What do you do?

faith, God, Hobbies, Music, Poetry, Running, Song, walking, Writing 2 Minutes

What do you do when everything inside you wants to give up? What do you do? When the last step you take in seems like is the only other step you can take?

Every step has been hard since my twin sister died. Every one. There has not been any easy moments. There has not been too many carefree moments.

This morning. I texted my big brother and admitted to him I was struggling so hard. I had to be honest with him. I had to be honest with myself.

I just stopped to encourage somebody. Starting with me. If you are currently going through a hard time because a year has been so terribly hard… I got you. I understand. I’m right there with you.

I make myself get up every day. I make myself make breakfast. I make myself make my coffee.

I was so tired today. I was so sad today. There were so many things today I didn’t. Have the wherewithal to peel the egg, let alone eat them. They will be my supper.

The work day was especially hard. I was grateful for the work day. I told myself tomorrow would be easier. I’m going to do the best I can to make it so.

I wanted to be with God today. I wanted to be angry with Life today. I wanted to be angry with The Universe today.

I’m too tired to be angry. Life has happened. Terribly sad things have happened. I remind myself I am here for a reason. Today my reasons didn’t seem so important. I didn’t feel important today.

I just want to encourage someone to let you know you don’t have to be Superman or Superwoman all the time. You don’t have to slay the dragon all the time. You don’t have to win the game all the time. You don’t have to be the one who hits the home run. You don’t have to be the one who hits the winning shot.

There are days when just getting out of bed are a victory. I feel so I lost more than I won today. Still I tried. I tried to make people laugh. Not many laughed at my jokes today. I don’t blame. Maybe they hear me crying on the inside.

This meant to be a sad piece. It’s just a piece to let you know that we are human. It’s oikay to be human. I have not allowed myself to be human since my twin died. I truly don’t know how to move forward without her. Such a cruel ask, God. What do I DO with me now?

I’m listening to a motivational video. I’m trying to refill myself. I need to eat so I can go to bed. I hesitate. I don’t want to start the cycle all over. Sleep has been hard to find.

Be encouraged. I keep telling people not to take 2025 trouble into 2026. I’m going to try to take that same advice.

I hope these words have encouraged someone. Take care of your precious heart. There’s none like you.

asking for A Friend,
Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Ah, God. What the what are we supposed to DO with all this hard? Even the lemons are feeling a might bad for showing up so consistently on our doorsteps….

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Unknown's avatar

Published by Cassandra S.

Published

Your thoughts matter! Let us know how you feel.