Ow.
Oww!
Life has been hurting. Bad. I think it’s because Mother’s Day is sneaking up on me.
I tell myself I will be okay, this year. This year, I won’t miss mom as much as the year before.
Ha!
I miss her more.
Every day.
EVERY day!
Fresh hell.
Dammit, mom, WHY DID YOU LEAVE ME ALONE!!
*stamps foot*
*smile*
I think I miss her so because the NBA Playoffs have started and Lebron James is playing against Stephen Curry. Mom, was a Kobe and Lebron man. As for me and mine, my basketball heart belongs, openly to Steph. Don’t tell mom but secretly I also root for Lebron and Kobe was sublime!
Mom and I, me and mom would call each other carrying on about them.
“Did you SEE what Steph did, mom!?”
“Girl, did you SEE what Lebron did!!?”
When games were on, I didn’t have to check the caller ID. Would just pick up the phone hollering…lol.
Since mom passed, Christmas morning, 2016, I have not been able to watch much. This year, I told myself I would try and enjoy the games, again. Mom would want me to.
Yesterday, Lebron and The Lakers took down Steph and The Warriors. I wanted to snatch the phone and get to hollering at and with her.
*sigh*
I did the next best thing. I crawled upon The Father’s Lap and told Him how very much I missed my mom. I asked Him how long it would be before my dreams came true? I asked if I would ever find some true homies that would call me, on the regular, just to see how I was. I talked to Him about concerns of growing older, alone. I let Him know I could use some Jesus with skin on.
I told Him where it hurts the most. Most folk put on airs with Him and only talk to Him about their triumphs. They are terrified to seek Him out when they are hurting or think they have messed up.
There is nothing more comforting then knowing we are loved no matter what. I pray more folks come to realize how short life is and that they will climb onto The Father’s Lap and give all their heartaches to Him.
No matter what!
Ah…*hugs self*
*Cassandra climbs down from The Father’s Lap then goes in search of her mom, who was probably shooting the breeze, pain-free with Jesus*
Hey, mom, guess what Lebron did last night!!🥰
taking the last shot and laughing at her mom,
Cassandra
#YourLifeMattersToMe
Note: Too often, folk are afraid. Afraid, to show their heart to others for fear they will be rejected. Too many, are terrified to be alone, for fear of what their heart may say to them. Too many times, folk are afraid to look up and reach for the arms of The Father, for fear He will look upon them with judgement, indifference or disdain.
Beloveds, you are beautiful. Lift up, your head. Look and SEE how much you ARE loved. You are. It’s okay. He understands. He knows where you hurt. He just wants to love you. ALL of you. Yes, He wants to help you grow and get some act right and rid you of all the folks and things that can and will hurt you.
Yet, He knows things takes time. Be good to you. Let go of those things and people that are not in your corner. If the folks, in your life, do not have the largest pom poms and loudest voices shouting for your victory…*shrug*…
Let them go, beloveds. Wish them well, then let them go. If a situation is not helping you to grow, let it go. You have done your best. If YOU have done things or have not done things that have kept you from getting where you have longed to go, let it go and begin again. You got this. God has us all.
- THE HAND FROM HEAVEN ✋🏾☁️🧻🤣
- COME SIT AT MY TABLE 🪑❤️🩹
- BELOVEDS, YOU CAN HAVE MY FLOWERS. I DON’T NEED THEM ANYMORE.
- Forgive them, Cassandra, God said to me
- Still In Love
Why Can't I Be Loud?! 