Today was hard.
Why?
Because it was the same as yesterday.
Tomorrow’s are piling up and turning into too many yesterdays that did not come bearing my dreams.
I find these days, THESE days, harder and harder to bear minus said dreams coming ’round.
I can hear doubts laughing outside my front door. So what. they be OUTSIDE no longer allowed in my home, in my heart, in my mind, in my dreams.
Thank goodness for hope. Hope pays me no mind and barges in whether I want to welcome her or not. She brings joy with her and they cause such a racket I can’t help to awaken from my slumber.
*sigh*
Longing is sooooooooo loud and has been sooooooooo insistent I can barely restrain her. She is no longer satisfied with yet. ONLY yes will do now. I don’t know what to do with longing, with THIS longing.
Perhaps, if age had not reminded me that life was short I may have been able to ignore longing.
I find age and longing peering at me, askance. They both want to know what I am going to DO? They both want to know WHEN dreams are going to show up. See, age and longing have things to do, places to go and people to see.
They won’t share with me who, what, when, where or why. Age and longing just keeps telling me to hurry up and be about being about it.
*sigh*
All I can promise them is I will ask God and Life, tomorrow. Day already took everything with her.
Today, was hard. I cried on The Father’s Shoulder. He understood. He understands. He did not promise that dreams would come a calling tomorrow.
He DID promise to be there, in tomorrow, waiting for me. He gave my shoulder a final squeeze, slid me gently off His Lap and encouraged me to keep going. He said He was proud of my try. He told me not to worry about the outcome, or lack thereof.
Keep going, God said.
Aite, I replied.
We both laughed.
I forgot to be sad, again.
hopeful still,
Cassandra
#YourLifeMattersToMe
- COME SIT AT MY TABLE 🪑❤️🩹
- BELOVEDS, YOU CAN HAVE MY FLOWERS. I DON’T NEED THEM ANYMORE.
- Forgive them, Cassandra, God said to me
- Still In Love
- REAL TALK: DESPISE NOT SMALL BEGINNINGS, BELOVEDS.👘🦺🥾👟🥿👞🩴👢🩰👡⛑️🔌🕯️🔎🖌️🖋️📢
Why Can't I Be Loud?! 