I am not strong.

I am relentless.

I walk.

I run.

I pursue my dreams, relentlessly.

I press forward, towards the high calling.

Of, that, of He, of What, of Who calls me.

I know that as I move, They also move, with and for me.

Forward.

I move.

Not counting steps.

Not worrying about time.

Enjoying EVERY precious, priceless, pause in the receiving and experiencing of my dreams.

I am not strong.

Yet, I am relentless.

I shall never give up on me.

I shall never give up in my dreams.

I pursue.

Relentlessly.

I press on.

I move forward.

I strive.

I strain.

I am not strong.

I am relentless.

Give me my bounty!

Give it here!

The ONLY thing that shall keep me from pursuing is…..NOTHING!

I am not strong.

I am relentless.

Ah, God. Help me make my dreams come true!

asking for a friend,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note:

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

• 📫 BE HONEST WITH THEM. FOR, ME. ❤️‍🩹Beloveds,I have been thinking about honesty.Not the kind we demand from everybody else.The kind that requires us to sit with ourselves long enough to tell the truth about what is happening inside us.👀Because sometimes the hardest person to be honest with is yourself.Sometimes we know something hurts, but we keep calling it fine.Sometimes we know we are tired, but we keep calling ourselves lazy.Sometimes we know we need help, but we keep calling needing help weakness.Sometimes we know something has changed, but we keep trying to live as though nothing did.And sometimes we are so busy trying to make everybody else comfortable with our reality that we stop being honest about our own.❤️‍🩹I have had to learn this in ways I never wanted to learn it.My life changed.My body changed.My speech changed.My independence changed.The amount of effort required to do ordinary things changed.And there have been moments when I wanted so badly to be the Cassandra I remembered that I became impatient with the Cassandra who was actually here.But she deserves honesty too.She deserves tenderness too.She deserves patience too.She deserves to be loved without having to pretend that everything is easy.🪑So I am learning to tell the truth.I can be grateful and tired.I can have faith and still have questions.I can laugh and still hurt.I can celebrate progress and grieve what changed.I can be strong and need help.I can love people and still need boundaries.I can forgive somebody and still acknowledge what happened.I can believe God is with me without pretending every part of this journey feels good.Those truths do not cancel each other.They can sit in the same room.Sometimes they can even sit in the same chair.👀🪑And maybe somebody reading this needs permission to stop performing too.You do not have to tell everybody everything.Privacy is not dishonesty.Boundaries are not dishonesty.Taking time before you speak is not dishonesty.But beloved, please find somewhere you can tell the truth.Even if the first place is inside your own heart.Say:This hurt me.I miss what was.I am angry.I am afraid.I need help.I don’t know yet.I changed my mind.I need more time.I am proud of myself.I survived something difficult.I am learning.I am healing.I am still here.🔑Because honesty can be a key.A key that unlocks shame.A key that loosens the chain of pretending.A key that lets grief breathe.A key that allows joy to be real instead of performed.A key that makes room for healing.And sometimes the truth is not:”I have figured everything out.”Sometimes the truth is simply:”I am trying.”And beloved?Trying counts.❤️‍🩹I am learning not to require perfection from myself before I offer myself compassion.I am learning not to make recovery another place where I have to perform.I am learning that one difficult day does not erase every good day that came before it.I am learning that needing rest does not erase determination.I am learning that receiving help does not erase independence.And I am learning that being honest about what hurts does not mean I have stopped believing that healing is possible.It means I stopped requiring myself to lie on the way there.👀So be honest with them when honesty is safe.Be honest with the people who love you.Be honest with the people helping you.Be honest about what you need.Be honest about what you cannot do today.Be honest about what you are learning to do again.But before all of that—Be honest with you.For me.❤️‍🩹Because I want you here.Not the polished version.Not the pretending version.Not the version exhausted from convincing everybody that everything is fine.YOU.The learning you.The healing you.The laughing you.The crying you.The figuring-it-out-as-you-go you.There is room for that person here.🪑Pull up a chair.You don’t have to resolve everything before you belong.You don’t have to perform strength before you are loved.You don’t have to have all the answers before your life matters.Your life matters right now.Exactly here.One step.One step.One step.🔑❤️‍🩹🪑Asking for A Friend,Cassandra#YourLifeMattersToMeNote: One step. One step. One step. You are loved. You are NOT alone. Keep on being…YOU!
• THE CHAIR.
• WEDNESDAY 🌎
• WEDNESDAY 🌎
• MOM, WOMBIE, LET’S LOVE THE WORLD TOGETHER. 🌎❤️‍🔥

