Category: Writing

Real talk: God and Life WILL fight for you and with you as YOU do.

So, that just happened!

Wow.

Awesome!!!!!!!

*Cassandra does some serious chair dancing*

Am going to ‘tell the truth and shame the devil’ like mom liked to say….hey mom…*Cassandra waves to mom in heaven*

I had been wrestling, ALL last night, ALL this morning, ALL early afternoon. Wrestling with how to discreetly back my way out of a meeting needing to be had. Had armed myself with this excuse, with that fantastic reason and had let my boss know I didn’t want to meet, after all. My bad. Keep the trains moving and took off, myself.

Thankfully, my boss was/is much smarter than me. Told me ‘let’s talk, anyway’ and said ‘I’d like to know how you really feel’.

Long story short, I was completely honest and said I didn’t know if I could be completely honest, to be completely honest. After being given permission, I WAS honest: completely, totally, transparently. I didn’t look to save their feelings or my own. Just spoke, plainly. Said I didn’t think a thing would be done, that I didn’t think I would be heard, didn’t think what I thought mattered, didn’t think anything would change so why keep beating my head against the wall, that I used to never feel that way and felt bad that I did about this situation.

Longer story shorter, I was heard. So much so that wheels have been set in motion. What’s more, I earned respect, strengthened the relationship and received commitment to things I had not thought of as a possibility.

What if I had given in to fear, discouragement, frustration etc and not met with the boss? Am glad I fought for me, stood up for my decisions and be met, halfway. The outcome now no longer matters. Yes, it will be nice to have things adjusted. If they are not, if things turn out differently then the differently I foresaw, now being promised, I will continue to keep on doing and being me and keeping it moving.

The win was in not giving in to fear, in doing what was right no matter how I felt or how I felt it might be perceived, in ACTING and not letting things slide whilst continuing to be upset and mutter to myself.

I did the thing.

I tried.

I spoke up.

I spoke out.

God and Life stood up for me, with me and I can rest, now. No matter what happens now.

Am trying to turn this current glass of bitter/hard happenings to something enjoyable to drink. Or, at least drink it knowing all things work for my good.

Keep fighting for you.

Your needs are important.

Your thoughts are important.

YOU are important.

fighting for and with you,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

The hard isn’t so hard if you keep trying hard.

Keep, going.

Keep, going.

Keep, going.

It gets easier, I promise it does. Okay, it may not get easier but YOU get:

Stronger.

Better.

Faster.

More, resilient.

More, patient.

More, stable.

More, ready.

More, steady.

The longer you stay in the fight, in the try, in the hard…the harder it gets for you to give up, to give in.

Push.

Push.

Push.

You got this.

You CAN.

You SHALL.

Keep going.

I go with you.

We got this.

We ain’t no chumps!

Yes, we hurt.

Yes, we cry.

Yet, we keep it moving.

No matter what.

No matter what.

We keep going.

We good people.

We tough people.

We weak people who knows where our strength lies.

Ha!

Tell defeat to go on head and kick some rocks! Not welcome ’round here.

Ha!

laughing at defeat with you,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Real talk: Saying the truth out loud.

Sometimes, you just have to tell yourself the truth, out loud, so you can keep it moving.

Just HAD to say, out loud, I want to quit my job, pack a bag and drive until I run out of gas.

Can’t do that.

Won’t do that.

Just had to be honest, say how I feel, get out of my feelings, and keep it moving.

Am so over this day I can’t even find a suitable positive saying that will say positively what I would like to say for real. For some reason, there are no kick rocks but life still wonderful ones…hhm…*shrug*…

On the one hand, my mini cinnamon rolls and plain Ruffles were delivered this morning. 🙂

Also, the new season of Billions is absolutely delightful and new series The Endgame has been semi interesting. The fact that the main character appears to be Russian is unfortunate given recent real-life events.

Hang in there, all.

We got this. And, even when we don’t got this we know who does!

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Purpose.

You have one.

You ARE one.

Nuff said.

Keep it moving and tell discouragement to go on head and kicks some rocks.

kicking rocks of discouragement with you,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Late payment.

Yea, so I think I may be late on today’s payment yall.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

I needed a good laugh and another cup.

Keep going.

This post made me laugh out loud.

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Light IS coming.

I love this particular quote. It’s a reminder that we were never promised easy yet we have been promised comfort and a way through the dark hours and times.

Last night seemed an eternity long. Just did not want to end. I woke, exhausted from trying to snatch a few hours of sleep in a sleepless night. It has been nice, though, being good to myself and allowing myself this time of growing in the midst of dark hours and times.

Plants grow, beneath the soil, in the dark, where no one can see. Amazing. A, miracle. Growing, amidst root, dirt and all manner of creepy and crawly things. Until, one day….

LIFE!

New, life.

Grown, from a seed. Such a tiny thing. How can something so big, so vital, so necessary, so tasty, grow from such a teensy weensy thing called a seed?

The bible says if we but have just a touch of faith, as a mustard seed, well, we can move mountains. We can do many things. Just by having a teensy weensy bit of faith. Just a seed. Just something that can be planted so God and Life can nourish it, flourish it, grow it until it sprouts, loudly, proudly, awesomely.

For, us to partake of.

Until then, it remains, hidden, in the dark, growing, silently, awaiting the day of it’s unearthing.

The light IS coming.

