WHAT DO I DO WITH ME NOW? 💔😭✍️

Beloveds,

I am writing through tears tonight.

Ah, God…

What do I DO with ME now?

Someone I love is not in love with me very much right now.

And there is no judgment here.

None.

Because I understand.

After my stroke, I was sooooo very…

I don’t even know what word belongs there.

Angry?

Terrified?

Confused?

Exhausted?

Grieving?

Probably all of it. 🧠💔

During those first days, I was angry. I slapped stuff around. I brought confusion and hurt into a house filled with people who loved me.

People who were trying to help me.

People who didn’t understand what was happening to me any more than I did.

And eventually, I got some act right. 😩😆

But getting some act right doesn’t erase what happened before I got it.

And now some of the blowback has arrived.

Ouch.

💔

I understand it.

I’d probably be angry too.

And understanding somebody else’s pain does NOT mean mine doesn’t hurt.

It hurts.

Fam, I’m sorry.

Jesus, I’m sorry.

God, I am so sorry.

I was so tired.

So terrible sometimes.

And underneath so much of it…

I was terrified.

😭

I was terrified because my life had changed.

My body had changed.

My brain had changed.

Things that used to belong to me without thought suddenly required effort.

And people were trying to love me while I was trying to understand who the heck ME even was anymore.

And here is one of the hardest things I have had to admit:

I did not allow love to love me.

💔❤️

Love came toward me, and sometimes fear answered the door.

Love tried to help me, and sometimes anger answered.

Love reached for me, and sometimes grief slapped its hand away.

That doesn’t make what I did okay.

But if I’m going to tell the truth about my behavior, I am going to tell the truth about my broken heart too.

Accountability does not require self-hatred.

I can say:

I hurt you.

I was wrong.

I understand why you’re angry.

I am sorry.

I wish I had handled things differently.

I am working on me.

And then I can resist adding:

Therefore, I am horrible and unworthy of love.

Nah, fam.

That’s not accountability.

That’s punishment.

And punishment cannot change yesterday anyway.

So what do I do with me now?

😭✍️🙏

I love her.

I teach her.

I correct her.

I forgive her.

I let her cry.

I make her apologize when she needs to apologize.

I make her listen when somebody else needs to tell their truth.

I remind her that being wounded does not give her permission to wound people.

And then…

I refuse to throw her away.

Because she’s me.

And I still have to live with her tomorrow.

Maybe somebody reading this needs that tonight.

Maybe you’ve made a mess too.

Maybe fear made you somebody you barely recognized.

Maybe grief came out sideways.

Maybe somebody you love is still angry about something you’ve already cried a thousand tears over.

Don’t demand that they hurry up and forgive you.

Give them room.

Love them enough to let their hurt be real.

But, beloved…

give yourself room to become different too.

Repentance means I don’t have to remain who I was in my worst moment.

God can work with a mess.

Good thing too, because whew…

💩😭😩❤️‍🔥

He and I have had some MATERIAL to work with.

And tonight?

I’m heartbroken.

I’m tired.

I can’t sleep.

I had been trying to prepare posts so I could schedule some daily love and disappear for a little while.

I wanted to leave encouragement behind while I preparedfor Outpatient Therapy next week.

But tonight my heartbreak got louder than my plans.

And for one little moment I wondered:

Who cares about all this anyway?

I do.

There.

That’s my answer.

I do.

I care about the person somewhere crying because somebody they love is angry with them.

I care about the stroke survivor who doesn’t recognize themselves anymore.

I care about the caregiver who got hurt while trying to help.

I care about the family trying to love somebody through something none of them were prepared for.

I care about the person ashamed of how fear changed their behavior.

I care about the one wondering whether they’ve messed things up beyond repair.

And I care about me too.

So I shall keep writing through these tears.

✍️😭❤️‍🔥

And in two days, I begin Outpatient Therapy.

YAAASSS.

I may cry all the way until Tuesday. 😭😩🏃‍♀️

Fine.

I’ll show up with swollen eyes.

I’ll show up tired.

I’ll show up heartbroken.

I’ll show up scared.

But I WILL SHOW UP.

Because healing doesn’t require me to stop hurting before I begin.

Maybe that’s tonight’s lesson.

You can be sorry and still deserve tomorrow.

You can have hurt people and become safer.

You can understand somebody’s anger and grieve the distance between you.

You can lose somebody’s trust for a season without losing your responsibility to become trustworthy.

You can cry while you heal.

And you can begin while your heart is still broken.

💔➡️❤️‍🔥

“A broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.” — Psalm 51:17 KJV

So, God…

Here is mine.

Broken.

Sorry.

Tired.

Terrified.

Still loving.

Still learning.

Still Yours.

And still here.

🙏😭❤️‍🔥

Cassandra Challenge:
Before you condemn yourself for the worst season of your life, ask yourself:

What was happening inside me? What do I need to own? Who deserves an apology? And what can I do differently now?

