Looking beyond the suffering: Feed someone else.

Writing 2 Minutes

I admit it. Off top. Full disclosure. Had someone said to me, yesterday, these self same words I am about to share with you, today, I would have wanted to bop them one.

At the very least, would have wanted to dump two pounds of uneaten chili upon their Pollyanic head!

That said, the words have merit. Just, barely…lol.

Since my friend passed away, seems like my taste buds left with her. Or, my taste for life in general.

Or rather, the generalness, the sameness, the same stuff different day randomness of life has lost it’s appeal for me.

I want to KNOW what the point is to these words that God, that Life, that ME are always so damned fired up to share and impart.

What are the use of them!? What the hell use God, Life, of this old life called me? Why, did you leave me with much more when you took one so damned young away!!!!!!!!!!? Am angry about it. Still.

Her loss has my life seeming to be tasteless. Nothing tastes good. Nothing.

So, I sit here. Daily, wondering how to continue to chew on this tasteless thing called the rest of my life.

Too much fight in me, I find, for me not to fight.

Too much hope, in me, I find, for me not to be hopeful.

How, I ask God, I ask Life, do I find myself, still, looking ahead, looking towards, looking for, when such a blow has rendered my want to inoperable?

Yes, gotsto has to taken over, now. Gotsto made me get up and get out. Gotsto made me go through some do I have tos until I gotto the place of almost wanting to.

I found myself, texting a friend and asking if I could bring them some food, if I could grab a quick hug and then go. Not ready, no not yet, to be about being about it.

The ride was nice. Sun, shining. Music, blaring. My heart, sang. I admit. It shouldn’t have. Yet, my heart sang.

Hopeful.

Joyful.

Knowing it was on it’s way, to feed someone, which in turn, will feed me.

Food, delivered. Hug, given and received. Satisfied, my hunger subsides.

Subsides until, I find myself in need of another hug, some caring words, a shoulder, time spent being ministered to instead of ministering.

Until then, I shall continue to look for someone else who may be in need of a bite, for a bit of love, for a bit of care.

Chili, anyone? I make a great pot, if I do say so myself.

Here STILL,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

P.S. There are times when life is just not fair. There are times when we want to just say to hell with it all and leave all to where ever the hell it goes. There are times when life is tasteless. Yet, life is STILL good. Even when hard. If your plate is tasteless now…🤷‍♀️…that’s okay. Look beyond it. There IS joy and hope beyond ALL that you face. There is. We shall enjoy chili again. In the meantime, I have switched to chicken salad.🤣

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Published by Cassandra S.

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4 thoughts on “Looking beyond the suffering: Feed someone else.”

  1. Well crap! How can I give up now? Crimeny. Was going to have a cup of coffee and double chocolate chip cookies til you had the nerve to mention haggis AND bloodied brie in the same sentence. Yikes! The coffee and cookies do sound good tho…hhhmm…brb…🤗

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    1. There you go. No rest for the wicked! Super Cassandra won’t give up. You’re totally allowed to have a rest, and even a mope. Scream at the universe if it makes you feel better. All part of what we superwomen do! Followed by coffee and cake and then some! The world better be ready…

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  2. Sending you strength and good vibes from across the pond. Don’t worry, I’ll keep the haggis and the brie with ketchup this side of the Atlantic! You will get through these tough times, Cassandra. Unfortunately, there is never a fast track or even a short cut for grief. If only… You are a strong woman. This hurts so much because your love was, is and will always remain strong and you miss your friend so much. You are capable of great love. That’s a blessing. The best.

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