My dad was tough on us.
We were supposed to get straight A’s. And, not just A’s. Where were the A+’s?!
We were supposed to be good in sports. Better than the boys even.
We were supposed to work harder than everyone else. You are too young to be tired ever?!
We were supposed to be seen but not heard. Why aren’t you speaking up?!
We were supposed to be grown even as children. Don’t cry! Why are you asking for that?!
Mom loved us but didn’t know how to SHOW/EXPRESS her love. She showed her love through her meals. She showed her love through cleaning. She showed her love through service to her church and every person in need.
The church taught us to keep our feelings to ourselves and ‘let go and let God’ without showing us what to let go of or HOW to let go.
Employers have taught us to keep it shut and do as we are told to earn a paycheck and not worry how we are going to retire. IF we are ever able to retire.
Add ALL these things together and you have one big ball of not knowing how to rest, dream or enjoy just being us.
Geeeeeeeeeeeeeeez.
My family, I suspect, is much like the family of every other family out there. Expectations. Expectations. Expectations. Placed upon us by everything and everyone. Leaving us little to…*shrug*.
I finally found the courage to admit I am NOT strong. I am human. I can’t always get the highest grades. I can’t always beat the menfolk. I can’t always be at the head of the class.
I am more than those things, my heart shouts within me!
I am more.
I AM MORE!!
Aren’t I?
Aren’t you?
Aren’t we?
There is so much more I wish to do. That said, am I not enough if I never do those things?
I have never felt so weak. What a relief. I’m giving myself permission to NOT be strong. I don’t have to be strong. Not all the time.
I have been allowing my family and my friends to experience me in my vulnerableness. Before I only allowed folk to see me when I was at my strongest. ALL the time. How exhausting. SMH.
I plan on spending the rest of my days encouraging folk to be as weak as they need to be. We don’t have to be strong all the blasted time.
We can say ow when life hurts.
We can say kick rocks when The Universe is continually shoving hard down our throats.
We can say enough already when Life keeps telling us to take the blasted high road EVERY blasted time!
I am not strong.
Yet, I am more.
So are you.
being weak and that’s okay,
Cassandra
#YourLifeMattersToMe
Note: Nuff said. Give yourself permission. Asking for A Friend.
One step.
One step.
One step.
You are loved.
You are NOT alone.
Keep on being…YOU!
- THE HAND FROM HEAVEN ✋🏾☁️🧻🤣
- COME SIT AT MY TABLE 🪑❤️🩹
- BELOVEDS, YOU CAN HAVE MY FLOWERS. I DON’T NEED THEM ANYMORE.
- Forgive them, Cassandra, God said to me
- Still In Love
Why Can't I Be Loud?! 