Don’t use your pain as an excuse.

But don’t use your mistakes as a weapon against yourself either.

Tell the truth.

Make amends where you can.

Learn.

Love.

And begin.

Again.

Victory tonight: I am crying, but I am still writing.

And apparently…

these tears have ink in them. ✍️😭❤️‍🔥

Be encouraged, beloveds.

I’m trying to be too.

Asking for A Friend,
Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: One step. One step. One step. You are loved. You are NOT alone. Keep on being…YOU!

Unapologetically His.
Unapologetically yours.
❤️‍🔥

💔 GOD SAID NO. 🙏🏽😭

August 14, 2026



Beloveds,

I almost gave up.

God said NO. 🙏🏽

I wanted to walk away.

God said NO.

I wanted to run 🏃🏽‍♀️💨, hide, cry, disappear under the covers and tell everybody, “Y’all figure it out. I’m DONE.” 😭💔🤕😵‍💫

And God said:

“HELL TO THE NAH!” 😭🤣🙏🏽

Whew. Okay, Jesus. Message received. 😭👀😂

Today hurt.

Not the cute kind of hurt that fits nicely inside an inspirational quote.

I’m talking about the kind of hurt that makes you wonder how much more your heart can possibly carry. 💔

I cried.

I grieved.

I wanted OUT.

Not out of life.

Out of the pain.

Out of having to be strong.

Out of having to adjust.

Out of having to keep finding courage when I felt like I had already used every last drop. 😢🤕

And somewhere between “God, I can’t do this” and “God, I don’t WANT to do this,” something inside me refused to quit.

I know Who that was. 🙏🏽❤️

God said:

NO.

No, Cassandra, you don’t get to decide the story is over because this chapter hurts.

No, you don’t get to confuse exhaustion with defeat.

No, you don’t get to call yourself finished while I’m still working.

No, you don’t have to understand tonight.

You just have to stay. ❤️‍🩹

📖 Philippians 1:6 KJV

“Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:”

THAT’S IT. 💯🙏🏽

Maybe tonight isn’t about fighting harder.

Maybe tonight isn’t about figuring everything out.

Maybe tonight’s act of faith is ridiculously simple:

GO. TO. BED. 😭🤣🛌

Rest is not quitting.

Crying is not quitting.

Saying “I cannot carry another thing tonight” is not quitting.

Sometimes perseverance looks like marching forward. 💪🏽🔥

And sometimes perseverance looks like crawling underneath the covers, handing tomorrow back to God and saying:

“Your shift, Jesus. I’m clocking out.” 😭🤣🙏🏽🛌

And for my friends who don’t believe as I do, hear the heart of this anyway:

Don’t make permanent conclusions from an exhausted moment.

You don’t have to solve your entire life tonight.

You don’t have to know who you’re becoming tonight.

You don’t even have to feel hopeful tonight.

Rest.

Let morning come before you decide what tomorrow means. ❤️

🏆 TONIGHT’S VICTORY

I almost gave up.

ALMOST.

But almost ain’t DID. 😏💯

I’m still here.

Still hurting. 🤕

Still crying. 😢

Still heartbroken. 💔

Still overwhelmed. 😵‍💫

Still me.

And apparently God and I are not finished yet. 🙏🏽❤️‍🔥

So that’s enough.

Beloved, go to bed. 🛌🥰

The questions can wait.

The grief will still have room tomorrow.

Nothing has to be fixed tonight.

We made it through today.

And that, my friends, is enough. ❤️‍🩹

Goodnight. 🤕😢🏃🏽‍♀️👋🏽💔😵‍💫🛌🙏🏽❤️

Asking for A Friend,
Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

One step. One step. One step. You are loved. You are NOT alone. Keep on being…YOU! ❤️

Last one. I think…

August 14, 2026

💔🌊 JESUS, THERE ARE NOT ENOUGH TEARS IN THE OCEAN

What Do We Do With Our Hearts Now?

Beloveds,

Jesus… 😭💔

There are not enough tears in the ocean for some kinds of heartbreak.

There aren’t enough words.

There aren’t enough prayers that come out neatly.

There aren’t enough “I’m okay”s to make us okay.

Sometimes all we have is:

Ah, God… what do we do with our hearts now? 😭💔🙏🏽

And maybe today somebody reading this is asking another question:

WHO CARES?

Who cares that I am hurting?

Who cares that something I loved has changed?

Who cares that I’m trying to hold myself together while something inside me feels absolutely shattered?

Who cares about the tears I don’t let anybody see?

Who cares when I don’t even have the strength to explain why I’m crying?

For me, the answer is:

YOU DO, JESUS. ❤️

You care.

Not only when I am praising. 💃🏽🙌🏽

Not only when I’m strong. 💪🏽

Not only when I’m encouraging everybody else.

