The silence was loud today. It was jealous, in fact. It wanted me for itself.
The silence chastised me all day. It asked me why I was so silent. It asked me why I was not questioning things.
I’ve been craving the stillness. Life has been so loud the past two years. I wanted to bask in the quiet. I wanted to see what the quiet has to say to me. Too much is lost in the noise.
Yet the silence began to yell at me. It asked me to move. It challenges me to move forward.
The silence is loud today. I’m trying to listen. I’m trying to learn from it.
I just stopped by to encourage someone today. Starting with me. Life is what we make it. Still so much of us. Use the noise to keep us distracted from living a real, full and honest life.
We often feel lacking. We have often been made to feel as though we are lacking in something. In some form or fashion. I created this blog as a safe place to let people know that they were loved and not alone. I wanted people to know that it’s OK to be still in silent.
I spent my birthday in silence. It was really nice. I let my heart breathe. I let my soul stop moving about. I let my heart feel whatever it wanted to feel. In the stillness. In the silence. I’m gonna try to do that everyday for the rest of my life.
I wonder where life will take me. I’m gonna do my best to enjoy the journey every step of the way. I’m sitting here drinking my coffee and listening to the silence. She is loud today…
still, Cassandra
#YourLifeMattersToMe
Note: After the tornado, I was so angry at God for not letting me move forward and start working right away. I’m so glad he didn’t listen to me. I was so tired. I needed the rest. I have been working myself into the ground for decades. I was doing a disservice to myself.
If you are like me and working yourself into the ground, I urge you to stop. You only have one life to live. Living it so exhausted you can barely scrape yourself out of bed. It’s helping no one.
Perhaps you as well need to listen to the silence. What is yours saying to you? If no one has told you yet today, I love you and care about your life.
I used to think that life was all about getting the trophy. I used to think real success did not happen unless you had large crowds cheering you on. I used to believe true success did not come if he did not have. Some of their waiting at the end to embrace you.
I have learned, through all these hard days, that I have been my biggest champion. I have experienced, through all the hell from the past two years, that God has been My Biggest Cheerleader. I have experience, first hand., The universe has championed me when no one else would… even me.
Through all these lonely days, I have learned to be there for me. I have held my tears. I have comforted my heart. I have resurrected and fought for my dreams. I am thankful for the hard. Hard brought me back to me.
I enjoy the journey now. All of it. The sad days. The quiet days. The unfulfilling days. The lonely days. The wandering days. The wondering days.
As we speak, I am drinking a cup of coffee in the birthday mug my niece gave me. So satisfying. I spent my birthday alone. At first. I was terribly lonely. I wondered if I had been loved. I felt unloved. I felt unlovely. Yet only for just a moment. That was just old voices speaking to me.
My new voice told me that I was altogether lovely. My new voice told me to enjoy my birthday. I spent the day in quiet and solitude. I made myself birthday bacon and eggs. I drank coffee. I watched old Youtube movies. I was still.
I just stopped by to encourage someone. Starting with me. Enjoy the journey. We only get this one go around. Yeah, I know life can be hard. Times are tough all over. Still, there is so much to be thankful for. To be grateful for.
I am thankful for every person who stops by. You could be doing anything, but you chose to spend a few minutes with me. I am honored. I just want you to know how much I love you and care about your life. I truly do. I pray for each and everyone of you every single day. I don’t know how much that means to some. It means the world to me.
I will continue to ensure for the world every single day. Every single one. This world needs love. This world needs light. This world needs truth. I shall endeavor to provide a light as best as I can. Be encouraged.
I am grateful this morning. I just got notification that the equipment has shipped for my new job. Orientation is in two weeks. The time is flying by.
I just wanted to stop by and thank those who have encouraged me over these last almost 18 months. I will have been out of work for 17 months. If I had a nickel for every tear I cried, I could have retired a long time ago.
I just wanna say thank you for those who encouraged me to keep on keeping on. It took more than a year just to get one legitimate job I could apply for. That can play with your mind. It played with mine.
Still, I wouldn’t change these days for anything. I have learned so many lessons in this time. I was introduced to my tenacity. I got to meet the greatness inside of me.
Now, beloveds, I take that tenacity and greatness into my future. I plan on enjoying this job. I look forward to it. I look forward to the hard days. I ready to embrace the boring days. I look forward to laughing at the frustrating days.
I won’t name any names. You know who you are. I thank you. I appreciate you. You help me keep going when I wanted to quit. I’m glad I hung in there. I’m grateful for your words. I appreciated your empathy. Your words meant a lot to me.
I encourage anyone who is still looking for a job to hang in there. I encourage those who are working and who are mighty tired to hang in there. I encourage everyone who is discouraged about the times right now. Be encouraged.
Life is what we make it. We are so much more than what we do. We are more than our bank account. Take some time for you today. Love yourself today.
asking for A Friend, Cassandra
#YourLifeMattersToMe
Note: I woke up with a song in my heart. I have been enjoying my coffee. I have been enjoying encouraging people this morning. I have already done my meal prep. I am singing badly to my positive music. I am considering having a 3rd cup of coffee. What a wonderful life.
Lift up your head. Look around you. What do you see? The boogeyman has nothing but noise. Get out there and enjoy your life.
God: Why must you DO anything? This has been a hard year. Go have fun.
Me: I have been so busy fighting, so busy trying, so busy being about being about it, I don’t know HOW not to DO.
God: Ah.
Me: Aha! So, what do I do now.
God: Smh. Who’s on first…🤣🥰.
Only those who have a bit of age on them will understand “Who’s on first”. To the rest of you, look the skit up on YouTube. A classic I am telling you. 🥰😁
I’m learning how to have fun. Life is not meant to be one big skirmish. It’s meant to be love. It’s meant to be embraced.
More of us needs to learn how to have fun. I was raised to work. Hard. All the time. There was no time for breaks. Breaks were for chumps! I was taught to wind myself into the ground. Then get up and do it again. Everyday. All day.
A tornado sat me down. I’m glad. I was exhausted.
I just stopped by to tell someone to sit down and have some fun. Put down the broom. Put away the toolkit. Work will work when it’s time. Rest. Play. Be encouraged.
asking for A Friend, Cassandra
#YourLifeMattersToMe
Note: What are you still doing here???? Get out there and play in a mud puddle or something…
Note: Love one another. We are NOT transactions to be suffered through. We are NOT Mark’s to be taken advantage of. We are NOT thoughtless beasts with no room for growth, change, and love.
We ARE all:
Flawed.
Different.
Indifferent, at times.
Still, se are all we got. Yet, we are all we need…
Okay, beloveds, I am being a tad bit melodramatic. The old me would have been:
Flabbergasted.
Frustrated.
Utterly disgusted.
Why? Because I am having to use some free stuff that has been quite limiting towards the huge dreams I am trying to implement and get down on paper. Visually. Chronologically.
Only, much laptop does not have too terribly much power. Also, the freebie software is limited for a reason. I have plans to upgrade once I start working and earning a steady check.
In the meantime, I understand I am sacrificing time and using what I currently have. I am NOT, however, wasting time wishing I had upgraded things.
The old me would have done just that: wasted time lamenting and not taking advantage of what I DO have.
I just stopped to encourage someone to use what you have. Don’t waste time fussing about what you don’t have. Make use of what you do have. Make it work. Make something new out of it. Make something productive out of it.
I hear a cup of coffee calling. Who is up for a cup?
Why Can't I Be Loud?! 