Til then, God and Life resides in the dark and is not afraid of it. Neither, need you be. Life goes on in light AND darkness. The only thing darkness contains is the unknown we can’t see. The unknown can seem, can be, scary. Yet, the unknown can also be exciting, exhilarating, and so very many positive things if we but embrace what comes our way.

The light IS coming.

Til then, keep going.

I go with you.

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Make today amazing.

Yea, I know, life has been kicking thee about thine ass. And, doing a fantastic job.

Yea, I know, you bout tired of being bout that life and being bout it.

Yea, I know, the weather has been bad, ALL current news has been sad.

Yet, we still here, beloveds. Kicking it. Kicking tail and taking names.

Yet, we got our fight on, our mind strong, our back up and cutting up whilst we are telling ALL fear/discouragement to go on head and kick some rocks.

Yet, we covered, we loved, we cherished, we fought for, we cared for, we seen, we heard.

Yes.

Yes!

YES!!

Make today amazing.

YOU are amaizing.

You are.

As am I.

All the struggles, all the fighting, can make us forget who, whose we are and what we about.

ALL we have to do is keep on keeping on.

Have another cup.

Take out the trash.

Make the tasteless chili.

Say.

Live.

Love.

YYYASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

Am chair dancing, still, for those who can’t yet sing, can’t yet dance, can’t yet see their way out of the darkness. I have the flashlight, I am here, best as I can be, pointing the way, keeping folks company as we make our way, successfully, through this thing called life.

We got this!

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Time to lean in.

I don’t know about you but it seems like EVERY day of this year has been one fight or other to stay positive, to keep trying, to keep even having the modicum of want to. Want to took off and left before they year got started.

Sure is tougher doing the day when want to has opted out and all that is left is the choice to try or not. Geez Louise it has been hard not to tell want to to go on ahead and kick some rocks.

This is the time, however, to lean in. To lean in, hard, to the promises, to the joy, to the hope, to the loving, to the living, to the giving, to the saying, to the receiving.

So many folks are on the verge. On the verge, of miracles they are fixing to give up on. On the verge, of dreams that are fixing to come true. On the verge, of love like they have never known. On the verge, of living those life-long fantasies. On the verge, of so very many things yet they are also on the precipice of who gives two damns.

Lean in, beloveds. Lean in. Take hold. Stand firm. Stand fast. Yes, it’s tough. It’s a must, though.

Lean in.

You got this.

I got this.

We got this.

God and Life has got us all.

It just doesn’t feel that way.

It just doesn’t feel.

Or, it feels too much.

Yikes!

Egads!

Yep, grab hold of Yikes! and Egads! and press through.

pressing through with and for you,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Nuff said.

One of those days where hard was hard wouldn’t stop being hard, laughed when I said good yikes this is really hard, and just got harder.

Unfair happenings kept happening and kept being unfair, shrugged when I said good yikes this sho nuff not fair.

What did I do? Told my boss I was taking off the rest of the afternoon, made a cup of coffee, grabbed some double chocolate chip cookies and headed to go tell Picard all about my morning/afternoon……hahahahahahahahhahhahha.

Just some days that just can’t be understood.

I trust that God and Life will handle my bidnezz sooner or later. In the meantime, since I have the rest of the afternoon off I am fixin to ‘make it so’

Engage!

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Don’t be afraid to reach out and let someone know when you are tired. I reached out to a friend and asked for some support. IMMEDIATELY, not when it was convenient. I am important enough to cause some supposed ‘inconvenience’. Am so thankful I did. I was able to lean on a friend, for just a few moments, take a breath, and get permission to just take a few hours and breathe.

Hang in there, folks. It’s almost spring time. Don’t be afraid or ashamed if you need to take some time to get your heart back to wanting to do what it just does not feeling like doing right now.

Healing and things take time. Taking much longer than I thought it would or maybe should. Yet, the more space I have given myself, the better I feel, the more optimism I can see/feel. I am trying to get away from world foolishness that we are only allowed a few minutes before we are supposed to be healed, okay and on and on.

True and lasting healing and growth can take a looooooooooooooooooooooooooong minute. Much longer than we hoped it would. Don’t get on yourself for having taking longer than you imagined, for taking time off work, for turning off your phone and letting your family and friends know you just don’t have enough to give to them until you are able to fill up and give to yourself.

The strongest thing you can do, beloveds, during these times are to recognize and to say out loud that you just don’t have it. I got up today, tried today, and could see I just did not have it, today. I reached out and asked to speak with my manager and brought him up to speed. He was completely supportive and understanding when I advised I did not have enough to give where I could be effective today.

In times past, I would have forced myself, would have forced my way to doing the job, no matter what doing the job would do to me.

Your life is important, beloveds. Don’t run it into the ground thinking you have to be the one to do everything, to do all the caring, to do all the heavy lifting. Your job, your family, your relationships can allow you the space to breathe, to rest, to take stock, as needed.

Choose YOU, at times like these.

Life is good, still, even when it’s hard.

Keep believing.

You are NOT your results. Your results come from your efforts but not your responsibility to make this happen or that happen.

Be encouraged.

Keep dancing.

Nuff said.

Having giving a bit of me and fixing to do a bit more dancing in the rain. Picard is waiting!

Make it so, beloveds.

Get on out there and dance in the rain.

These tough days will have their end.

In the meantime, find some joy in your day(s).

We were given this day, these moments, to use as we please.

I choose to enjoy mine.

What about you?

What are you doing with these days?

With THIS day?

Say.

Live.

Love.

living and loving me some you,

Cassandra