Self!

Care!

Back away from the chocolate donuts, Cassandra!

That’s what I told myself as stressful circumstances, stressed, er, stretched me to the point I wanted to stress my way to some chocolate donut eating old ways.

I’m currently getting my act right to act right. I have done more comfort eating then I care to admit.

Last week, I got back to getting up early and preparing breakfast.

Good habits take over when we give them room to. At first, it was tough getting up early again.

I used to get up two hours early. I had to. I liked to arrive to work an hour early. I enjoyed a bit of chillaxing before getting into the work day.

Since working from home, I eventually allowed lazy into talking me out of my one hour chillaxing time.

Wonder of wonders, this led to a bit of the grumps as I gave myself more sleep and less me time. Which just made me tired and grumpy.

I had forgotten how much fun it is to slurp endlessly on ☕ coffee and yakking with God until it’s time to be about being about it.

So much so, beloveds, I have found myself doing so on my days off. I have popped out of bed, even earlier!

Slurping ☕ coffee.

Yakking with God.

Yakking with you.

Today is my day off. Yet, I beat the sun up this morning. What shall I do with this day?

I hear a good nap calling.🥰🤗😂

Take care of yourselves, beloveds. You only have one you. Get up and make 🥣 breakfast. Restart your good habits. Dust off old dreams. Get on out there and live. Asking for A Friend.

doing thangs with you,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note:

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

• 📫 BE HONEST WITH THEM. FOR, ME. ❤️‍🩹Beloveds,I have been thinking about honesty.Not the kind we demand from everybody else.The kind that requires us to sit with ourselves long enough to tell the truth about what is happening inside us.👀Because sometimes the hardest person to be honest with is yourself.Sometimes we know something hurts, but we keep calling it fine.Sometimes we know we are tired, but we keep calling ourselves lazy.Sometimes we know we need help, but we keep calling needing help weakness.Sometimes we know something has changed, but we keep trying to live as though nothing did.And sometimes we are so busy trying to make everybody else comfortable with our reality that we stop being honest about our own.❤️‍🩹I have had to learn this in ways I never wanted to learn it.My life changed.My body changed.My speech changed.My independence changed.The amount of effort required to do ordinary things changed.And there have been moments when I wanted so badly to be the Cassandra I remembered that I became impatient with the Cassandra who was actually here.But she deserves honesty too.She deserves tenderness too.She deserves patience too.She deserves to be loved without having to pretend that everything is easy.🪑So I am learning to tell the truth.I can be grateful and tired.I can have faith and still have questions.I can laugh and still hurt.I can celebrate progress and grieve what changed.I can be strong and need help.I can love people and still need boundaries.I can forgive somebody and still acknowledge what happened.I can believe God is with me without pretending every part of this journey feels good.Those truths do not cancel each other.They can sit in the same room.Sometimes they can even sit in the same chair.👀🪑And maybe somebody reading this needs permission to stop performing too.You do not have to tell everybody everything.Privacy is not dishonesty.Boundaries are not dishonesty.Taking time before you speak is not dishonesty.But beloved, please find somewhere you can tell the truth.Even if the first place is inside your own heart.Say:This hurt me.I miss what was.I am angry.I am afraid.I need help.I don’t know yet.I changed my mind.I need more time.I am proud of myself.I survived something difficult.I am learning.I am healing.I am still here.🔑Because honesty can be a key.A key that unlocks shame.A key that loosens the chain of pretending.A key that lets grief breathe.A key that allows joy to be real instead of performed.A key that makes room for healing.And sometimes the truth is not:”I have figured everything out.”Sometimes the truth is simply:”I am trying.”And beloved?Trying counts.❤️‍🩹I am learning not to require perfection from myself before I offer myself compassion.I am learning not to make recovery another place where I have to perform.I am learning that one difficult day does not erase every good day that came before it.I am learning that needing rest does not erase determination.I am learning that receiving help does not erase independence.And I am learning that being honest about what hurts does not mean I have stopped believing that healing is possible.It means I stopped requiring myself to lie on the way there.👀So be honest with them when honesty is safe.Be honest with the people who love you.Be honest with the people helping you.Be honest about what you need.Be honest about what you cannot do today.Be honest about what you are learning to do again.But before all of that—Be honest with you.For me.❤️‍🩹Because I want you here.Not the polished version.Not the pretending version.Not the version exhausted from convincing everybody that everything is fine.YOU.The learning you.The healing you.The laughing you.The crying you.The figuring-it-out-as-you-go you.There is room for that person here.🪑Pull up a chair.You don’t have to resolve everything before you belong.You don’t have to perform strength before you are loved.You don’t have to have all the answers before your life matters.Your life matters right now.Exactly here.One step.One step.One step.🔑❤️‍🩹🪑Asking for A Friend,Cassandra#YourLifeMattersToMeNote: One step. One step. One step. You are loved. You are NOT alone. Keep on being…YOU!
• THE CHAIR.
• WEDNESDAY 🌎
• WEDNESDAY 🌎
• MOM, WOMBIE, LET’S LOVE THE WORLD TOGETHER. 🌎❤️‍🔥

