for, see my way out of, alone. Yet, I am alone. Yet, not.
Yes, I suffered a professional loss. In the midst, lost my pride, lost my fear of speaking truth to power, lost my fear of losing my job, lost my fear of failure/success.
The outcome(s). of all my losses, have still yet to be determined.
I have, determined, and, I have learned that the outcome(s) are besides the point.
Real talk, beloveds, I am having a hard time finishing this piece. My humanity, it seems, is getting in my way. The remaining words are there. But, I’m tired. I spent the day yesterday, in tears. Worked, through tears. Wrote, through tears. I told a friend, yesterday, that I was TIRED of fighting through, struggling with, so many losses. Preparing, for more loss.
The dawn, is almost here. Ready to deliver yet another day to be fought through, and to be lived. I’m exhausted, still, from the night that still lingers.
How can/will I get through this coming day(s)? I have NO idea. It is this distraction that is keeping me from ending this piece in a life-affirming crescendo.
I pass the keyboard, and my heart, to you for you to finish this piece. I shall end here and wait for your answer(s).
Whatsoever state you find yourself in, beloveds, live, dammit!
Live!
Now!
Here!
Afraid.
Fearless.
Fretful.
Full.
Empty.
Nevertheless…
However…
For, in the meantime, the minutes, the hours, the weeks, the months, the years, the decades, pile up until you look around and not much of you,of life, is left.
Live now, right now, right here, not in spite of life, not despite life, not fearing life, not waiting for life and making due in the meantime.
Live, now, right now, in the moment, not in the meantime.
Why Can't I Be Loud?! 
as always beautifully written, beautifully spoken beautifully sister…..your journey is far from over . ❤️