Category: faith

In the meantime has been awfully hard to live with in the meantime.

In the meantime has been awfully hard to live with in the meantime.

Someone forgot to provide me with a HOW TO manual on living in the meantime, in the meantime.

You know, in the meantime while we:

Wait.

Wait.

Wait.

And then wait some more.

Ack!!

Whew!!!

Ah, God, what in the fresh hell are we supposed to DO whilst waiting, in the meantime?

The meantime hurts.

The meantime is maddening.

The meantime is, well, mean.

There is no one feeding me grapes and fanning me as I wait out my dreams, in the meantime.

In the meantime, the meantime is getting harder and harder and harder to DO.

I want to kick and scream.

I want to cut up and act ten kinds of fool.

I want to run away and hide.

I want.

I want…*sigh*.

Ow, beloved, in the meantime sure has been tough to live with in the meantime.

How about you?


Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Be encouraged. We shall get there. Or not. In the meantime, enjoy your day. Life is short. I think I shall go ferret out whatever snacks Maggie/Craig/Chuckster have left. Not sure they left us much peeps. How dare they, eh?

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Practically impossible.

*sigh*

*pout*

*stamps foot*

I have been engaged in a raging argument with The Universe. And I mean rrrraaagggggginnnnnnng!

The truth has reared it’s ugly head and keeps reminding me I can NOT afford my dreams. I can NOT afford to quit my job and write. I can NOT quit my job and learn how to build a website etc.

I CAN learn to build one. Only work is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much work I am too exhausted to do anything but tumble into bed. Exhausted. Annoyed. Irritated I am much too tired to pursue my dreams.

I have been yelling at The Universe ALL day. In between work, that is. I am just simply tired of fighting with the damned Universe to help a sista out already!

I know. I know. Millions of folk have the same dilemma. Yet, there are the chosen wonderfuls who get the amazing opportunity to have plenty of time, money and opportunity to pursue their passions all day.

I am trying my best not to get on my case for having chosen occupations which don’t pay a whole lot. Rather, God chose ME for these occupations of serving folks. Don’t get me wrong. I love serving folk. It’s my passion. I just wish my passion PAID THE BILLS ALREADY GOD!!!!!!!

Ack!

*stamps foot*

Life is short. There are things I want to do. There are places I want to go. I have spent the better part of 3 decades serving folk and giving what I had. I wish I had more to give.

*sigh*. I don’t even know what I am trying to say, beloveds. I just know that I have outgrown this pot I am currently living in. My tent needs to be enlarged and I can’t enlarge it on my own UNNNNNNNNNNIIIVVVVVVVEEEEERRRRRSSSEEE!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, pout and rant over. I think.

God: Cmere.

Me: K

God: *whispers words only C’s heart can hear*

Me: Ah, God. I love me some You!

*Cassandras clambors off The Father’s Lap and gets about her day/life*

Life is amazing. Here I was, all downcast and sad. I had put on one of my youtube channels that plays beautiful music along with scriptures and the first one that popped up was Psalm 43:5 – Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me? Hope in God…

Hold on, beloveds. The way shall be made. He shall make the practically impossible POSSIBLE.

In the meantime. Three words that make me want to pop something or someone upside the head already!

My dreams are impossibly big. Are they impossible? I have no idea. God knows but He’s not telling.

waiting on a practically impossibly improbable dream,
Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: This is about as bad as fighting with the hot/cold water in the shower! Remind me to tell you about this morning’s adventure, er, shower…

In case no one has told you yet today: I love you.

P.S. Love someone. Starting with you. Keep shining your light into the darkness. Keep being a light. This world needs all the love it can get. Even the folks who are acting the biggest fools. Those need love the most. Let’s love these blockheads, er, hard headed folk, er,….lol.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Look at the good in the bad.

I have been working my way through a weekend of:

Sad.

Mad.

Wondering.

Wondering why Life is being such a damned pain!

I told The Universe I am simply TIRED of trying dammit!

The Universe told me to look for the good in the bad.

What the what?!!

I stormed around and ALL I could see, beloveds, was nothing but bad.

Tired, I began to look CLOSELY at the bad and began to see so much goodness there.

Ah.

Aha!

Within the bad, I found:

Tenacity.

Compassion.

Care.

For me.

FROM me.

Before, I would have forever beaten myself up for all I had not done. Now, I cut myself some slack.

Now, I take extra care. Now, I take extra care of ME.