Not only when Cassandra has something funny to say. 😅😂

You care about this Cassandra too.

The one with tears running down her face. 😭

The one whose heart hurts. 💔

The one who doesn’t have a clever lesson wrapped up with a pretty bow today.

The one who can only whisper:

Jesus, please hold what I cannot carry. 🙏🏽😭❤️

And THAT is something I want somebody else to know today.

💔 STOP TRYING TO MAKE GRIEF PRETTY.

Some pain is ugly.

Some grief is confusing.

Sometimes faith sounds like HALLELUJAH! 🙌🏽

And sometimes faith sounds like:

“Jesus…help.”

That’s it.

One word.

Help.

😭🙏🏽

You don’t have to manufacture strength you don’t have.

You don’t have to rush yourself into gratitude because somebody is uncomfortable with your sadness.

You don’t have to turn every tear into a testimony before you’ve even finished crying it.

Sometimes love simply sits beside a broken heart and says:

“I’m staying.” ❤️🫂

And if you’re loving somebody who is hurting today, please don’t make their pain compete with your desire to fix it.

Don’t immediately tell them what lesson they should learn.

Don’t hurry them.

Don’t compare their grief to somebody else’s.

Don’t tell them to “look on the bright side.”

Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is sit there and say:

“I care. I’m here. You don’t have to explain.” 🫂❤️

THAT is love in action. 🎬💞

🙏🏽 FOR THOSE WHO BELIEVE

Jesus Himself wept.

“Jesus wept.” — John 11:35 KJV

Two words.

And I love those two words today.

Because they remind me that tears do not frighten God.

And Scripture says:

“The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart…” — Psalm 34:18 KJV

So today I’m not asking God to pretend my heart isn’t broken.

I’m asking Him to come near it.

Sit with me here, Jesus. 😭🙏🏽

Hold every piece.

Hold the memories.

Hold the questions.

Hold what I understand.

Hold what I absolutely DO NOT understand. 😭💔

And when I don’t know what to do with my heart…

You do. ❤️

💞 AND IF JESUS ISN’T YOUR ANSWER

You are still welcome here.

Your tears matter too.

Your grief doesn’t need my theology before it deserves my compassion.

If today all you can believe is that another human being should care when somebody hurts, start there.

Sit beside somebody.

Listen.

Call.

Text.

Check in.

Be gentle.

And if you’re the one hurting, give yourself permission to say:

“This hurts.”

No apology.

No shame.

No performance.

Just truth. ❤️‍🩹

🌊 TODAY’S LOVE CHALLENGE

Find one hurting heart today.

Maybe it’s somebody else’s.

Maybe it’s yours.

Don’t fix it.

LOVE IT.

Give it room.

Give it patience.

Give it tenderness.

Give it permission to cry. 😭🫂💞

🏆 TODAY’S VICTORY

If you cried and kept breathing…

Victory.

If you admitted, “I’m hurting”

Victory.

If you reached for God…

Victory.

If you reached for another person…

Victory.

If you couldn’t do anything except make it through the last five minutes…

VICTORY. 🏆😭❤️

Because sometimes courage doesn’t roar.

Sometimes courage sits in a puddle of tears and whispers:

“I’m still here.”

And today…

I’m still here. 💔❤️‍🩹🙏🏽

So are you.

Maybe neither one of us knows exactly what to do with our hearts right now.

But we don’t have to figure out the rest of our lives today.

Today we can cry.

Today we can love.

Today we can let ourselves be loved.

And tomorrow?

We’ll take another step.

One step. One step. One step. 👣❤️

Come back. We’re going to keep talking about the HOW of love—how to love when we’re grieving, how to sit with somebody else’s pain without trying to control it, and how to keep a tender heart when life gives us every reason to build a wall around it. 💞🧱➡️❤️

Because love isn’t only what we feel when everything is beautiful.

Sometimes love is what stays when everything hurts.

And Scripture reminds me:

“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.” — 1 Corinthians 13:13 NIV ❤️

Asking for A Friend,
Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: One step. One step. One step. You are loved. You are NOT alone. Keep on being…YOU! 💞😭🙏🏽🥰

💞 IF YOU’RE NOT HERE 🎶❤️‍🔥

August 14, 2026



Who Are YOU Swooning Over? 😍🥰💃🏽

Beloveds,

Ohhhh, here I go again. 😅🎶😍

I absolutely LOVE singing love songs to My Bestie, Jesus. ❤️✝️🥰

And today it’s “If You’re Not Here.”

Because sometimes I hear a love song and immediately think:

Yep. That’s me and Jesus. 🤣😍🙌🏽

I can swoon over Him. 🥰
I can sing terribly loud to Him. 🎤😅
I can cry with Him. 😭❤️
I can laugh with Him. 🤣
I can tell Him when I’m grateful. 🙏🏽
I can tell Him when I’m hurt. 💔
I can even tell Him when I’m confused, irritated, tired, or making an absolute mess of things. 💩😵‍💫🤣

And He stays. ❤️

That’s what gets me.

