Month: October 2024

Uprooted: Family.

I love my family.

My family loves me.

I think.

The old me, anyway.

Sucks for me as I am no longer her. I’ve tried to br her. For them. Not me. I have moved on from her. From THAT me. THIS me is unsettled. This me is unsettling.

This me can no longer fake it til I make it. This me can no longer hide her fatigue. This me is feeling 55 years worth of tired/exhaustion I don’t know what to do with.

Hurry! That’s what I tell my exhausted heart. I need to find another job so I can pay the bills. The  worker bee in me has gone on strike. Crapola!

I no longer know HOW to do the pretend dance we have all been taught to dance. Everything is NOT alright. Mom is gone. My job is gone. Don’t even get me started on the weather event that tore up the yard.

I love my family.

I don’t know if my family will/can love THIS me. This me is terribly wounded right now. I’m trying to hurry and heal. I need to be able to do the dance we have all been taught to do.

Be encouraged. As you change, your family WILL love you. I think…lol. We shall be alright. It doesn’t have to be today…

hopeful sort of,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note:

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

If this piece encouraged you, share it with someone please/thanks.

Repeat after me: I’ll find a way.

Repeat after me:

I’ll find a way.

Nuff said. Now go find the damned way! Enough with dismissing you and your try. You ARE enough, beloveds.

Now, go be enough!

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: What are you still doing here? Get going. Go on ahead and dominate your day. We got thangs to do…

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

I’ll find a way.

Fear: You can’t make it there.

Me: I’ll find a way.

Doubt: You won’t be accepted there.

Me: I’ll make the way.

Rejection: You will never be received.

Me: I’ll show the way.

Satan: You shall NEVER get there.

Me: He IS The Way. I’m with Him. Move outta my way!!

Sure wish I knew which way to go. That being said, I’ll find a way.

Will you?

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Life is short, beloveds. Make a way, find a way, find The Way and go with Him. Asking for A Friend.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Here, I sit.

Here, I sit.

Alone.

Waiting.

For:

A friend?

An answer?

A reason?

I have not a clue. I just find myself here.

Here, I sit.

Waiting.

For what?

Does it matter?

We shall see.

waiting,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Something, deep inside, has been waiting. For something? For someone? I have no idea. Still, I wait. The day grows late. Is it my dreams, God? Is it You? What/who awaits me? Asking for a friend(me).

If it is on your heart to wait, then wait. Patiently. Imperfectly. Ah, beloveds, greatness is coming…wait…..wait….wait!

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

What if I can’t? What if I could?

What if I can’t? What if I could?

What if I couldn’t. What if I would have?

What if…

What if I stopped asking and just DID?

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Think I will find out what all this what if is all about…🤔

How about finding out with me? I dare you…

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Stupid idea(s): I know what to do.

I was 📝 writing.

I was writing content.

I was contentedly writing.

My heart sighed.

The Universe smiled.

Suddenly, the world opened up: In my hands. Through my words. I could see. Finally.

Ah, God, finally, I understand.😁🤗

For years, beloveds, God has been cajoling me to write. Just write. What was on my heart. What was on my mind.

Write, He said. Write and encourage others. And, I would always argue:

Who would ever listen to me?

What could I ever say that would be of any interest or import?

What do I have to give?

What do I have worthy enough for others to value what I had to say?

Write, He said to me.

I don’t know how, I always said.

Secretly, I thought this was a stupid idea. Of course, beloveds, I couldn’t very well tell God His Plan for my life was stupid.

Truth be told, beloveds, God has often told folk to do really dumb/stupid things. Like walk around Jericho for days without saying a word. Then, when it was time, folk had to bum rush Jericho to throw hands and seize everything. Dummies.

He also told Sarah she would have a baby when Sarah was like 150 years old. Sarah laughed. I would have done the same.

He also told a young man to slay a humongous giant Philistine with a sling and a rock.

He also told Moses to roll up to Pharaoh and tell old boy to let God’s People go. Pharoah laughed until all those plagues made him to cry uncle.

I guess then, beloveds, you could forgive a sista for thinking God had told her to do a terribly silly thing.

Still, sillily, God said write. Stupidly, I continued to argue. For years.

Finally, I wrote. Arguing all along the way. Over the course of years, God encouraged me to make a blog, to write full-time:

I don’t have the time.

I’m too busy.

I’m too tired after work.

I don’t have money.

I don’t have support.

I don’t have a network.

I…

I…

I…

The tornado 🌪, it seems, have wiped away all of my excuses. I no longer care why, beloveds. I no longer worry about how. I no longer concern myself with who will or will not listen.

My why has to now. Why? I could have died in that tornado. I’m amazed I am still here. I look at destruction not yet touched and realize my dreams could have been snatched from the 🌎 as easily as two tornadoes turned this town on its literal head.

Tonight, as I wrote, I gave nary a thought to bills. As I wrote, all I felt was peace, joy, gratitude, and thanksgiving. All I wanted to do, beloveds, was to love on you. That’s it. Whether you loved me back was of no concern.

I know what to do, beloveds: Be…ME. Stupidly. Clumsily. Loudly. Quietly. Unapologetically.

My why was born simply to love folk and encourage them to do, to be, to know they are loved and not alone.

Keep doing your why. Even if it seems stupid. Even if it IS stupid to the world. So what? You’ve got thangs to do.

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note:

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Quitting is NOT an option!