I no longer view myself as unacceptable because things are tough.

I love me, now. If that’s what The Universe has needed to get me to loving me…

Bring on the bad. ALL things work together…

working for my good,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Be encouraged. You got this. As do I.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Divided we fall.

The is a war going on.

A war of words.

Words meant to divide.

Words meant to incite.

Words meant to instill:

Fear.

Anger.

Apathy.

I choose not to fight in this war.

I choose not to fight at all.

I choose to love.

Period.

And for the rest of my life.

Divided we fall.

Choose to love.

Tell the divide that the ONLY thing being divided is fear.

Life is short, beloveds.

Don’t give in to the daily click bait. The non stop race baiting. The constant rage baiting.

Love WILL win the day.

Love someone. Starting with you.

being a light,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: ❤️‍🩹♥️🔥

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Well, now…

Hhmm.

Well, now….

*scratches head*

*Cassandra peers at hard wondering what to DO with it*

I have been thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking about how the world to get my dreams to go on ahead and lift off already!

I keep deciding to decide. I just need to start the next phase. Except. I’m afraid. I think. Okay, not so much afraid but wondering. What if I fail spectacularly?

I think I am ready to find out. I think…

*Cassandra peers over the precipice of try wondering if she should just go on ahead and…*

Hey!

No fair!!

*Cassandra peers up at God and pouts dramatically*

Me: Why didja push me off the try cliff?

God: My bad. You appeared to need a bit of a push, er, help.

Me: lol

I have been enjoying trying. I have been enjoying getting up super early to daydream and write. I have been enjoying extra coffee. I have been enjoying yakking to The Universe about what may perchance be possible. I have been enjoying…

Ah.

Aha!

Life is short.

Enjoy it.

Be encouraged.

You got this.

God has got us all.

I love you.

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Life is not promised to us. We have no idea when and what and where. All we can do is the best we can. Embrace your life. Keep chasing down your dreams and enjoy the journey.

In case no one has told you today: I love you.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Tripping over sad.

I’m glad I took today off.

I keep tripping over sad. Normally, I would be here encouraging folk.

Hhm, I appear to be in here encouraging folk!

Ah.

Aha!

Be encouraged, beloveds. There is nothing wrong with tripping over sad when receiving tough news.

I shall sit with sad and shall see what she shall reveal to me.

Have a wonderful weekend. Life is good. Even when sad comes around.

wondering when this storm shall pass,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: I love you.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

We are all draft 📂 folders.🥰

🥰😂🤗

God told me, last night, I was like a draft folder!😂🥰

I have hundreds of pieces, all in various forms of undress, filling up my draft folder.

Some pieces have been marinating, for months. Other pieces, just a few days. Still others only wind up there momentarily.

Why? Beats me. Somethings just seem to want to root around and marinate in my life and heart.

Other stuff wants to regurgitate and be spewed out immediately. Okay, that was a bit of gross imagery.😳🤣. Geeez!

Anywho, our lives are like a draft 📂 folder because there are things we learn immediately. Other things take aeons to learn.  Still other things may take a life time to learn.

In the meantime, beloveds, we keep those things, in our hearts. Ruminating. Growing. Resolving. Learning.

The trick is understanding it’s okay to have various parts of us in various parts of undress!🤣🥰

Take heart, beloveds. Now, you can relax! You don’t have to be a finished product! Yaya! How great to know is that?!

The book of your life is ever being written. By you. By, God. By, Life. By, The Universe. By, so many things.

The awesome thing is you have an eraser on your pencil! You don’t HAVE TO use a pen.

Draw! Scribble! 📝 Write within the lines. Shade outside them. This is YOUR life, beloveds. This is YOUR draft 📂 folder.

Your draft was not meant to be mine!

Ah.

Aha!

I feel a piece calling me. How about you?

asking for a friend,


Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Enjoy your life. ALL of it. The boring parts. The frustrating parts. The annoying parts.

In case no one has told you yet: I love you.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Loving in the darkness.

Ah!

*hugs self*

Huh?

Get your mind out of the gutter, beloveds…Smh.

I was simply mooning, quietly, to some rollicking praise music, in the darkness.

Yall have NO idea how much it means, to be able to swoon and sway, in the darkness, WITHOUT fear.

Ah!

You have no idea, what it feels like, to be able to rest, in PEACE, in the darkness, if your life had been turned, upside down, in the darkness.