Not some cleaned-up, polished version of me.

ME.

The laughing me. 🤣
The crying me. 😭
The stubborn me. 😬
The grateful me. 🙏🏽
The heartbroken me. 💔
The hopeful me. 🌱
The Lord, I have absolutely no idea what I’m doing me. 🫠😂

And somehow, through ALL of it, I keep discovering another layer of love.

Maybe that’s one reason love songs hit differently for me now. 🎶💞

I’m not only hearing romance.

I’m hearing presence.

I’m hearing:
I’m here.

I’m hearing:
You don’t have to perform for love.

I’m hearing:
You can bring your whole messy self and still be loved.

WHEW. 😭❤️‍🔥🙌🏽

💡 AND THAT GOT ME THINKING…

Who are YOU swooning over? 😍

Your spouse? 💍❤️
Your sweetheart? 🥰
Your children? 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦
Your family? 💞
Your best friend? 🤗
God? 🙏🏽
Jesus? ✝️❤️
Maybe even LIFE itself after surviving something you weren’t sure you’d make it through? 🌻

And here’s an even bigger question:

Do the people you love KNOW how much you love them? 👀❤️

Because love shouldn’t live only inside our heads.

Sometimes you’ve got to SAY IT. 🗣️💞

Sometimes you’ve got to SHOW IT. 🤗

Sometimes you’ve got to put down the phone, swallow your pride, make the call, give the hug, apologize, forgive, listen, show up, or simply say:

“I’m glad you’re here.” ❤️

That’s part of learning the HOW of love.

Love isn’t merely something we feel.

Love becomes visible through what we DO. 🎬💞

❤️ FOR MY FELLOW BELIEVERS

Jesus said:

“As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you: continue ye in my love.” — John 15:9 KJV

And this one gets me every single time:

“We love him, because he first loved us.” — 1 John 4:19 KJV

THAT’S IT. 😭🙌🏽❤️

I’m swooning over the One who loved me FIRST.

Before I understood love.

Before I got everything right.

Before I learned how to extend grace to myself or anybody else.

He loved me first. 🥹✝️❤️

🌎 AND IF FAITH ISN’T YOUR THING…

You’re still invited into this conversation. 💞

Think about the person—or people—whose presence makes your world a little warmer.

Tell them.

Love them intentionally.

And if nobody comes to mind right now, start by practicing some tenderness toward yourself. ❤️

You are somebody worth treating with compassion too.

😍 TODAY’S LOVE CHALLENGE

Think of ONE person you absolutely adore.

Then don’t merely think about them.

SHOW THEM.

Send the text. 📱❤️
Make the call. ☎️
Give the compliment. 🥰
Say thank you. 🙏🏽
Play your song. 🎶
Tell them exactly what their presence means to you.

And if you’re like me…

Go ahead and serenade Jesus. 🎤✝️🤣😍

He has heard worse. Probably from me THIS MORNING. 😭🤣🤣🤣

🏆 TODAY’S VICTORY

If you loved somebody intentionally today—even in one tiny way—

COUNT IT.

That’s a victory. 🏆💞

We’re learning that love isn’t just the big dramatic stuff.

It’s practiced in little moments, over and over again.

So come along with me as we keep digging into the HOW and WHY of love—how we give it, receive it, repair it, practice it, and become better at showing it. ❤️‍🔥

Because I’m convinced:

LOVE IS SOMETHING WE CAN LEARN TO DO BETTER. 💯❤️

And me?

I’m going back to singing to My Bestie. 😍🎶✝️

Jesus, if You’re listening…

THIS NEXT ONE IS FOR YOU! 🎤🤣🥰❤️‍🔥🙌🏽

Asking for A Friend,
Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: One step. One step. One step. You are loved. You are NOT alone. Keep on being…YOU! 💞🥰🌻

