Month: October 2024

Real talk, God, I don’t think I will survive this.

Me: I don’t think I will survive this.

God: You will.

That’s what I said, beloveds, when mom died. I

survived.

Me: I don’t think I will survive this.

God: You will.

That’s what I said, beloveds, when hearing that awful tornado in my yard.

I survived.

Me: I don’t think I will survive this.

God: You will.

That’s what I told God, yesterday, looking at my almost empty bank account. The answer(s) have not come. Not yet. Soon, I hope, I shall say…

I survive.

Until then, I hope.

Until then, I stand.

Until then, I believe.

Until then, I try.

Until then,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Be encouraged, beloveds. You SHALL survive. You SHALL win. You SHALL prosper. You SHALL make it. You SHALL love. You SHALL live. You SHALL thrive. You SHALL laugh. You SHALL do all the things dummy fear/doubt has lied and told you can’t/shan’t. Tell fear/doubt to shut up and kick rocks. We got this. I think…lol.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Real talk: Can I be honest with you?

Can I be honest with you, beloveds?

I soooooooooooooooooooo almost gave up.

Not on God.

Not on you.

On ME.

I was sooooooooooooooooooooo angry.

With me.

Why?

Because, the tornado scared me so badly I couldn’t return to work. I STILL am not ready to pretend the world is right side up and do something mundane like take care of every day life things.

I hear the roaring of the tornado. Still. I hear the racing, of my heart. Still. I hear the silence of everything that was snatched up. Still.

I keep trying to make a deal with The Universe. Just leave this one, old lady alone and she will do the same. Just leave her to doing the same old same old. Take these stupid, loud dreams, of hers and leave her to the old, tired comfortableness of sameness.

Ha! That’s what The Universe said to me. It’s kind of hard, beloveds, to give up when The Universe screams Ha! all up in your face. Kind of makes one get some act right. Kind of makes one want to say Ha!

Ha! That’s what I told old.

Ha! That’s what I told unknown.

Ha! That’s what I told 55.

I think I will listen to The Universe. Comfortable has cost me too much. Comfortable has left me lonely. Comfortable has caused me too much heartache/grief from not pursuing my dreams with everything within me.

Now, I squeeze every once of me out of my days. I am looking for my dreams everywhere. Dammit, dreams, where in the holy heckamiah are you hiding?!!

Whew! I managed to snatch my dreams from the jowels of despair/defeat.

I find it maddening how easy it can be to scare the begeez out of our dreams. This is why we MUST continue to feed them. Why we MUST continually encourage them and ourselves. Whether we feel like it or not.

Real talk, beloveds, choosing to ALWAYS choose to stay positive is positively exhausting, at times. Keep at it, though. There is too much wonderful in you.

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Hang in there. There is so much hard going on, right now. This too SHALL pass. It will. In the meantime, be good to you. Be honest with you. Be prepared to put down your pride and reach out for support. Then, rest. You are doing all you know. Be okay with that, okay? In case no one has told you today: You are magnificent. Also, you are loved.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

It only takes a moment.

It only takes a moment.

For a moment to become a memory.

A memory…now a forever moment.

Ah, God. It feels as though I am running out of moments. I fight to squeeze every drop of moment from each minute.

I can’t stop them,  God! Oh, God, I am running out. Mom took all her moments with her. Dammit. All she left me with were memories of moments spent with her. They are not enough. Dammit.

My heart longs for more moments. With her. Trying to get close to You. You are with her, God. I am jealous. I want to be angry with you both…for taking away my moments. You can have these stupid memories, God!

Ah, Life. Help me to cherish the memories. They are all I have left. They are not enough. Fresh hell.

It only took one moment, mom. For you to go. I’m doing my best to enjoy these moments without you. The memories ARE sweet. Ah, mom. I think I shall make new moments. Look out for me as I steer clumsily through these moments.

At this moment, I find gratitude tucked within the walls of my broken heart. I am grateful for the memories we built together. I think I shall focus on the memories. I forgive the moments taken.

I have to go now, mom. I’ve got thangs to do. My dreams are hiding in these moments. Thanks for these moments.

grateful for the moments,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Praying for all who have lost and don’t know how to…be encouraged.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

With everything within me.

A war is waging.

Deep inside.

No idea who/what is winning.

I know I am tired of this internal battle. I would like to live a boring life where I cared not for a thing but paying bills, being comfortable, getting through. Yep, I sure wish my heart would allow me to live a boring damned life already!!!!

Dammit. I detest swearing. Shhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiit.

Ah, beloveds, I wish I wasn’t a writer. I wish words would have never nestled deep within. I wished those same words would stay buried, would stay silent, would leave me the hell alone.

Not knowing what to DO with these damned words is damnably hard. What if I don’t say them? What if I do? I am tired of the unknown.

GGEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEZ.

The Universe woke me. Said someone needed my words. Their why is mixed up with my words. And, my why is mixed up with their dreams. Ack and what in the fresh hell!!?

Anyway, beloveds, I am stopping by to encourage SOMEBODY to keep on keeping on. Don’t give up. Not just yet. Your dreams are yet to be fulfilled. So are mine. I wish they would hurry.

I think the tornado has sucked every rational thought from my brain. Now, all my brain can think of is waiting for SOMETHING/SOMEONE to….I don’t even know what I am waiting for. Yet, my heart knows. Ack.

