*A fierce battle was raging. Chocolate donuts sang her alluring song. Swayed, wooed, thinking of the comfort they would bring, Cassandra fought valiantly to resist knowing the very vestige of the global economy rested on her standing fast.*
Okay, so the global economy would not have collapsed, had I given in and did some comfort eating.
That said, I’m thankful I CHOSE to not wallow, in grief. Doesn’t mean my heart did not grieve.
It did.
Doesn’t mean I pretended I didn’t miss mom.
I did.
Doesn’t mean I STILL fight, with everything in me, the urge to hide beneath a mountain of covers. Hidden, til mom’s birthday passes. Locked away, in the dark, pretending the worst day on earth never happened.
It did.
So, I find comfort, today, in TODAY. I find comfort, today, in sharing laughter with mom, still, over something dumb she or I had said, to one another.
I find comfort, beloveds, in my try. Knowing, mom is cheering me on. I find comfort, in working. I find comfort, in many things.
Notice I said, I FIND. We have to CHOOSE to keep living, after a loss. We have to CHOOSE to be good to us, though we may want to find comfort in all manner of unhealthy things, folks and situations.
We MUST choose.
EVERY day.
Yea, it’s hard. It is. Hard doesn’t give us the right to hurt ourselves because we are hurting.
Truly, I may yet find comfort in a mountain of covers, whilst comforting myself with some chocolate donuts. If so, I shall forgive me for leaning on chocolate donuts instead of the love and care of God and my family and few friends.
I am thinking of and praying for all who have experienced a loss of any kind. To them, their devastation has been devastating. My losses, have been devastating. Your losses, I’m sure, have been devastating.
Be encouraged.
I pray comfort, for all.
Remember:
You are loved.
You are NOT alone.
Keep on being…YOU.
#YourLifeMattersToMe
Note: Keep going. We got this, don’t we?
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Why Can't I Be Loud?! 