August 14, 2026❤️ EVERY DAY IS HARD…AND SOMEBODY NEEDS YOUR LOVE TODAY ❤️Beloveds,I need to love on some folk today. ❤️🥺🫂Because EVERY DAY IS HARD.Maybe not every day is equally hard.Maybe everybody isn’t carrying the same thing.Maybe what feels unbearable to me wouldn’t feel unbearable to you.But somewhere today, somebody woke up already tired. 😔Somebody smiled while their heart was breaking. 💔Somebody said, “I’m fine,” because explaining what not fine feels like takes more energy than they have.Somebody is grieving a person.Somebody is grieving a relationship.Somebody is grieving their health.Somebody is grieving the person they used to be.Somebody is trying to recognize themselves in a life they never expected to be living. 🥺💔Somebody is angry.Somebody is scared.Somebody is lonely.Somebody messed up yesterday and is wondering if they deserve another chance today.Somebody believes in God and is asking Him, “Lord, how much longer?” 🙏🏽😭Somebody doesn’t believe in God at all and is still whispering into the darkness, “Please…something has to get better.”And somebody doesn’t have words for ANY of it.So today, I don’t want to give you some cute little speech about smiling through everything.Nah. 👀❤️Sometimes life HURTS.I know something about waking up and realizing the battle didn’t disappear while I slept.I know something about having to find courage when I don’t particularly FEEL courageous.I know something about heartbreak. 💔😢And I am learning that courage isn’t always standing on top of a mountain yelling, “I WON!” 🏆Sometimes courage is lying there thinking:This is hard.I am hurting.I don’t know how today is going to go.But I’m still here.And sometimes STILL HERE is the victory. ❤️‍🩹💪🏽❤️ SO HOW DO WE LOVE SOMEBODY THROUGH A HARD DAY?We stop assuming we know what people are carrying.We listen before trying to fix.We give people room to be human.We apologize when we’re wrong.We forgive when we can.We check on the strong friend. 👀We don’t make somebody prove their pain before we offer compassion.We don’t compare suffering.And sometimes we simply say:“I see you.”“You don’t have to perform for me.”“You don’t have to make me comfortable with your pain.”“You matter today—even hurting.” 🫂❤️And here’s another one I’m learning:❤️ LOVE YOURSELF THAT WAY TOO.Whew. 😭👀Because some of us will give everybody else grace and then turn around and talk to ourselves like we owe ourselves money. 🤣😩NOPE.If today is hard, acknowledge that today is hard.That isn’t quitting.That isn’t weakness.That isn’t failure.That’s telling yourself the truth.Then ask:What is the next loving thing I can do?Not the next 50 things. 😵‍💫ONE.Drink some water.Rest.Call somebody.Cry.Pray.Sit quietly.Laugh at something ridiculous. 🤣Tell somebody you love them.Forgive yourself for not having everything figured out before lunchtime. 👀🤣❤️One loving choice can change the direction of a hard moment.🙏🏽 FOR MY FOLK WHO BELIEVEGod never promised me that every day would feel good.But He did promise I wouldn’t have to walk through it alone.“The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.” — Psalm 34:18 KJVAnd this one is sitting close to my heart today:“Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you.” — 1 Peter 5:7 KJVSo, Father, today I give You the stuff I cannot carry gracefully.The tears.The fear.The frustration.The heartbreak. 💔The questions.The exhaustion.The things I don’t understand.And the things I don’t even know how to say.Please love on Your people today.Find the person crying behind a closed door.Find the person smiling while falling apart.Find the caregiver who is tired.Find the person who feels misunderstood.Find the lonely one.Find the frightened one.Find ME.And remind us that hard days do not mean love has abandoned us.Amen. 🙏🏽❤️❤️ AND IF FAITH ISN’T YOUR THING…You are still welcome here.No sermon required.No pretending required.No explanation required.I hope somebody handles your heart gently today.I hope you handle your own heart gently too.I hope one small moment reminds you that pain is not the only thing that exists.There is still kindness.There is still laughter.There are still people capable of showing up.There is still tomorrow.And YOU ARE STILL HERE. ❤️‍🩹💞 TODAY’S LOVE CHALLENGEFind ONE PERSON and love on them intentionally.Text them.Call them.Sit beside them.Tell them something good you see in them.Ask, “How are you REALLY doing?”Then be quiet long enough to hear the answer. 🫂And don’t forget yourself.Look at yourself—even if today you feel like a hot mess wrapped in exhaustion with a side order of WHAT IN THE WORLD?! 😵‍💫🤣👀And say:“Today is hard. But I will not make it harder by being cruel to myself.”THAT is love too. ❤️🏆 TODAY’S VICTORYIf you got up hurting and you’re still trying…Victory. 🏆If you cried and kept going…Victory. 🏆If all you could manage today was admitting, “I’m not okay”…Victory. 🏆If you showed somebody love while your own heart needed some…Baby, that counts too. ❤️‍🩹Every day is hard in somebody’s world.So let’s stop making people earn tenderness.Let’s stop waiting for perfect circumstances to love one another.LOVE SOMEBODY TODAY.And please…include yourself. ❤️❤️❤️We’re going to keep talking about the HOW of love—how to listen, how to apologize, how to forgive, how to show compassion, how to love when we’re hurting, and how to keep growing when we’d rather run away. 👀😩🤣❤️Come walk with me.We’re learning together.We’re loving together.And on the days when somebody doesn’t have enough strength to carry hope…Maybe the rest of us can help hold it for a minute. 🫂❤️‍🩹🙏🏽Asking for A Friend,Cassandra#YourLifeMattersToMeNote: One step. One step. One step. ❤️You are loved.You are NOT alone.Keep on being…YOU! ❤️🥰🫂💯

Have been listening to this 🎵 on repeat. Beautiful. 💔💔🤕

No pretending. I would pay legit money for a hug from someone who loves me. Having a ministry of loving a world that 🌎 won’t love me back hurts. Especially today.