If your heart looks/feels anything close to mine, beloveds, you are currently in need of a whole lot of love and care.

Why?

You are simply exhausted.

Why?

Your world has turned into a never-ending series of try, fall, fail. Rinse. Repeat.

After a while, without an end, without resolution, without fulfillment…*sigh*

After a while, it begins to wear on the soul.

The Bible says for us to NOT be weary, in well doing. As we SHALL reap if we faint not. I’m too weary to remember where this is found in the bible(kidding Galatians 6:9).

My try is awfully tired. I just want to wake up and live in my fulfilled dreams. The way I imagine they will be.

I was laying in bed, pondering, wondering what the world would even LOOK like fulfilled.

Don’t get me wrong. I love life. I love yakking incessantly with God, with Life, with The Universe, and with you.

I love working. I love telling jokes and making folks laugh.

I love watching my sports. I love wandering through my eclectic mismadge of YouTube channels.

I love sooooooooooooooooooooo many things.

Yet, there has been a dream which has been calling me for the entirety of my life. I feel I may fail it/them. I fear I may I let them down.

I beat myself up for not having born them into fruition.

I no longer know if I am chasing my dreams or if they are now chasing me?

Am I afraid of them? Is this why they have not come?

Ah, God.

Why do Yall keep bothering me?

Asking for many friends.

How is your ❤️‍🩹 heart, beloveds?

If your heart is anything like mine, I feel your pain!

Be encouraged.

Keep going.

Don’t give up.

Not just yet.

I know you are tired. I know you want to be there already! So do I. The fact that we are not there yet IS an answer.

We are EXACTLY where we are supposed to be. The Universe has already calculated our dumbness, our foolishness, our fear, our doubt, our apathy, our disappointment, our try or lack thereof all into the equation.

In the meantime, beloveds, enjoy this life you have. We only get ONE shot at this. Enjoy each moment.

In case no one has told you today: I love you.

His and yours,

Cassandra

#YourLifeMattersToMe

Note: Ah, beloveds, be encouraged. The week is just starting. Just saying that makes me tired. Yet, just saying that also feels me with joy. Today, my dreams may yet well catch up to me or vice versa!