If I am not making sense, don’t blame me. The Universe has come and turned my world upside down. My heart is seeking the unknown. I want to run back to what has always been comfortable.

I shall be 56 soon. What shall 56 bring? Who knows. God does and He ain’t telling. Fresh hell.

For some reason, someone, somewhere needed these particular words. Take them. In return, can you bring me my dreams?

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Be encouraged. If we weren’t close to our miracles hard wouldn’t be fighting us so hard. Keep going. In the meantime, keep on being good to you. Put on some uplifting music. Read a book. Watch a comedy. Crawl up on The Father’s Lap and bore Him with ALL your cares as I plan on doing. Who is with me?

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Get up and fight(write).

Fear rolled up on me with quite the roar.

Like a moron, I listened.

I feared.

I turned out the lights.

I hid.

I wondered where God was.

I yelled at an unlistening Universe.

Then, good habits told me to shut up, get up, and write.

I shut up.

I got up.

I am writing.

Life can be tough, beloveds. When it gets hard, try harder. When it gets discouraging, try harder. When you are ready to run away and hide, try harder. Rinse. Repeat.

I refuse to give up. Crap. Life sure would be easier if I did…

fighting still,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: I admit it. I was all ready to feel sorry for myself and tell dreams to kick rocks. I can’t. These damned things are just too damned loud! Crap.

Instead, I made some soup and figured I would pass on a bit of encouragement to someone who is also secretly considering giving up on their dreams. Not quite yet, beloveds. We got thangs to do.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Hey world, I need to give you…

Hey world, I need to give you…

World I’m 📢 :

Annoyed with you. You have been telling us lies, for the entirety of our lives.

You have called black, white.

You have said up, was down.

You have called this, that.

You have called write, wrong.

You have convinced folk to:

👉 Point the finger, instead of extend the 🤝 hand.

Choose hate, over love.

Bearing arms, instead of bearing arm’s❤️‍🩹.

Broken barriers, instead of building/mending fences.

Fear diversity, instead of embracing differences.

I’m keeping it 💯, world.

I am so damned loud, in part, because of you. I am doing my best to let the whole of the world know each are:

Seen.

Heard.

Loved.

Valued.

Not alone.

You shall NOT overcome us, world. You, in fact, have been overcome.

Keep folks names out of your mouth!

Leave folks be so they can just be!

Take your expectations, world, and:

Kick rocks!

Take TWO seats!

Be afraid. Be very afraid!

We are coming for you, world.

I’m keeping it a buck with you!

Enough!

keeping it a buck,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Sometimes, beloveds, one needs to take a stand. Ha! Keeping it 100…

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Repeat after me: I’m going anyway.

Repeat after me:

I may fail.

I’m going anyway.

They may say no.

I’m saying anyway.

It may not work out.

I’m trying anyway.

He/she/they may not love me back.

I’m loving them anyway.

I may finish last.

I’m entering the race anyway.

I may burn everything.

I’m cooking anyway.

I might sound like an idiot.

I’m speaking anyway.

Everyone may leave if I stay.

I’m staying anyway.

No one may follow me if I go.

I’m going anyway.

Whatever the outcome, I’m being me…

Anyway.

Keep being you.

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Do your thangs anyway…

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

On the other side of the door.

Me: I’m afraid to open you. 🚪

🚪 Door: Why?

Me: I don’t know what I shall find on the other side.

🚪 Door: Open me and see.

Me: K.

I am ready to see what’s on the other side of the door. How about you?

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: There is sooooooooooooooooooo much joy, beloveds, waiting on the other side of fear. How do I know? I had to go through a ton of fear, open the door, and experience awesome joy, on the other side…..yyyyyaaaaasssssssssssssss!!

Time to tackle your what have you on the other side of the door….

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Heart check Friday on a Thursday.

How is your heart, beloveds?

Just checking on YOU. I hate that you don’t take enough time to be about being about it for YOU. So, God has sent me along to bug you, er, send some love and care your way.

How is YOUR heart? Tell the truth. If you are tired, say so. Then, give yourself permission to REST. I promise the world will be there when you get back. I think…lol!

I am bellowing ‘We Are The World’ at the top of my lungs. Okay, in my head but still….((((hugs everyone))))))))))))).

Ah, beloveds, you are loved. You are. For God so loved the world….((((((((((((hugs everyone))))))).

I grieve and pray for a world that is sooooooooo hurting it is forever hurting everything and everyone in it’s path.

I weary of the election season. Every four years, division/hate and awful rhethoric are tossed around in every corner of America and the world.

Ah, beloveds, that we all rose, in unison, to declare ENOUGH!

Let it begin with me:

I love you.

I care deeply for you life.

I pray for you.

I hope for the best for you and yours.

I root for you.

I cheer for you.

Who is with me?

How is your heart?

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Life is short. Let’s love one another, eh?

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Persevere.

Persevere.

Quitting is NEVER an option, beloveds. Rest as needed. Then, get on back up and keep moving. FORWARD. Ever forward.

Persevere.

Fight through your fear of the unknown. Press through unbelief. Keep throwing haymakers at all that is troubling you.

Persevere.

We shall NEVER relent, beloveds. Life is much too short to be giving up on ourselves, eh? We got thangs to do.

Let’s keep on being about being about it.

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Fight on. No matter what you are going through. Fight on. The rewards shall be worth it…

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!