Cassandra

August 14, 2026 💔😭 GOD, WHAT DO I DO WITH MY BROKEN HEART?

For Me—and Everybody Else Who Is Crying

Today 🫂💞 Beloveds, today I need comfort.

Not a lecture. Not somebody telling me how strong I am.

Not somebody rushing me toward the bright side.

Comfort. 🫂💔

Because today… I am devastated. 😭😭😭

And before somebody mistakes my tears for surrender, let me make something very clear:

I AM NOT DISCOURAGED.

I have not quit. I have not stopped believing. I have not decided my life has no purpose.

I have not stopped trusting God.

My heart just hurts. Badly. 💔😢

And maybe somebody reading this needs permission to understand the difference.

You can have hope… and hurt.

You can trust God… and cry.

You can know you’re going to keep going… and wish with everything inside you that you didn’t have to go through this.

You can be grateful for your life… and grieve what has changed in it.

You can say, “God is good.” and then put your face in your hands and sob. 😭🙏🏽 Those things can live in the same heart.

I know because today… they are living in mine. 💔❤️‍🩹 — 😭

GOD…I MISS ME.

There. I said it.  Sometimes grief isn’t only about losing somebody else. Sometimes you grieve yourself. The person you remember. The things you used to do without thinking about them.

The ordinary pieces of life you never imagined you would one day miss.

And some days the difference between then and now hits harder than others.

Today is one of those days for me. 💔🧠😭

My symptoms are really bad today. And sometimes when things are especially difficult, grief comes knocking again.

Not necessarily because I’ve lost hope. Sometimes because I remember. I remember ME.

And there are pieces of that woman I miss so terribly that I don’t have prettier words for it.

I just… miss her. 😭😭😭

And God, if I’m going to walk this road, I need You to help me understand something:

What do I do with all this LOVE I have for the life I remember? What do I do with the memories? What do I do with the frustration? What do I do when my heart screams: “I WANT IT BACK!”

💔😭🙏🏽 — 🫂

MAYBE I DON’T HAVE TO “DO” ANYTHING WITH IT TODAY.

Maybe that is part of the lesson. Maybe every painful emotion doesn’t immediately require an assignment.

Maybe sometimes grief needs permission to simply be grief.

Today I hurt. Period. No explanation required. No apology required. No inspirational ending required.

I can sit before God and say: “Father, Your daughter is hurting today.” 🙏🏽😭 That’s enough.

And if you don’t believe as I do, perhaps your words are simply:

“Today hurts.” That’s enough too. You don’t owe anybody a performance of strength. 🫂💞 —

🙏🏽 GOD, PLEASE SIT WITH ME HERE. I don’t need You only in my victories. I need You here. In this.

In the tears. In the questions. In the memories. In the frustration. In the moments when I am tired of having to be courageous.

In the moments when I don’t want another lesson. In the moments when I don’t want my pain turned into purpose yet.

Sometimes, God… I just want my heart held. 💔🙏🏽🫂

Your Word says: “The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart…” — Psalm 34:18 KJV

Then please… come near.

Not tomorrow when I’m feeling inspirational again. Not after I’ve dried my tears. Not after I’ve figured out what I’m supposed to learn. NOW.

Come sit with the crying woman. 😭🙏🏽 — 💔

AND TO SOMEBODY CRYING WITH ME TODAY… Come sit over here. 🫂

You don’t have to explain everything. You don’t even have to talk. I won’t tell you to cheer up. I won’t tell you everything happens for a reason.

I won’t tell you somebody else has it worse. I won’t tell you that you should be grateful because at least you still have ______.

No. Your heartbreak gets to be your heartbreak. 😭💔

Maybe somebody died. Maybe somebody left. Maybe your health changed. Maybe your family changed. Maybe a dream died.

Maybe you received news that knocked the wind out of you.

Maybe you’re grieving a version of yourself you desperately want back. Maybe you don’t even know WHY you’re crying.

You’re just tired. Come anyway. 🫂💞 There is room beside me. — 😭

CRY. Yes. CRY. I mean the ugly one too. The runny-nose, swollen-eyes, can’t-get-the-sentence-out kind. 😭😭😭😩🫠 Cry if you need to.

Because tears aren’t always saying: “I give up.” Sometimes tears are saying: “This mattered.” “I loved deeply.” “I wanted something different.” “I’m disappointed.” “I’m exhausted.” “I miss what was.” “I need somebody to hold me.”

And sometimes… tears don’t say anything at all. They just fall. Let them. 💧💧💧 — ❤️‍🩹

THEN LOVE THE PERSON WHO IS CRYING.

That person is YOU. This is where the HOW of love matters. We talk so much about loving everybody else.