Love someone. Starting with you. Reach out to someone. Someone needs to hear and to know they are loved and not alone.

One step.

One step.

One step.

You are loved.

You are NOT alone.

Keep on being…YOU!

• 📫 BE HONEST WITH THEM. FOR, ME. ❤️‍🩹Beloveds,I have been thinking about honesty.Not the kind we demand from everybody else.The kind that requires us to sit with ourselves long enough to tell the truth about what is happening inside us.👀Because sometimes the hardest person to be honest with is yourself.Sometimes we know something hurts, but we keep calling it fine.Sometimes we know we are tired, but we keep calling ourselves lazy.Sometimes we know we need help, but we keep calling needing help weakness.Sometimes we know something has changed, but we keep trying to live as though nothing did.And sometimes we are so busy trying to make everybody else comfortable with our reality that we stop being honest about our own.❤️‍🩹I have had to learn this in ways I never wanted to learn it.My life changed.My body changed.My speech changed.My independence changed.The amount of effort required to do ordinary things changed.And there have been moments when I wanted so badly to be the Cassandra I remembered that I became impatient with the Cassandra who was actually here.But she deserves honesty too.She deserves tenderness too.She deserves patience too.She deserves to be loved without having to pretend that everything is easy.🪑So I am learning to tell the truth.I can be grateful and tired.I can have faith and still have questions.I can laugh and still hurt.I can celebrate progress and grieve what changed.I can be strong and need help.I can love people and still need boundaries.I can forgive somebody and still acknowledge what happened.I can believe God is with me without pretending every part of this journey feels good.Those truths do not cancel each other.They can sit in the same room.Sometimes they can even sit in the same chair.👀🪑And maybe somebody reading this needs permission to stop performing too.You do not have to tell everybody everything.Privacy is not dishonesty.Boundaries are not dishonesty.Taking time before you speak is not dishonesty.But beloved, please find somewhere you can tell the truth.Even if the first place is inside your own heart.Say:This hurt me.I miss what was.I am angry.I am afraid.I need help.I don’t know yet.I changed my mind.I need more time.I am proud of myself.I survived something difficult.I am learning.I am healing.I am still here.🔑Because honesty can be a key.A key that unlocks shame.A key that loosens the chain of pretending.A key that lets grief breathe.A key that allows joy to be real instead of performed.A key that makes room for healing.And sometimes the truth is not:”I have figured everything out.”Sometimes the truth is simply:”I am trying.”And beloved?Trying counts.❤️‍🩹I am learning not to require perfection from myself before I offer myself compassion.I am learning not to make recovery another place where I have to perform.I am learning that one difficult day does not erase every good day that came before it.I am learning that needing rest does not erase determination.I am learning that receiving help does not erase independence.And I am learning that being honest about what hurts does not mean I have stopped believing that healing is possible.It means I stopped requiring myself to lie on the way there.👀So be honest with them when honesty is safe.Be honest with the people who love you.Be honest with the people helping you.Be honest about what you need.Be honest about what you cannot do today.Be honest about what you are learning to do again.But before all of that—Be honest with you.For me.❤️‍🩹Because I want you here.Not the polished version.Not the pretending version.Not the version exhausted from convincing everybody that everything is fine.YOU.The learning you.The healing you.The laughing you.The crying you.The figuring-it-out-as-you-go you.There is room for that person here.🪑Pull up a chair.You don’t have to resolve everything before you belong.You don’t have to perform strength before you are loved.You don’t have to have all the answers before your life matters.Your life matters right now.Exactly here.One step.One step.One step.🔑❤️‍🩹🪑Asking for A Friend,Cassandra#YourLifeMattersToMeNote: One step. One step. One step. You are loved. You are NOT alone. Keep on being…YOU!
• THE CHAIR.
• WEDNESDAY 🌎
• WEDNESDAY 🌎
• MOM, WOMBIE, LET’S LOVE THE WORLD TOGETHER. 🌎❤️‍🔥