For some, trauma happened in the darkness. The darkness contained many monsters.

For me, the darkness contained foes a child not ought to have had to fight. Said child turned into a women deathly afraid of the dark.

Time heals. IF we allow it. I did. I healed. I grew.

Now, I enjoy the darkness. I yak, endlessly, to and with God. In the darkness. I know I am not alone.

Now, I am as comfortable, in the darkness as I am in the daytime.

I say this for those who believe they will never see the sun. You will.

I say this for those who think they will never heal.  You will.

I say this for those who wonder if their sleep will ever be sweet. It shall be!

Ah, beloveds. It feels sooooooooooooo darned good to be able to love in the darkness. Again.

I don’t know who these words are for. I know they are meant for somebody.

Be encouraged. I started this piece aeons ago. Life, however, got in the way and I had to leave it. Until today. For someone.

I pray God comfort every heart in need of mending.❤️‍🩹

Take care of yourselves, beloveds.

asking for A Friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note:

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Note to That Girl

Dear Younger Me Baby girlDon’t pray away the processingEmbrace the refiner’s fireStay on the Potter’s wheelIt is a temporary painDance in the rainLet the drops bathe over your soulLight a candlerather than curse the darkDevelop a taste for both bitter and sweetAppreciate the prickly thingsThey too have streaks of beautyRise to the occasionChallenge your fearsJump […]

Note to That Girl

Came across this just now. Much needed. Beautiful!

Isn’t it wonderful, beloveds, how a word, given at just the right moment, can heal the soul?

Retraining has been tough. I have spent the ENTIRE week feeling like a non essential idiot. In fact, I have never felt soooooooo inconsequential lately.

Then, a few folk began to poke their way into my comments and ♥ heart. 🥰. I am moved.

moved,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note:

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

Be kind: Raised voices.

I found myself raising my voice with four different siblings. For, four different reason. For, four unacceptable reasons.

I issued four different apologies.

I come from a large family. 13 brothers and sisters. Wow, mom and dad you all had a whole lot of kids! When I asked dad why the world he had sooooooooo many chillun, he said:

The radio did not work and the television was broken.

😳

🤣😂😉🤦‍♀️🤷‍♀️🥰❤

Being in such a large family, in order to be heard, we found ourselves shouting over one another. At time, we talk over one another, still.

I have been working to correct this, in me. I am doing MY work. I no longer use the excuse of this is how we were raised.

We all grow. Leastwise, I am doing my best to grow and love the best way I know how.

I no longer choose to participate in a dialogue where I have to raise my voice, to be heard.

The second, the very instant, you raise your voice, the temperature gets raised. I don’t want to speak to a tender heart, in the heat of anger. I want to calm down, THEN calmly have my say. Yes, I can still speak passionately. Yet, with no malice, intended, or otherwise.

I am about to step on a few toes. I apologize, in advance. Bandaid for boo boos, will follow:

Men use their voices, to intimidate. Yall do men. Because yall have been taught you can have your way over women and children, by raising your voice.

Women, in times past, when they hear a man, raise his voice, often back off and out of the conversation or situations.

Why?

Because, sadly, physical/emotional/sexual abuse often followed. And, even if it didn’t, just the hint is/was enough to silence a woman, a child.

Yet, those silent women and children, were/are simmering, with silent anger of their own.

When women try to point this out, to a man, he immediately becomes defensive and either hollers louder or mansplains himself. Either way, both sides lose out.

That said, women have been dismissed and dismissing their own needs, in need to protect men, they are seething with hidden anger and are taking hidden anger out on their bodies through food, sex with married men, sex with no men, sex as distraction, sex as a weapon, dropping the ball of motherhood to party cuz they have raised them kids alone and all manner of things.

As a society, men and women are each raising his/her voice to the other side with no side hearing the side speaking.

I say all that to say this: Hurt people, hurt people. I no longer choose to inadvertently or purposely hurt another soul because of how I was raised or how I was treated or how this or how that.

How about we, each of us, choose to raise our voices, in unity, in love, in solidarity, in integrity, in truth, in joy, in laughter, in as many ways as we possibly can to defuse anger and deal with the deep hurt, pain and wounds we have and hold inside our hearts?

As for me and mine:

I love you.

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

ttnette37@yahoo.com

Note: I find, as I write these words, tears are streaming down my face. Ah. Aha!

https://gofund.me/efbe8c13