But what does love look like when the person falling apart is staring back at us in the mirror? Maybe love says:

“You don’t have to accomplish anything impressive today.” Maybe love says: “Rest.” Maybe love says: “Eat something.”

Maybe love says: “Call somebody safe.”

Maybe love says: “Turn the music on.” 🎶

Maybe love says: “Pray.” 🙏🏽

Maybe love says: “Laugh if something ridiculous happens—even while you’re crying.” 😂😭

And maybe love simply whispers: “I am staying with you through this.” ❤️‍🩹 — 🙏🏽

MY PRAYER FROM A BROKEN HEART:

God, I don’t have a polished prayer today. My heart hurts. You already know why. You know every thought I haven’t found words for. You know what I miss.

You know what I’m afraid to lose. You know what I wish were different. You know the parts of this journey I would NEVER have chosen. 😭🙏🏽

So I’m bringing You exactly what I have. A broken heart. Take it. Hold it.

Please don’t let pain make me bitter. Don’t let grief steal my capacity to love. Don’t let what I have lost make me unable to see what remains.

And when I cannot understand what You are doing… help me trust Your heart. 💔🙏🏽❤️‍🩹

And Father… if this truly is being asked of me… then You already know what I’m going to say. 😭💪🏽 I CAN.

Not because it is easy. I WILL.

Not because I wanted this. I MUST.

Because there is still purpose inside this beating heart. 🙏🏽❤️‍🩹

But God… please hold me while I do it. Amen. —

💞 FOR THOSE WHO PRAY DIFFERENTLY—or DON’T PRAY AT ALL…

May you give yourself permission today to be human. May you stop measuring your strength by how rarely you cry.

May you recognize that grief and hope can occupy the same body. May you treat yourself gently while your heart is hurting.

And may somebody remind you: You do not have to solve your whole life today.

Just stay with today. 🫂💞 — 🌱

TODAY’S LOVE CHALLENGE :

Find somebody—including yourself—who needs comfort. And resist the urge to FIX them. Sit. Listen. Hold a hand.

Send a message. Let them cry. Say: “You don’t have to be okay with me.” That’s love too. 💞🫂 — 🏆 TODAY’S VICTORY

Maybe today’s victory isn’t getting back up immediately. Maybe today’s victory is finally admitting: “This broke my heart.” 💔

And discovering that after saying it… your heart is still beating. ❤️‍🩹 Mine is. It hurts like crazy today. But it’s beating.

And apparently it still has enough life left in it to love somebody else who is crying.

So if you’re crying today… you can borrow some of mine. 💞 I’ll sit with you. You sit with me. We don’t have to pretend. We don’t have to hurry.

And when we’re ready… not when somebody else decides we should be ready… we’ll take another step. 👣 Then another. 👣 And another. 👣 Crying if necessary. Laughing when we can. 😂😭💞

Praying when we have words. 🙏🏽 Sitting quietly when we don’t. 🫂 And believing that a broken heart can still hold an astonishing amount of love.

💔❤️‍🩹💞 Asking for A Friend,

Cassandra #YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: One step. One step. One step. You are loved. You are NOT alone. Keep on being…YOU! 💔❤️‍🩹🙏🏽🫂💞

And God? I’m still here. I’m crying. I’m hurting. I’m heartbroken. But I’m still here. If this is being asked of me… I CAN. I WILL. I MUST. Just… hold my hand while I do it. 😭🙏🏽🤝🏽❤️‍🩹

GOD HAS THE FINAL WORD | Your Story Isn’t Over | Heartfelt Gospel R&B Wo…

Beloveds,

Somebody needs this today.  I know I did. Be encouraged. You are loved and appreciated and not alone. 💞😍👋💋😊😅

Cassandra

August 10, 2026❤️ When You KNOW You’re Wrong…But You Still Don’t Want to Admit It

HOW to Get Past the Battle Between Your Pride & Your Integrity

Beloveds,

Okay…we talked about being wrong and actually admitting it.

But let’s get REAL.

Because sometimes the problem isn’t that we don’t KNOW we’re wrong.

WE KNOW.

Oh, we KNOW.

You replay the conversation in your head…

You know what you said.
You know what you did.
You know how you handled it.

And somewhere deep down inside, there’s a little voice saying:

“Yeah…you probably shouldn’t have done that.”

And your pride says:

“SHHHHHHHHHH!”

Ohhhhh, the struggle!

Because now you’ve got a battle going on inside:

❤️ Integrity: “Go apologize.”

Pride: “Absolutely NOT.”

❤️ Integrity: “You were wrong.”

Pride: “They were wrong too!”

❤️ Integrity: “That doesn’t change YOUR part.”

Pride: “But they need to apologize first!”

COME ON!

Have you ever been there?!

Because I have.

And let me tell you something:

Knowing you’re wrong and being willing to admit you’re wrong are two different skills.

That’s why we’re learning the HOW.

