God: Shut the hell up, Cassandra.
Me: Well, that wasn’t very nice of You to say.
God: I meant for you to shut the hell up, beloved.
Me: What in the fresh hockey sticks does THAT mean?!…*pout*.
God: What have you been DOING, beloved, the past few days?
Me: Nothing. Okay, worrying, just a smidge, just a teensy weensy bit.
God: Why? What have you been focusing on?
Me: Well, reality came calling and brought all kinds of doubt with. Then, fear tagged along who ALWAYS runs with doubt. They have all been ganging up on me lately.
God: Why have you not sent them back from the hell from whence they came and reside?
Me: Welllllllllllll nowwwwwwww…..hhmm. They were making really good sense. Especially when 55 showed up and got to hooting and hollering about how vulnerable I am now. No job. NO friends. Not really. Only a few dollars in the bank. Plus I’m 55!!!!!
God: Is that ALL you have?
Me: Well….ehem. No.
God: Why didn’t you come and sit with me? Why did you not bring me your fear(s)? Have I not promised to be there for and with you?
Me: You did.
God: Do you trust me.
Me: With my life.
God: How about trusting me with your finances then? Last I checked the birds are STILL being fed. I can’t recall the last time I broke a promise to you.
Me: You haven’t.
God: Back to my original request:
Shut the hell up, Cassandra!
Me: K.
Be encouraged, beloveds. Change can be scary. The unknown can be terrifying. BUT, ONLY if are listening to utter foolishness that we are unloved and alone. HA!
Kick rocks fear. Take doubts with you. Tell reality to look up. Tell 55 to chill and take two seats. Rest, Cassandra. You CAN. You WILL.
asking for Your Friend,
Cassandra
#YourLifeMattersToMe
Note: I did not want to get out of bed this morning. I got up. I did not want to take out the trash or check the mail. I’m fixing to take out the trash and check the mail. Life goes on. I plan on moving on with it. Yes, my view is tough to look at. Destruction everywhere. Yet, things WILL be rebuilt. Somehow. Some kind of way.
Once rebuilt, things shall be different. I AM different. I am learning to make my piece with my new normal. I find myself angry with it. Yet, I was terribly unsatisfied with my old normal. The old normal, however, I knew. The old normal kept me from wandering too far. The old normal kept me from dreaming too loudly.
I find my dreams shouting now.
GO!
DO!
BUILD!
I don’t know how. My dreams no longer care. They were almost wiped out in the tornado. Get going, Cassandra. Ah, God, I don’t know where to start. I don’t know HOW. Heckamiah, God. I’m scared. I’m 55. I’m alone. Yet not. Here I go, Abba. Come with me. Asking for many friends…
One step.
One step.
One step.
You are loved.
You are NOT alone.
Keep on being…YOU!
- BELOVEDS, YOU CAN HAVE MY FLOWERS. I DON’T NEED THEM ANYMORE.
- Forgive them, Cassandra, God said to me
- Still In Love
- REAL TALK: DESPISE NOT SMALL BEGINNINGS, BELOVEDS.👘🦺🥾👟🥿👞🩴👢🩰👡⛑️🔌🕯️🔎🖌️🖋️📢
- IT ME!
Why Can't I Be Loud?! 