Repeat after me:

Quitting is NOT an option.

Nuff said.

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Anyone can quit. There is too much in you to quit, beloveds. I don’t give two hoots what is going on in your life. This period is just a period. Periodt! This is NOT the end. Your story is not finished.

Get up. Get going. Keep it moving. Drag discouragement with you. Tell disappointment so what and keep on keeping on. We got thangs to do. Asking for A Friend.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Are you willing?

Are you willing?

To remain in a hard place?

To keep doing the hard thing?

To maintain?

To continue?

To remain?

Anyone, beloveds, can continue when skies are clear. Anyone, beloveds, can maintain the easy path.

It takes courage to keep on keeping on when the way gets hard. It takes tremendous strength to remain when all have fled and left you alone.

Are you willing, The Universe queried me.

Yes, I replied.

Are you willing, beloveds?

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: This was a short piece, with a heavy question. Are you willing? Am I? I want to be a coward. I want to say ‘no’. I want to hide among the obscure. I want to tell my want to to go on ahead and kick some rocks.

Yet, my dreams won’t let me be. I don’t know why in the fresh hell these stupid dreams have stayed so consistently LOUD! Dammit, dreams, I am 55. Let me be an old, comfortable, fat lady. Why can’t you leave me be, you big, ridiculously impossible dreams?! Fresh egads!…*sigh*.

I was almost at give up’s end, beloveds. ALMOST. Yea, boy, I was fixin’ to quietly surrender my dreams to the lies which came to claim them.

Ha! That’s what my dreams said, beloveds. Ha! No way! Stubborn, silly dreams of mine. These stubborn dreams keep chasing me awake! Let me sleep, I say. I wish I could bury these terribly loud burdens, er, dreams and live this loudly desperate/boring life of mine. Ack.

Somebody’s why keeps tugging at my why. I don’t know which one or ones of you who is wooing my dreams so. Ah, beloveds, what the world are we going to DO with these dreams and whys of ours?

Help us, Universe. We are ready to soar. We are tired of roaming around with our whys pestering our every step. We have got so many thangs to do. Help us to do what we sooooooooooooooooo long to do.

We have much to give, Life. Help us to bloom. Help us to take off. Help us to get to the top. There is so much more to us. How do we know? Because our whys and our dreams tell us so.

Asking for many friends.

Be encouraged, all. Keep on doing your why. Keep on listening to your dreams. Even when they drive you up fifty walls. Even when you have no idea what to do. Even when folk look at you as though you have lost what is left of your faculties.

The Universe is not picking on you. Just pulling out the greatness within. Hang in there. You CAN. You will. You do NOT walk alone. Neither do I. We got this. Let’s get it…

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

With your entire being.

With your entire being.

Stand on business.

With your entire being.

Fight for your dreams.

With your entire being.

Love this life.

With your entire being.

Ask for what you need/want/must have.

Beloveds, I have been told to be quiet my whole life. As a black woman, I have been shamed into thinking to be passionate is to be, somehow, wrong.

I have been dismissed. I have been discouraged. I have been discounted. I have been abused. I have gone through hell and high water. All because I am loud. All because I am me.

I’m not ashamed to be me. Not anymore.

A black woman is running to be the next President of The United States. Because of this, she has been shamed. She has been blamed of using her race, of using her ethnicity, of using her sex to get ahead.

By men. By women. By folk who are afraid to try something different. By folk who are afraid to be different.

To Kamala Harris, I say this:

Keep being YOU.

Keep standing on business.

With your entire being, Kamala, please keep on being… YOU.

For everyone else, keep on keeping on. Believe in you.

With your ENTIRE being.

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: If someone knows how to get hold of Kamala Harris, tell her this 55 year old, loud, broke woman is praying for her. The voting booth shall have my seal of approval. 🥰❤

Life is short, beloveds. Do what sets your soul on fire. Every day. Who knows what your spark shall set on fire?! I hope.🧨🔥🌊

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

If this piece encouraged you, share it with someone please/thanks.

Fight: Can I talk to you?

I want you to fight, beloveds.

I want you to fight for you.

I want you to fight for your dreams.

Too many, beloveds, have given up.

I used to be one of them. One of the secret ones. One of the ones who had secretly ceded the ground of their dreams.

Why?

Why not?

I was nothing.

I was no one.

I was no import. At least, that’s what the world told this black, female, loud and worthless hide.

For too many years, beloveds, I fought for everyone but me. Me, I hid. Me, I refused to champion.

Why?

Because I was a nobody, remember?

Yet, something inside me absolutely refused to believe this about me. THIS rose up, in me. THIS became my why: To let folk KNOW they were loved and NOT alone.

That folk are worthy. That folk are worthwhile. That folk are worth it. They are. We are. I am. You are.

Now, I fight. Every day. Every single damned day. I fight for you. I fight for me. I fight for us all.

Dammit, God, fight with me. Send some folk to help me. I can’t reach them all. Can/will you?

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Do THIS, beloveds. Whatever your THIS is. I would give my last dollar to be able to show a million folk how much they are loved and cared for. My dollars don’t stretch that far. All I can send are my love. Crap. Just doesn’t seemed to be a damned enough! Is it?…😥😡🎤

Be encouraged. I am foolish enough to believe these words will set someone free. I hope. Hope with me…

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

If this piece encouraged you, share it with someone please/thanks.