❤️ HOW DO YOU GET YOURSELF TO ADMIT YOU’RE WRONG?

1️⃣ STOP TRYING TO WIN.

Sometimes we aren’t trying to solve the problem.

We’re trying to win the argument.

And baby…

You can WIN the argument and LOSE the relationship.

You can prove your point…

and still hurt somebody.

You can have facts…

and still lack compassion.

You can be technically correct…

and still handle the situation completely wrong.

So ask yourself:

“Am I trying to make this right—or am I trying to make myself right?”

WHEW.

That’s a question worth sitting with.

2️⃣ OWN YOUR PART WITHOUT WAITING FOR THEM TO OWN THEIRS.

This one is HARD.

Because our pride loves keeping score.

“Well, THEY did this!”

Maybe they did.

But their behavior belongs to them.

Your behavior belongs to YOU.

You don’t have to wait for somebody else to become accountable before you become accountable.

That’s maturity.

❤️

3️⃣ DON’T MAKE YOUR APOLOGY A NEGOTIATION.

An apology isn’t:

“I’ll apologize if you apologize.”

That’s not an apology.

That’s a hostage negotiation.

You apologize because you have something to apologize for.

Whether they apologize back is between them and their conscience.

4️⃣ LEARN TO SAY THESE THREE WORDS:

“I was wrong.”

That’s it.

No dissertation.

No 47-page defense brief. 

No historical timeline beginning in 1987.

Just:

“I was wrong.”

And then…

“I’m sorry.”

That’s powerful.

5️⃣ DON’T CONFUSE SHAME WITH ACCOUNTABILITY.

This is important.

Admitting:

“I did something wrong”

does NOT mean:

“I am a horrible person.”

Those are two different things.

Healthy accountability says:

“I made a mistake, and I can learn from it.”

Shame says:

“I made a mistake, therefore I AM the mistake.”

Nope.

We don’t have to destroy ourselves to take responsibility.❤️

We can own it.

Repair it.

Learn from it.

And grow.

AND SOMETIMES…

The apology you need to make isn’t even the hardest part.

The hardest part is changing the behavior afterward.

Because anybody can say:

“I’m sorry.”

But what happens the NEXT time you’re angry?

What happens the NEXT time you feel disrespected?

What happens the NEXT time your pride gets poked?

That’s where we’re going to learn something important:

An apology is not the finish line.

It’s the beginning of accountability.❤️

Because I don’t want us to become people who are really good at saying:

“Sorry.”

I want us to become people who are learning:

HOW to recognize our patterns.


HOW to regulate ourselves.


HOW to communicate when we’re hurt.


HOW to listen without preparing our defense.


HOW to disagree without destroying each other.


HOW to repair what we’ve damaged.


HOW to forgive without pretending nothing happened.


HOW to love people while still holding healthy boundaries.

THAT’S the work.

And we’re going to do it together. ❤️

YOUR HOMEWORK:

The next time you KNOW you were wrong but your pride says:

“Don’t you dare apologize!”

Don’t immediately react.

Stop.

Breathe.

Ask yourself:

“What would integrity ask me to do right now?”

Then listen.

Not to your pride.

Not to your fear.

Not to your need to win.

Listen to what is true.

And if you’re wrong?

Baby…

BE WRONG WELL. ❤️

Admit it.

Apologize.

Make it right where you can.

Change what needs changing.

And keep growing.

Because we’re not chasing perfection over here.

We’re practicing love.

And love isn’t just something we FEEL.

We’re learning the HOW. ❤️

───

❤️ COME WALK THIS PATH WITH ME

If you’re tired of inspirational words that tell you WHAT to do but never teach you HOW to actually do it…

FOLLOW ALONG. ❤️

Because that’s what we’re going to be doing here.

We’re going to talk about the uncomfortable stuff.

The pride.

The fear.

The anger.

The hurt.

The forgiveness.

The boundaries.

The communication.

The mistakes.

The repair.

The REAL LIFE stuff.

And we’re going to learn HOW to love better—not just talk about love better. ❤️

COMING UP: We’re going to talk about HOW to apologize without making excuses…

Because, Lord have mercy…

“I’m sorry, BUT…”

is sometimes where a perfectly good apology goes to DIE.

We’re going there.

And we’re going to learn HOW to listen when somebody tells us we’ve hurt them—without immediately becoming defensive.

Yep.

We’re going there too. ❤️

So…

Follow me.

Come learn with me.

Come laugh with me.

Come grow with me.

And when you realize you’re a knucklehead sometimes…

WELCOME TO THE CLUB. ❤️

Asking for A Friend, Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe ❤️

NOTE: You don’t have to be perfect to be worthy of love.

You just have to be willing to be honest, own what belongs to you, learn from your mistakes, and keep growing.

One step. One step. One step. You are loved. You are NOT alone. Keep on being…YOU! ❤️

Thankful.

Nuff Said.

Cassandra…*sigh *…