Heart check time!
Time for you to STOP and tend to YOUR heart.
You have spent your life tending to others. Take a breath. Take a break.
I had to take a break, yesterday. Healing is NOT easy or simple. Doable but yikes!
Am still working on the third piece of…nevermind. Taking a breather from THAT hard and scrounging round, in my heart, for other things to inspire or work the last nerves, know what I mean?
Work is STILL working my nerves. Tech issues that are even driving the tech team up 10 walls. Issue had to be escalated higher.
I am learning sooooooo much about ME as we work through this. It’s like my lagging and stuck system has been an example of how my life is going: lagging, unable to move forward due to things outside my control, needing assistance from a Higher Team, to diagnose and fix the ROOT CAUSES of things.
In the past, I used to get sooooooooo angry with God, with Life, with The Universe, with EVERYTHING and EVERYBODY, when things were difficult.
Instead of embracing the hard, I stared at hard mountain and:
Told myself this or that was just too hard, to attempt. So I didn’t try.
Fussed, er, asked God, WHY, why, why and why this, that and the other thing. So, I wouldn’t try.
Cried, er, wondered aloud to Life, WHY, why, why and why was LIFE DOING BEING SO UNFAIR?! So, I refused to try.
Lamented, forlornly, to The Universe as to WHY, why, why and why this, that and the other thing happened to ME?! SO, I was too tired to try.
After a while, I found myself too afraid to try.
So, I tried. Hard. For, others. For, work. For, family. For, friends. For, ministry.
I do NOT regret those tries. I just wish I had believed enough in ME, to try so hard FOR me.
I do now.
I don’t regret the time it took.
Why?
Because that is simply how long it took me to find the COURAGE to face…ME!
I have been astonished with how loving and giving and receiving my heart has been, to me.
We are so many things, all at once. Our bodies house our heart, mind, soul and spirit. The work is getting them all the get some act right and start working WITH one another and not fighting me.
Anywho, whilst I am waiting for tech, to reach out, I figured I would reach out and do a heart check.
Be encouraged, beloveds. As you keep moving forward, give yourself the time and space to breathe and PROCESS.
I am, now, beginning to feel and process things, as an adult, that I stored away, as a child and angry adult. Now, I can breathe and reflect and unpack.
It has not been fun. Yet, I am at peace. And, as I process and move FORWARD, I am enjoying the hard. It keeps showing me different parts, of ME, I had no clue was there.
I am enjoying meeting me.
Enjoy who you are, beloveds. ALL of you. Forgive yourself for not being where you thought you should and could be. You are EXACTLY where you are. Period. Why you are there is besides the point.
If you are not satisfied with WHERE you are, use the dissatisfaction to your advantage. Start asking yourself why. Start reaching out to The Universe.
I mean it. Literally. Ask, outloud:
“Universe, why are you pestering my heart for?”
Then, ask YOU, what you want and NEED for The Universe to give YOU?
What do YOU want and need?
You will be amazed at what your heart will tell you. IF you find the courage to ASK and LISTEN.
This should scare the holy crackers out of you. If it does not, beloveds, your heart is still sleep. Wake him/her/it up, then ask.
In the meantime, cut yourself some slack whilst living, in the meantime, between your dreams and reality colliding.
Be encouraged. Tell someone, starting with you:
You are loved.
You are NOT alone.
Keep on being…YOU!
One step.
One step.
One step.
asking with you,
Cassandra
#YourLifeMattersToMe
- BELOVEDS, YOU CAN HAVE MY FLOWERS. I DON’T NEED THEM ANYMORE.
- Forgive them, Cassandra, God said to me
- Still In Love
- REAL TALK: DESPISE NOT SMALL BEGINNINGS, BELOVEDS.👘🦺🥾👟🥿👞🩴👢🩰👡⛑️🔌🕯️🔎🖌️🖋️📢
- IT ME!
Why Can't I Be Loud?! 