BELOVEDS, IT IS OKAY NOT TO BE OKAY.
Beloveds.
Today was hard.
Not the kind of hard I need to hurry up and turn into an inspirational lesson.
Not the kind of hard I need to put a pretty bow around.
Just hard.
I am in an especially difficult health moment right now. The pain has been a lot, and today the brain fog came with it.
When that fog gets heavy, processing thoughts can become nearly impossible for me.
Things that ordinarily make sense don’t line up correctly.
Too much information becomes too much information.
I can know what I am trying to do and still struggle to get my brain to organize the pieces.
And when you’re already hurting physically, that can be incredibly frustrating.
So today?
I cried.
I had a good cry with my sis.
AND I had a good cry with my big brother.
And Beloveds, hear me:
IT IS OKAY TO CRY.
Crying doesn’t cancel strength.
Crying doesn’t mean you’ve given up.
Crying doesn’t erase your faith.
Crying doesn’t mean tomorrow won’t be different.
Sometimes you hurt.
Sometimes you are tired.
Sometimes you have carried all you can carry for that particular moment, and the tears come.
Let them.
I believe God.
I love God.
I trust God.
And today was still hard.
Those things can exist in the same sentence.
Faith doesn’t require me to lie about pain.
Hope doesn’t require me to pretend.
And strength certainly doesn’t require me to perform strength every waking minute.
Maybe you’re not okay today either.
Maybe your body hurts.
Maybe your heart hurts.
Maybe you’re grieving.
Maybe you’re overwhelmed.
Maybe something happened that you haven’t even figured out how to name yet.
Maybe you’re crying and don’t quite know why.
Or maybe you’ve been holding those tears back because somebody taught you that crying means you’re weak.
Beloved?
You don’t have to audition for comfort here.
Pull up a chair.
And I want to say something especially to those of you who don’t believe what I believe.
This is your home too.
You don’t have to believe in God to sit beside me.
You don’t have to borrow my faith language.
You don’t have to pretend to believe something you don’t believe just to be welcomed here.
I will tell you about the God I love because He is part of my story.
But I will never make believing exactly as I do the price of receiving my love.
Whosoeverwill.
That’s the invitation.
The chair stays.
🔒🔑
And if today has been one of those days for you too, I want you to hear me:
For all who are going through it, I gotcha and gotchu and God has us all.
If the last part isn’t your belief, the first part still stands.
I gotcha and gotchu.
You are not alone here.
Your pain doesn’t make you inconvenient.
Your tears don’t make you too much.
Your difficult day doesn’t disqualify you from tomorrow.
And you don’t have to stop crying before you pull up a chair.
There are more conversations coming, Beloveds.
We’re going to talk about voices.
We’re going to talk about being helped without being disappeared.
We’re going to talk about joy.
And tomorrow?
JOY DOES NOT HAVE TO EXPLAIN ITSELF.
Here’s a little piece I’ll leave with you until then:
NO DEEPER MEANING REQUIRED.
Because maybe this is part of what we’re learning together.
Sorrow doesn’t always need an explanation.
Neither does joy.
Sometimes we cry because it hurts.
Sometimes we laugh because something feels good.
Sometimes we’re okay.
Sometimes we’re absolutely not.
All of us are still keepers.
So if today wasn’t your day, come sit down.
No performance.
No explanation.
No pretending.
See my difference. Don’t make my difference all you see.
Help me without disappearing me.
And when life gets heavy?
Remember:
I gotcha and gotchu and God has us all.
The chair stays.
🔒🔑
Your life matters to me.
still here,
Cassandra
#YourLifeMattersToMe
Note: Today kicked my arse. How’s your heart doing. Be encouraged. We got this. I think!🥰👀🪞
